How do I get a [decent] man?

Question

I am 25 years old and have been single my whole life. Guys are never interested in me other than as friends. I don't mean to sound egotistical, but I really don't get why SOMEone wouldn't be interested. People always tell me I look like Angelina Jolie. I'm fit, I'm intelligent, I'm wordly, I'm opinionated. I study esoterica. I play in a rock band. I have a job.

I have tried asking friends to set me up - this has NEVER worked. I've never found ANYone compatible via online dating systems. (One actually told me based on my preferences, it had no matches. I actually got a refund.) I tried Craigslist and that was a dead end as well. Whenever I am with a new group of friends who are single, I am always the one who ends up still single in a few months. I get along with people very easily and no one seems to understand how it's possible that I'm single, let alone never had a boyfriend. Every time I ask a guy out/make any move, I get turned down flat. What should I do?

Addendum- the reason I've tried to make a move on guys is because they never have towards me. I can't think of one instance (other than drunks or certifiably mentally unstable individuals). Unless I'm oblivious, which is definitely possible, but probably should have been noticed at this point.

I asked a councellor once and they couldn't figure it out either. I suppose it's ridiculous to ask such a question to people who have no idea of my actual social situation. But, I have no leads, that's why I'm asking.

I definitely will keep "toning it down" a bit in mind. I tend to be more introverted than extroverted, but perhaps what is getting out is a bit strident. I'll try to observe myself.

No, I'm not going to post any pictures. Believe it or eat it.

Answer 1

I'm sorry, but you have to be doing something wrong. If, as you say, you are attractive, there has to be SOMETHING that turns people off - after all, you are the only constant in this equation. Since I don't know you, I can't say what that is. You probably would not get a straight answer from your friends either. Perhaps a psychologist could figure it out - you see what I'm trying to get at - an impartial 3rd party who could observe and report. Good luck and keep on trying.

Answer 2

I am so sorry. honestly i am having a hard time believing your story and i don't even know you. on paper you sound wonderful (granted Angelina is one of my hot buttons, but that aside) it would seem that you are looking in all the wrong places. try a paradigm shift. Look in all the places you have not, an open mind is key. i don't know what your expectations have been in a man but frankly we have problems seeing a tree in a forest. best advice i have is for you to not try. forget about a relationship, push it to the last thing on your mind. immerse yourself in some "good" thing, service or something of that nature. my experience has been that when you are looking the least that's when the answer appears. Kind of like when you are talking about that certain actor in that one movie, and you can see his face and name all the movies he has been in, but cant remember his name. then 2 days later you are at work and the name just pops into your head. Try that, don't look, stop looking and just enjoy your life, bet the love of your life is bumped into when you least expect it and for certain in your most embarrassing moment too! Good Luck.

Answer 3

Maybe you are trying to hard. It seems like you have a lot going on for you, but don't feel complete unless you have a man. Just be happy with your life as it is and don't try to hard. The right man will find you, but I've been told by friends you shouldn't go looking for him. I wish you all the luck because you sound like a great person.

Answer 4

I think that u might be to nice and you are just a good friend and they know that if they did get with u then it might not work out and then they lost a good friend and u need to be mean to them and then they will like u i thought that to at one time and now that i was so mean to my man and now we are getting married in jun and i told him that i did not like him and that he got on my nerve and then he never went away and then now look and i had some one tell me that at one time and then i did it and it work so try it and see where it takes u and then like i said you might be a better friend then a girl friend

Answer 5

Dont worry about it. Your tryring to rush through things. There are so many people out there. Kepp your head up. Theres ALWAYS, AALLWWAAYYSS somebody out there for you. Dont give up. You just have 2 b patient. You have another 60 yrs on you. You will find a man. Im promise you even though that u think my promise is nothing, but believe me, it will happen.

Answer 6

I say stop looking...you can't force something to happen....Situations like yours are there is girl is wondering why nobody is looking when all the long there has been somebody there just waiting for her to notice him.....This is a hard question...word wise you seem like you shouldn't have a problem but when it comes down to it, it's about how you carry yourself....try talking to somebody that knows more about body language.....just a thought

Answer 7

That is strange, how it happens both online and in person. I think you might be a bit intimidating, tone it down some. I hope you don't put that fact that your opinionated on your ads. To men that just means your bitchy.

Answer 8

its hard, maybe your standards are to high?
everyone has something wrong with them
very good looking person could mean a self cocky person
nice, sensitive guy is a ugly mofo (me)
rich guy = snobby
layed back relaxed guy = druggie
its a win lose situation..

Answer 9

Maybe you are trying to hard to find someone. When you least expect it love happens. So try being patient. Hang out with your girlfriends, you will meet someone when the time is right.

Answer 10

Stop trying so hard to find a guy. Sometimes when you stop trying to look for something or do something. It will fall into your lap.