As a Christian, what would you do if your son or daughter told you they were gay?

Question

As a Christian, what would you do if your son son or daughter told you they were gay?

Would your response be any different if they were still living at home (age 15-18), versus living on their own, or at university (over the age of 18)? What would your response be to them? What would you do?

If you are a parent, please seriously consider your answer.

I am doing research on Christianity, and I do believe, although some sects of Christianity vilify homosexuality, the majority of Christians are incredible loving people, whose goal in life is to be kind, loving, and lend a loving hand to those in need.

Answer 1

Your child is your child. I love my children with all my heart. I think I would be shocked at first but my love is unconditional and I am there through thick and thin. That is what moms do and that is what Christians do.

Answer 2

i would be concerned and saddened, the same way I'd be if they told me they were pregnant out of wedlock, were on drugs, or doing anything else contrary to the values I'd instilled in them. I think my response would be the same regardless their age. I would be supportive of my child, but not of their lifestyle. I would do everything I could to get them the help they needed to become whole. And no matter what their orientation, I will continue to love and accept them for who they are. This answer is probably not going to be popular, but it's how I feel. I believe homosexuality is not what God wants for us. He did not intend for anyone to be gay. I believe it's a sinful way to live. I know a lot of gay people and they are for the most part incredibly nice people and I have no problem with them as people. I just don't agree with their lifestyle and I know God doesn't either. And what God says is my standard and I hope the standard my children live by as well.

Answer 3

Okay, I know you asked this of Christians and I am not one anymore, but as someone with 25 years experience in the ministry and another 10 years in different churches, i do hve a perspective on this from the Christian view.

I disagree with your last paragraph saying most Christians are loving, but you are entitled to your opinion.

If a child is at home and under age, the parent can forbid them to see certain people they may sleep with, but love should be shown at all times, the problem is most Christians have trouble showing love to homosexuals.

What I would personally have done while still a Christian if my boys were already grown, would be to say i do not aprove and I taught you what the bible said, but i will love and accept you, and will be here if you need me and want to change.


Today however as a non christian i would say, I love you no matter what, and I accept you unconditionally and your sexual orientation does not matter, you are my son and I love you as you are.

A Christian if true to their beleifs cannot approve of the lifestyle and is always hoping for a change.

I did business with a man who said his boy was a homosexual and he disowned him, and I talked to him and said that he should accept his son and his son's lover, because at least he is alive and wants a relationship with him. I told him that it would be worse if his sone was a faithful Christian cult member, and was not homosexual but refused to have anything to do with him because of religious differences.

That man listened and started accepting his son.

Answer 4

The core of the gay issues in the church is that people will project their own homophobia onto their spirituality and call it "God's Will". Yes it is an abomination. So is a pridefull look. But I don't see anyone getting thrown out of a church for being arrogant.
To directly answer your question. I would be ok with it as long as they know GOD's law and understand why Jesus was raised from the dead. Once they know that then all I can do is love them and support them anyway I can. Now if they wanted to be a Seventh Day Adventist, Mormon, Or JW then I would have to open a whole cann on them! That's a promise.

Answer 5

I am a Christian and very proud of it. As a Christian, we are not to judge anyone ever! That is not our job ever. Judgment comes later, when one passes to the here after. Only God can judge.
If I had a son or daughter who told me they were gay, I would still love that child and support them in anyway I can as a parent. My job as a parent is to love my child unconditionally, guide them and try the best way I can to teach good morals and whatever I can teach to give my child the best start in life that I can. I don't have to like or understand what my child does, but I will always love my child.

