i am a guy, and i have a friend who i thought was a really good friend until he appearantly stopped wanting to hang out with me. well, we use to hang out every weekend, now it seems he only calls me when he has nothing better to do, about once every three weeks. there was a point when he told me we were best friends...but anyway, i am gay and he is fine with that, i also sorta like him to, and he seems to be fine with that also. i feel like i am being used as a backup friend... this saddens me because i do not have a lot of friends, especially ones i've told i'm gay. maybe he just doesn't like me as much as his other friends, but i though we were pretty tight. should i, if so, how should i approach him about this? just to let you know we never talk about any of this stuff so...
2007-01-12 17:03:14 · 5 answers · asked by J J 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dunno, seems you might be mixing up two different things. You say you guys are friends but you also say you like him, which is not a problem, but in a way it is. No one said that best friends needed to hang out 24/7. But the problem here is that you like him. Sadly, you are upset because of the fact that you like him and he is not giving you as much attention. He has his own life and somehow he is taking the time to at least touch base. You should really think about this.....do you miss the friend or do you miss the guy you like?
2007-01-12 17:25:55 · answer #1 · answered by nyenelra 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I was in your situation, I would definately take a risk and talk to your friend about what's going on. Instead of keeping yourself consistently wondering, just ask. Then you 2 can work something out. If the friendship gets better, great!
However if the friendship becomes bad. Don't be too depressed about it. There are many other people in this world who can be your friend. You just need to explore and have the confidence to meet other people. Believe in yourself and don't think losing this friend will be the end of the world. There's always some disappointments in life but don't let it make you fall down.
2007-01-12 17:14:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know whether he's spending time with his other friends? It may have nothing to do with you. He may just be going thru some things & pulling away from everyone. Something is keeping him away, but don't assume it's because he doesn't want to be friends with you. It's best to break down & just ask. Just say something like, "you haven't been around as much lately. Is their something going on that I can help with?" Like you said, friends are hard to come by so don't give up too easily. If he is just using you, though, you do have to put your foot down, but make sure before making such a drastic decision. Good luck~
2007-01-12 17:11:44 · answer #3 · answered by Jaysangl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know you've got a bad friend if any of these descriptions matches your friend.
1) Bossy Boots: who takes control of everything and always gives you advice, whether or not you ask for it. You like him/her because he/she's mega honest, well-meaning and full of ideas. He/she annoys you because he/she's so bossy that you've started to think your own opinions are totally worthless.
2) Sneaky Pal: is as nice as pie to your face, but not so nice behind your back. you love him/her because he/she's fun and good to hang out with. he/she annoys you because he/she can be mega nasty. It seems as if he/she lacks confidence because he/she puts you down to try and make herself feel good.
3) Sulk Monster: acts fine when things go his/her way, but lets darkness descend the minute he/she doesn't agree with something. You love him/her because he/she's great when she's in a good mood. He/she annoys you because she can get very huffy
4) Copycat: simply can't go anywhere without you. and he/she copies all your outfits. you love him/her because when the rest of your pals are busy he/she'll always come over for a game or video. He/she annoys you because your other friends think you;re actually the same person.
5) Pal Dropper: drops you when someone cooler comes along. you love him/her because when you're in favor you feel fab. he/she annoys you because he/she'll put your friendship completely on hold and start piling attention on the new guy/girl at school
hope this helps
Ps: I didn't exactly answer your question but i think you should talk to him about you feeling like a backup friend and why he stopped wanting to hang out with you
2007-01-12 17:18:54 · answer #4 · answered by van 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i really dont know..but sometimes people lie about how they feel about sexuality. like im bi and a few of my female friends were creeped out by it and my best friend was like "your not into me are you?" it kinda pissed me off that people who i felt would be supportive werent. but it could also be you guys are growing apart it happens..but if you are true friends it will work out in the end i promise.
2007-01-12 17:10:19 · answer #5 · answered by little lizzy lou lemon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