I need help?

Question

I just found out im gonna have a baby... Im 19 and I live with my parents, and if they find out they will kill me! I come froma really religious family, im Muslim....its unheard for a Muslim girl having a baby b/c it beats the idea of sex before marriage and so many other things!. I could NEVER in a million years tell my parents.

I dont believe in abortion....my bf is pressuring me to do it but I dont want to.....ive alread commited enough sins, im not gonna kill my baby.....Im so scared, i dotn know what to do. My parents would never understand. im 2 months and im running out of tme.....I just dont know what Im gona do....

Answer 1

It seems to me after reading the facts of your question that your religion isn't that important to you or you wouldn't be doing all these taboo things to go against it. Maybe you should figure this part of your life out first and be honest about it. Second if you didn't want a baby then why are you having unprotected sex??? Seems to me that you have no choice but to tell your parents what's going on and because if you can't handle this how are you going to handle raising a baby???? It's time to grow up and take responsibility for your actions!!

Answer 2

okay-do no have an abortion-I did that still feel horrible--it is a sin. You will never get over it. Your parents wont kill you--they will be very disappointed but they love you and will love their grandchild.

I had my first at 17 and was so scared--I hid it for months--but she is 17 now and all turned out okay. She is an awesome senior in high school and doing great. As for an abortion--you will live life never knowing that child. I had one when at 19 too-and to this day at 35 wonder whom that child would have been--getting preg is not a sin--it is a sign from your God that you need to make a change in life--

I don't know where you live but my email is [e-mail] and you can come and stay here if things get bad. I live in Michigan-- I totally understand and will support you in any way.

Answer 3

Oh sweetheart,you have just got in to a mess that undoable,ok heres my suggestion,in the states,at your age you are capable to make your own desition,but im not a muslim so i don't know anything about your religion,but heres the thing,you got to confront your parents about your situation,i know parent are not the easiest thing to have a civilise convo,but you have no choice,you might get nag,they might say things that a girl could hope not to hear from hers own parents mouth,but they are your parents,they might ba a drag,but they will give you advise on what you should do,since theres no use of talking to your BF.since your BF is not a supportive type,you love the things thats growing in you,that takes alot of gutts to think and feel at this panic point but you have a heart of gold,see...if you can can have a heart for something thats not fully grown,then just imagine what will your parents do for you!you are not running out of time,time is the only ting you have by your side,the only thing you don't have is option.so there you go,that is what i would suggest to you,i wish you best of luck and may Allah bless you and your child,have a wonderful live ahead of you.

Answer 4

I got pregnant when I was 20. I was so scared to tell my parents that I joked I would tell them on April Fools Day and maybe they would think I was kidding (I found out in December)!

Your story is a lot harder to give advice on. Basically you need to stick with the facts.

You are pregnant and it doesn't go away on it's own
-You don't want an abortion so that is out of the question.

This means you will go through pregnancy and give birth.
-You can't hide this, so you will need to tell your parents.
If you don't want to raise the baby there is adoption but that won't keep you from having to tell your parents.

I suppose the option to marry and appease your parents is out of the question? Even in the worst case if your parents threw you out there should be enough services to help you. I don't know your parents but I highly doubt they would be that extreme.

I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 5

If no baby was wanted you should have been using protection. Your going to have to tell your parents. They are hopefully going to be helping you raise this baby, If your bf is pressuring you for an abortion I don't think he will be of much help. you are 19-an adult, even though you live at home your parents hopefully shouldn't come down too hard on you, it's not like you are 13. Choose life, or adoption-good luck

Answer 6

I can not comment on the Muslim part, but I do know that there are agencies out there that can help you with making decisions wether it be to have the baby, have an abortion or doing adoption. They can also help you to talk to your parents. If you don't want to have an abortion, you need to stick to your guns and tell him no. If you do it for him and not for yourself, you could spend the rest of your life regretting it.
I know you are scared, but you are going to have to tell them. I think the best thing for you to do right now is make sure you are taking good care of yourself and go find someone to talk to, a professional.
I wish you all the best. Good luck to you.

Answer 7

I know how it feels like to be pressured, but not in a sense of being secretly pregnant. My advice to you is tell your parents about your situation. I know that they will get mad at you and preach you, but that doesnt mean they do not understand you or love you anymore. Remember this, when things keep falling apart, the only people whom you can turn to is your family. No one in this world could intimately understand you except them.

I'm upset by what you said that your boyfriend wants you to abort the baby. He doesnt love you. It also shows that he is not prepared.

Moreover, we now live in a world where getting pregnant at an early age is almost not an issue at all..
dont live with what others will tell about you or what happened to you.

That baby is a gift from God..take care of it and raise it well.

Go girl...God bless you.

Answer 8

All parents are the same if you ask me, they might be mad at frist but in the end they just want to be able to see there grandchildren, I understand your situation. Is there a possiblity that you could move out? I don't belive in abortion either. So if you can move out, just tell them when you do, and if you can't, all you can do is tell them cause you are gonna need the moral support. I don't think your boyfriend cares too much about you, but thats only what I can tell. Good luck

Answer 9

Do what your gut tells you, and adoption is not so bad. There ate alot of good people out there who want children. But the fact that you have doubts to me, means you want to keep your baby. And you should. Your parents are and always will be your parents. They will get over it. And when all is said and done they will have a beautiful grand baby. I will pray for you. And FYI: I to come from a very religious back round and I had a child when I wasn't married he is 8 now and we all love him to death. I can't imagine life without him. And my parents spoil him. It will be OK, you'll see.

Answer 10

well, I hate to say that 1. having the baby or 2. aborting the baby are your only options. either you have it, and get the hell beat out of you, or abort it, and go to "hell" if there is such a thing. honestly, i'd suggest moving away from your parents. you are 19, which is older than most people when they move out. just get a job and a cheap apartment, and tell them about the baby when you are ready. you don't want to become one of those freaks who lives with their parents into their 20's, or even later.