I have/had a guy friend who thought he had to be my secret pal with small gifts of money and paid me a lot of attention thinking that I needed it but never told me why. I felt awkward around him and got where I could not speak to him about it. I felt kind of initimated by him. I guess he got the wrong impression of me.
2007-01-12 14:22:07 · 13 answers · asked by Sweet Pea 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The same reason women "rescue" men, everyone wants to feel like somebody's hero.
2007-01-12 14:26:28 · answer #1 · answered by LoneStarLou 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His perception had to come from you. Do you talk a lot about always being short on money or not being able to handle relationships/household chores/your job, etc? Think about what you have said around him.
There is also the other spectrum...he could be a stalker thinking he is the only one who understands you. You need to have a friend with you and approach him and ask outright WHY he is doing this. Tell him it makes you uncomfortable and you would prefer the gifts stop. If this is continuous, it is called harassment and you need to contact the police. These type of guys can be dangerous.
2007-01-12 22:30:10 · answer #2 · answered by She Devil 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its a weird psycological thing we have to be the protector. We're the biggest suckers for a "hard luck" case. I know I have had a few that I defended and took care of and started a relationship with then turned out that I was mearly helping them get back to being strong again. I was a crutch but I really didn't mind you know. At least they're happy and I helped someone I cared for. Better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all.
2007-01-12 22:29:07 · answer #3 · answered by forgiving_madison 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When a man/friend is around someone he likes and might even know in his head that he will never be with. This can make your feelings even stronger for this person. Listening to all the problems about everything even there bad previous relationships. Just hoping some day that your feelings toward him will change. Then again he could just be a nice guy or just wanting to sleep with you. ;o)
2007-01-12 22:30:23 · answer #4 · answered by hoosier69420 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
so that when he rescues you, you can rescue him. You never know, he may just want to settle down and have a family but in order to do that he wants to "save" you from whatever you're going through so that for the rest of your life you have to be grateful to him. These guys usually have some type of self esteem issue, you did right with bypassing him.
2007-01-12 22:30:37 · answer #5 · answered by california girl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is wanting to be rescued himself. He sees something in you that he sees in himself and thinks you need that in your life. People like that can be overbearing and some get too obsessed with the person and it gets to the point that there stalking you. Keep your distance and let him know he`s a friend and that`s it . Nothing more!!
2007-01-12 22:30:14 · answer #6 · answered by bren_jim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They're stuck in the ideology that women deserve special treatment and a rescuer because we're more "fragile" than men. We all know that it's bull — we're just as strong as men are.
2007-01-12 22:30:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some men are like that maybe because they grew up in a household with a mother like that etc. Some guys are just nice. If he made/makes you feel uncomfortable just don't hang out with him.
2007-01-12 22:26:41 · answer #8 · answered by chemky1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't stand a man weak in the knees and fawning over any woman whether it be a stripper or a girlfriend such as yourself. I have no idea why he thinks this is what a man should do. My guess is they are desperate. The really sad commentary is that he probably will find someone else who will welcome it.
2007-01-12 22:31:16 · answer #9 · answered by Mere Exposure 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes there may be ulterior motives, other times its just a natural instinct to help someone in need.
2007-01-12 22:28:44 · answer #10 · answered by karldon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