Answer 6

I would still be supportive, although I would suggest that he or she see a psychologist to discuss the issue. Nowadays it seems that being gay is a popular subculture that our children and even adults exhibit as part of a friends network or scene. Some examples are this genre of music that is labeled "emo." I have taken the time to sit down with some young family relatives and inquire about this "label" and most of the feedback I recieved was that it's not just about music. It has to do with how you act or feel about certain social ideas. Kissing and being close to the same sex was somthing that I also noticed with some bands, like EMI (or something like that),something at the disco,etc. Some of these band members are featured in some magazines in rather homosexual poses, but it's "emo" the children say, not gay. I wouldn't want my son to make decisions that would carry long term emotional effects and social stigma because he was trying to fit in. I think seeing a professional would make him/her feel more clear about his/her decision to live such a lifestyle. Being gay is not something I would compare to a degree plan when one cannot go see a counselor and request to change to something else. It's something that follows a person through the years,causes sexual confusion for them during their pubescent stages and finally comes out at some point. Atleast I believe this is the case with those that believe were born with this inbalance. Lately it seems to me that it's becoming a more "popular thing" than it is a lifestyle or genetic inbalance. Miss USA, Terry Elizabeth is also another example of this. She wouldn't consider herself gay, but maybe bi or straight, I think. If this is truly a genetic inbalance, then why is bisexuality so common with young people today. Is it really genetics or do we just want to have fun with in the devil's playground?Anyhow this is how I would approach one of my children telling me they were gay. I would love them just the same, but I'd want to protect them much more and make them more aware of my support to live their lives in happiness. I would not let the devil use this to seperate me from my children or damage my relationship with them. My children will be loved the way I wasn't,regardless of their mistakes,decisions, ideas,etc. If my children committed murder, I would love them still. There is a God for judgement, but I will love my children to fulfill my promise to him when he blessed me with them.

Answer 7

Be tolerant and love them unless they were so far gone into the abyss it became impossible.

And that doesn't mean Homosexual world, it means the abyss.

There are some things you simply can't accept. Your son or daughter "going down" on a 7 year old. Most homosexuals won't accept that, either!

Most homosexuals have ETHICS.

Drugs with needles.

That knows no boundaries

If they are just simple every day homosexuals I would have problems with it, but that's only my own prejudices.

I'd probably have a harder time if they converted to Islam.

Given a choice, I'd rather my kids be homosexuals than Muslims.

Answer 8

Things would go on much as they did before. I would have instilled a knowledge of God and an understanding of Christianity through education. That would means that God is to be trusted, Gay or Straight. Being Straight is not a prerequisite of being a 'truster' of God. My son or daughter would already know that Jesus is the only way into heaven, and trusting him for that means everything.

Answer 9

Personally, I know that I would be upset, but I would also be accepting. I think the important and crucial in being a TRUE Christian is acceptance of 1) things that are different and 2) things that you cannot change. I have many friends that are gay and my opinions are homosexuality have definitely been shaped by those friendships. By not accepting my own children if they were gay, I would be acting on a double standard that is not acceptable.

Answer 10

Honestly? First I would cry my heart out. I would not speak to anyone for about three days until I could think more clearly. Then I would talk to God, then I would remind my child of the things she or he has learned and then I would shut up about it and pray, pray and pray. I would never disown them and would continue to love them the same, but I would also continue to pray.
I would feel the same if way if they got hit by a car.Love your kid nomatter what they go through in life, even if they make the choices I believe to be be wrong.

Answer 11

My child would not be so deceived and confused. I will have a mentally healthy intelligent child, who will know the difference between truth and faslehood and be ashamed to even entertain such inordinate lusts because he or she will be blessed by the Lord, not infected by the mental diseaes of this filthy godless, unchristian society.
Paraphrased Psalm 1
How blest are they who keep from evil ways,
who heed not sinful counsel all their days,
nor seek the company of wicked scoffers,
but take delight in all the Lord God offers
within the statutes of his holy Law:
both day and night they ponder it with awe.

They are like trees that grow beside the stream,
whose fruitful limbs with ripened bounty teem,
whose verdant leaves will fade and wither never;
all that they undertake in faith will ever
be blessed by God with great prosperity.
But wicked ones a different lot shall see.

For they, like chaff, before the wind are blown
and will not last before the judgement throne,
nor will they stand in council of the holy.
But God protects all those who follow solely
the paths of virtue and of righteousness,
while death shall stalk the ways of wickedness.