Why do anti-abortionists say such hateful things about women who have abortions?

Question

I've never known a woman to get an abortion without angonizing over the decision, but so many people act like women who have abortions use it as a form of careless birth control or something.

You people that say those things really need to gain a heart and look at things from another person's perspective. Women don't have abortions because they are hateful and careless. They have abortions because their birth control failed and they can't possibly afford to feed another mouth. They have abortions because they were raped and they can't handle being reminded of it every day. They have abortions because no one ever taught them in school about condoms, their football captain boyfriend pressured them to have sex, and now they're terrified that they won't be able to go to college, that they'll never be loved, that their parents will hate them.

No woman as an abortion without a lot of thought and a lot of prayer. Why are you so hateful to women faced with such a difficult choice?

And don't give me this "for the baby" crap. You can be sad for "the baby" without saying that the woman "deserves to die" or that she's a slut and a whore, or all the other things I've seen said on Y!A. Be respectful.

Ray J, here's a penny: Buy a clue. Abortions are expensive and incredibly painful. You have intensive bleeding and cramps for months. VERY few (if none at all) women use it as "birth control".

Answer 1

I think people should mind their own business. If you haven't had a pregnancy scare or an abortion, then how can you know what it's like?

People say that some girl is a whore, well how do you know why she acts the way she does? A lot of people seem "tough" and like they don't care, but are hurting on the inside. Maybe she was abused as a kid and she uses sex to feel loved. You don't know. People shouldn't judge because no one is perfect.

I don't really like abortion, but I'll fight tooth and nail for a woman to have the final say over what happens to HER body. And I won't judge her for her choices - only she knows what's best for her.

Answer 2

Abortion is a touchy and sore subject. My personal beliefs? Abortions are wrong--but that doesn't give me the right to tell every woman who decides to get one, that they can't have one. And I'm certainly not going to call them evil, or bad, or that they are killers. Because what the really are, is tragic. Any woman who has to resort to an abortion has clearly had a bad time of it, and people should be giving them their support, not their hatred.

A close friend of mine got an abortion while we were in high school. She didnt want to have one, her parents made her get it. It was either abortion, or they'd kick her out. A lot of parents are like that. They couldn't bear the shame of having a teen mother as a daughter, so they made her have the abortion instead.
What's really sick is that she's always wanted to be a mother, and now she thinks that because she had the abortion, that means she'd be a horrible mother and I think right now she's decided not to have kids at all.

And really, it wasn't even a choice for her.

My friend was torn up about it, and she still is.

Granted, thats not your everyday case, but there are other circumstances to take into consideration. Maybe if the anti-abortionists would calm down for one second and actually look at the women who get abortions-- the majority, and not the minority, then they would understand how to do such a thing is a hard and painful choice.

Not everyone is fortunate enough to have the family support to carry the child to term and give it up for adoption, or keep it. Not everyone can afford the long term care of a child, so they carry it to term without anyone knowing (It's possible, a different friend had her kid and no one knew, not even her parents. She just said it was a beer gut. She has a little boy now, and she's 19.) and either kill it or just abandon it. Or they have it taken away later in life, and then later on they end up losing the child, because they were too young or poor to care for it properly. And then we end up with kids in foster care, who get lost in the system.

Abortion shouldn't be a form of birth control, but has anyone really given a thought as to why they happen? People ignore the fact that teens/young adults have sex before marriage, and they aren't taught about proper protection. Safe sex is hardly taught, they don't go into the pros and cons of a condom vs. a pill, or how safe sponges and the like really are. They just tell you what they do, and then move on saying "But really, abstinance is best! If you have sex before marriage, you're a bad person! Sex is bad!"

They don't even cover masturbation--which is by far much safer, because you do it alone (most of the time), and you *know* where your hand has been, right?

Maybe if the adults who run the show in the school districts and in the government got their heads out of the sand, and taught proper sex education instead of abstinance only sex ed, then maybe we would have fewer teen pregnancies, or fewer teens with STD's of some kind. And maybe even fewer abortions in the world.

Clearly, abstinance doesn't seem to be working.

Answer 3

Abortion kills babies. Sorry but that is what it does. It is bad enough to find yourself pregnant but to turn around and destroy a child's life is selfish. I find it hard to believe that young women don't know how to prevent pregnancies in this day. If a mistake is made then give the child up for adoption. There are lots of people wanting children who can't have any. As you said yourself that the procedure is painful and dangerous, it can cause complication that could prevent you from having children later in life. And I really doubt that parents would stop loving a girl who got pregnant. They would be upset, but that is no reason to kill a child

Answer 4

You cover many reasons for not raising a child. But you don't give the woman any responsibility for her actions. Either not making good choices for her body nor giving up for adoption the child of a forced situation. ANYTHING other than "rape" is no ones fault than the woman's poor choice. If you can't raise a child you should not have sex.
And you can't say that no one has an abortion without prayer and thought, My wife and I were all set to adopt the child of a friend who made a poor life choice, paper work was filed all were fine with the situation, she quite talking to us for about three weeks, when we called her up her kids told us she had the abortion a couple weeks earlier. She refuses to speak to us anymore, and will not tell us why she killed our child.

