Is it better to let go of the one you love or keep fighting?

Question

About a year and a half ago I answered the question "does love at first sight actually exist?" I met someone and without ever speaking a word just fell in love. I knew the first time looking into her eyes she was the one. There were butterflies in my stomach and this warm feeling of joy and comfort that overwhelmed me. I just knew we were destined to be with each other. We started dating then stopped after about a month. Kept in touch (and still do), then started dating again about 7 months later. Was dating for about two months then stopped again. Since then we still talk, hang every now and then but yet she won't return calls, e-mails, or texts. Well actually she will but only now and then. And as soon as I start thinking about moving on she finds a way to stay right in front of me, like a sign saying to "hold on, be patient". Should I hold on? Should I just let it go? I’m tired of being confused. She says she loves me very much, but why would she do this?

Answer 1

Let her go and move on...

Answer 2

This sounds like an on-off relationship. I'm not sure what you would really want but if I were in your situation, I would not wait for so long and speak to this girl right away and talk things out. I dislike being in a hanging situation, and I personally do think that it is too unfair for a person to hold another on for like years without actually a certain answer if you two were in love. I would move on and make sure that is decided. Never let anyone deter you from making any sound decision that is right for yourself. The simplest, ask yourself if you love her? And do you want to go on such a life with the fact that you love each other and yet going through tormenting doubts in your relationship? The answers are all within you. Good luck!

Answer 3

I believe love at first sight does exist. I fell in love love when I was about 13 or 14 years old. I really believe i loved this boy. I loved him through many b/f's while growing up. (we kind of dated a little bit but his feeling were not the same :( I always thought of him through my whole life. I am now 34. I am happily married for going on 10 years. I saw this guys pic in the paper a few months ago, he's getting married. I could have cried. Then I ran into him at the store. I didn't' even recognize him. He was calling my name. I could feel my heart doing flip flops. Don't get me wrong .... I love my husband very much, but a teen crush is hard to beat.

I say ... maybe u should stick it out. Are you both pretty young? Sometimes more commitment comes with maturity.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.... either way you can find love again even if she is not the right one

Answer 4

Oh you seem like such a romantic. The way you tell your story is wonderful. I have to wonder though, why do you guys start and stop and start and stop? When you say you are tired and confused, I'm thinking that maybe this on again, off again relationship is her doing--and if that's the case, I'm sorry that it's happening to you in this way. It's possible that this someone is afraid of commitment. Tell her everything that you just told us. Ask her if you should hold on. Tell her that you are tired and confused and that you need to understand what is in her heart once and for all. It's not healthy for the mind or heart to play games in the name of love. This is serious stuff. Either she loves you or she doesn't. You need to speak with her and ask her to open up to you.

Answer 5

you are the guy that is there when no one else is there. Why does she show you so little respect not to answer your calls, e-mails ect... Why do you let her continue to block your life and keeping you from meeting someone that will love and respect you? Love her from a far. She can't love you because she can't be with you. She's waiting for her prince charming to come along and sweep her off her feet while hanging on to you.Try this... next time she calls you pick up the phone and tell her that you are really busy. It will be hard at first, but you shouldn't sit around waiting for her to make up her mind to love you or leave you. You can't get on with your life if she is constantly reappearing.

Answer 6

What ever you feel, she doesn't. She may just like to keep you in reserve in case she needs a date for a wedding when shes between boyfriends.
You can fall in love at first sight, but upon knowing the person that love can change, and it may be time for you to give up on the ideal and go out and have fun. BTW, you can fall in love more than once, and its lots better when its returned.

Answer 7

well i think that u need to do what ur hart is telling u to do and if she is doing this now then she will do this later and u never know she might have some one on the side and she is wanting to see if its what she wants and then if its not then she knows that u are right where she wants u and then there u are and then she will do this time after time and then ull be the one getting hurt and then she might know that if she let u go all the way that ull find someone that u love and then she will not have u no more and then this is away to say i have him right where i want him u are better then this and u can find someone else that is not going to play games and that is what i see is going on her dont let her do that

Answer 8

Well the next time you talk to her why not ask her a couple questions to see where you and her stand. Relationships can be very tricky and i know where your comming from. You need to get it out your system so you can either move on and be happy, be with her or wait for the right time till she is ready. But don't make yourself go crazy over someone if you find that she is trying to avoid the situation. Good Luck

Answer 9

I used to be in love myself so I know where you're coming from. Shifty women will always try to hold on to as many guys as possible because they always want to have a "back up" to fall back on. If she usually doesn't respond to your calls, e-mails, or texts then I would move on and find someone who will put their money where their mouth is if they say they love you. If someone loves another person, then they should be willing to do whatever it takes to be with that person, and it doesn't sound like she's willing to do anything.

Trust me, the longer you wait the more it's going to hurt. Get out while you still have a heart because it's a lot harder to fall in love again once you're bitter and jaded. Hell, it's almost impossible.

Answer 10

When my ex-husband and I met for the first time. He went and told his best friend that he was in love and that I was the girl he was going to marry. I laughed when I heard that, because I didn't believe in love at first sight.
Never the less, it took him over a year of pursing me before I even agreed to go out with him. But, when I finaly did I fell hard in love with him. He never gave up on me and we got married.
But, three years later we seperated and seven years later divorced. But, if I had to do it all again I definetly would.
So don't ever give up. She may be the love of your life, the girl of your dreams, your soul mate!

Answer 11

Good lord y'all must be Reading my diary. I have the exact same problem as you. I love my ex to death. I had to break up with him two years ago. I wish it would have never have happened. I just recently last year got back to talking to my ex. Then everything started to fall apart when his ex started to come back to church. i stuck in there and called him every night and told him how i felt. He told me he would never trade me for his ex. He told me he thought of me every day while he worked and that eh loved me so much but that he couldn't be in a relationship right then. I kept telling him how i felt and eventually he asked me to date him again.
I honestly think it makes you stronger if you let go of the person you once loved but it makes you even stronger if you at least try to work it out and keep fighting for the man you love so much