Re: Step Son's girlfriend wanting to get pregnant?

Question

Ok, I just found out a couple of weeks that my step- son was having sex. Well, talked about safety etc... Let him know we dont condone it but if he is going to do it to be safe... Well, guess what I find today a letter from the girlfriend saying that she is ready to be a mom and that she wants to have a baby with him , if he thinks he can handle it... What do we do??? My husband and I are at our wits end... Should we send him to live in another state with his mom so that this wont happen? What can we do? We love him and want to see him succeed in life but this would destroy him he is only 16- just turning tomorrow and this girl is wanting a baby.. Do I tell my husband? HELP

Answer 1

Omigosh! yes, tell your husband and call her parents! Good Luck!

Answer 2

You should definitely tell your husband (think of it on the other shoe) Show him the letter. How old is this girl? Same age? They're too young to be thinking about these things. Sending your step-son away will not make anything right. You tell a child "no" & what do they go out & do? Try it - because they want to know why it's so bad.

All of you, husband, stepson, girlfriend & her parents (or guardians) should sit down & discuss the best way of thinking on this situation.

Good luck to you & your family.

Answer 3

yes, the best thing for you to do is let all of the kid's parents know about this, and discuss how to handle it together. I would suggest getting together a as family (if possible all of the parents) and confront the boy, or maybe not allt ogether that might be overwhelming and seem like you a ganging up on him so you might try talking to him yourself or have the father do it. But you definitely need to discuss why it is not a good idea for a 16 year old to have a child. tell him that it just wouldnt be fair to the child. Ask him what he thinks about the situation, if he wants a child too explain to him how that will affect his life; and have him explain how he thinks he could raise a child when he only a teenager.
Try not to get into a yelling macth or arguement that will only make things worse. If problems arise, try to seek professional help, like a counselor of some sort.

Answer 4

Yes you tell your husband and then you sit down and have a serious conversation with him. If he objects you make him listen. Dont let him go until you have honestly talked it out. Not just a "Dont do this, dont do that" hear his side and give yours and tell him that impregnating a girl will ruin his life.

I think that sending him to another state is really extreme but you could tell him that you dont want him seeing that girl anymore. He will argue but you know what is best for him.

Make sure that you get his father involved. He is likely to ignore you cause of that whole "you're not my mom" thing step-children do. I don't know if he is like that but it would be best to tell his dad.

Answer 5

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Answer 6

i know it would be hard, but tell your husband, call her parents, and all of you get together to talk about it. tell her it could ruin her life....she won't get a good education, won't get a good job, won't be able to have an enjoyable life. ask her how she'll pay for a baby without a job that pays above minimum wage, what she'd do if she didn't graduate highschool, how she'll be able to afford bills and a child with no education...etc. tell her that babies aren't just cute and adorable, they're hard work and time consuming. having a child takes over friends and parties. she won't be able to hang out with her friends alone or go shopping without taking a stroller and diaper bag and bottles. she won't be able to finish growing up or be a kid anymore. tell her she should wait until she's out of school, has a good job, a loving HUSBAND, enough money to support a family, and maturity to be an adult. most 16 year olds don't have the maturity or patience it takes to raise a child 24/7. don't send your step-son away. that may make him feel as tho you don't love him or want him around. just make sure that he knows if they have a child you won't let him be a pussy and walk away from his girlfriend and child. he will have to grow up as much as her and take as much responsibility as her to help care for his child. it takes 2 to make one, it should take 2 to raise one.

Answer 7

Don't jump to conclusions. Just because the girl thinks she's ready for a baby, doesn't mean your stepson feels the same. Show the letter to your husband and then sit down with both your husband and stepson and talk about it. Also, I think you ought to give the letter to the girl's parents. They need to get their daughter some help. Good luck.

Answer 8

Of course tell your husband. Also, send the gf parents a copy of her letter and ask to talk to them. Your stepson needs some cold hard facts about being a parent, his responsibilities, emotional and financial. And let him know that he won't be off the hook after the 15 minutes of fun is done.

Answer 9

Send him to a parenting class maybe!? Keep closer eye on him so he can't have sex. Try and introduce him to smarter cuter women who are doing something with their life. Give him fake money, and fake bills...have him manage them...and then throw in baby costs.
Sending him out of state will not help...if he seriously wants the girl, he will just run away, or develope and unhealthy hatred for everybody...and that could be bad. Address the problem, don't throw him away. I know that is not what you would see it as "throwing him away"...but he will. At that age...kids just want to feel that they are capable of making their own decisions...and they will fight you if you tell him flat out no...or make him move.

Answer 10

the best thing to do is to talk to your stepson and explain to him the consequences of having a baby so young . . . he might have a level head on his shoulders and has already decided that this is something that he doesn't want to do, so don't jump to conclusions . . . and don't be so ready to send him away . . . sending him to another state won't really prevent this from happening if that's what he wants . . he'll find a way to be with her or most likely end up with another girl . . . so just be upfront with him and be open . . but don't be argumentive about it . .

Answer 11

Yes i would tell your husband, his mom and the girls parents. If you have to put a stop to them dating. He is not needing a baby at 16. I don't know what would make a young girl want to get pregnant. She must be wanting too to maybe try to keep him with her which is the most dumbest reason to get pregnant.
Good luck to your whole family