Answer 5

Suppose we allow the fetus to live and let him/her decide wheather or not the parents should be executed.

I do not condemn someone who has had an abortion. I believe however, that it is wrong..that it is in fact, murder.

I myself was adopted...and believe that the "difficult choice" is not about abortion,but rather understanding that the unborn child is a living human being.

..and yes I have been tested on my beliefs..as I convinced my wife 10 years ago not to have an abortion,even though the child was not mine...she had been involved in an affair...when the rubber meets the road one finds out how much they really believe what they preach.

Answer 6

I dissaprove of abortion and I think it is in opposition to Gods commandment "Thou shalt Not Kill"
However I am no better than anyone else, I also break Gods commandments and sin is sin, there are no large sins or small sins. God says if we break one letter of the law, we are guilty of breaking all His laws. Period.
God judges individuals as well as Nations for their sins.
When nations are judged for their sins, many innocent people suffer the consequences of the ones who committed the sins that led to that nations judgment. Abortion is such a sin, God judges the country I live in for the sins of the people.
Please consider my position for a moment, I believe I am forced to endure Gods wrath because of something I do not approve of and do not participate in. Sin can affect many people and Gods curses for some sins can be to the next 4 generations.
This is a fact of Gods Word.
If you always drove the speed limit and drove very carefully, how would you feel if the police one day set a huge dragnet for speeders and you were caught in that dragnet and forced to pay a fine, or even do jail time for something you did not do? Even though you were obeying the posted speed limit, you were convicted of speeding anyways.
I only ask that you look at both sides of the coin.
It is Gods job to judge us all, it is my job to tell people and show them the love God has for them, no matter what they have done, whether they be rich or poor, christian or non-christian.
I will not judge anyone, however if you come up and ask me what
I think about abortion, I will respectfully and lovingly tell you that in Gods eyes I believe it is murder. Adoption is a much better option.

Answer 7

>>Abortions are expensive and incredibly painful. You have intensive bleeding and cramps for months.<<

I had an abortion 20 years ago, and that wasn't my experience. I had general anesthesia and felt wonderful, physically, within hours. (Psychologically and emotionally, though, it has just about destroyed me.)

>>VERY few (if none at all) women use it as "birth control".<<

That is a matter of opinion. If there is no medical reason for an abortion, is it not "birth control"?

Answer 8

i have considered the circumstances. i do understand (and to be fair, ill just say....i understand as much as i can, seeing as i was never in that circumstance). i have had nightmares. i have thought about the shame, the lack of money, nowhere to turn. and i know that it is an extremely tough decision.....agonizing, yes....
but i still dont understand how that can justify having an abortion....when so many other options are available. they can give it for adoption. and i know my state allows you to walk up to any hospital and just give them your baby....you dont have to tell them your name or anything.
the only reason abortion seems ok is becuase you dont see the baby. like wars fought in far of countries, it doesnt seem real. but there is a life in this person's stomach.... after a few weeks it has already began forming a spine, spinal cord, and heart. It begins having brain waves. it can register and react to light, sound, and PAIN. its heart regualrly beats. its organs....lungs...eyes...ears...limbs....are forming. and all in the first few weeks. how can you deny it is a person after a short few weeks in which it perfectly represents one....10 toes, 10 fingers, and fingerprints too? i cannot deny that it is a human being, and therfore cannot condone an abortion. terminating another human being is murder.
i know woman have a difficult choice, but i still dont see how it justifies abortion. being pregnant doesnt mean you have to raise the child. and plus, there are a TON of complications and sicknesses you can get.....why would they want to deal with that? and chances for breast cancer increase significantly.
there are so many alternatives.
i mean, make me understand if youd like.

Answer 9

I'm a Youth Sunday School Teacher and a nurse. I feel that we are suppose to act just like Jesus acts. We as Christians have become so judgmental without showing the unconditional love God has shown us. We are not to judge but to show the same love and mercy He shows to us. Hang in there and don't be too upset. These people have I feel have forgotten that we have all fallen short regarding sin. Now don't get me wrong I am against abortion just like the next Christian. You see it's how I respond is the key. I treat people as I want to be treated, with respect. Watch this movie and be blessed. God loves everyone, and once a person repents, God is just to forgive you and me. Accept it by faith and forgive yourself also, God already has. www.mayyoubeblessedmovie.com Take care and cheer up, you aren't the only one in the world who has sinned, I have too just like everyone else. Kina

Answer 10

I understand and sympathize with most of that, but

They have abortions because no one ever taught them in school about condoms, their football captain boyfriend pressured them to have sex, and now they're terrified that they won't be able to go to college, that they'll never be loved, that their parents will hate them.

This I don't agree with. This is not the baby's fault she was not educated or not strong enough to stand up for herself when faced with her boyfriend. That was her mistake. Her mistake, her consequence. Abortion shouldn't be available to people like that: it's the easy way out.

Example:
I don't know where you live, and it may be different there, but here the whores at my school have had upwards from 3 or 4 abortions. It's disgusting. They don't even care about their actions anymore: you think they would have learned the first time around.

And what is wrong with adoption for those people?

I agree with you however that they should not be treated so hatefully.