how do you keep a conversation going??????????????

Question

okay; well. im a really pretty type of girl. many guys like me- im a freshman. im popular at school. but suddenly i dont feel fit in with the other girls anymore because i have become TOOOO quiet for the past 3-5 months just randomly. now not many people talk to me.

i became really shy now and wierd because when someone is talking, i would join their convo but i can't keep it going and all eyes are on me when im finished with a sentence. then im left with nothing to say. its embarassing. or when im around the guy i like, we can only say 3 sentences to each other and its over. i cant say anymore cuz i suck at being socialable.

when i talk to someone i just met or dont know alot about. what conversation should i start with? like i need to know specifically how to say it because i dont want to out of the ble ask" do you like football?" and i know the guy does like futbol. i just dont know how to talk without making it sound random. help?

Answer 1

by talking

Answer 2

First of all, i'm sorry to say this hon but you have to get an EGO CHECK! Second of all, and i'll keep this short and sweet, you have to make a conversation about what YOU'RE interested about! You can land up scoring major friends points by just having a conversation about a certain tv show you like or a computer game.

Answer 3

Most people really like to talk about themselves, even if they won't admit it. So you could just ask them (if it fits into the conversation) "what do you think of ______?" Fill in the blank with whatever would suit the moment. or "what is your opinion of_________?" And hopefully they will say something you can latch onto to keep the conversational ball rolling.

It is so hard growing up! I remember those uncomfortable years so well! It gets easier as you get older. In the meantime, there are probably a lot of good books on the subject. Maybe one of them would give you some good tips.
Good luck!

Answer 4

okay darlin'. trust me I can relate!! In school I was the same, as soon as I was 14 I dyed my hair blonde for a modelling shoot and all of a sudden everyone started to take notice, I had a whole bunch of friends, all the guys started to pay me a lot of attention and I quickly became the most popular girl in my year level! At first I just ran with it all as it was very exciting and people were paying me so much attention, after a while I had cemented my place in the group but started to act like my old self again- a little shy, I too would find it hard to talk to people, as they would always stare at me, soon girls then started to get jealous and spread rumours about me coz I couldn't be "cool" in front of the guys, I knew that quickly I might get kicked out of the group. So I told myself "what can i lose? I am a good person and if people don't like me for who I am, then they aren't worth the effort!" This is how I would start a convo with someone I had just met....."hey, good 2 meet u! how do you know all these guys?" or "so how are you liking freshman year so far?" or "do you know of any good parties this weekend?" If you really concentrate and listen to what they say something will come back to you naturally and you'll be able to have a proper convo. A lot of the time with young girls they get nervous and concentrate more on what they look like, how they are standing or sounding rather than really listening to the person they are talking to and really putting input into the convo. If you are confident in yourself, it will really show through your speech, just hold your head up high and think these guys are no better then me! and don't let anyone intimidate you. these guys would be just as nervous and unsure as you- although they would never let you know it! So if you happen to say something stupid-- laugh at yourself or say "mmm so how bout that akward silence ha ha ha" and make a joke out of it. Remember that you should just be yourself, smile and have fun- these are the best years of your life!!!!! goodluck

Answer 5

You are at the age when people are insecure, overly consumed with fitting in and being cool, and creating cliques... From what you've written you aren't doing anything wrong. If people are paying attention to you they will be looking at you when you finish your comment. Now if they look at you and roll their eyes or make snide gestures, then they are not feeling you or what you've said and in that case, move on... they aren't your friends.

When talking to people for the first time, keep it simple. Name. Where you are from? Movies. TV. Music. Talk about what you know and it ok to talk about what you don't know - ask him/her to help you uunderstand - don't fake it and act like you do know! Particularly sports when it comes to guys. Make them feel smart and cool and like a "man" by explaining football or something to you. Example for football: "What does offside mean? I've heard that before and was wondering...."

No matter what though -try to be you. Eventually, you'll find true compatibility and friends and the conversation will keep going and going and going.....

Answer 6

Women are generally the best at talking that is because they can elaborate on ideas or topics where men stay just to the point.
To be able to keep talking you have to have something to say. The way you find something to say is to become interesting. To become interesting you need experience. And to get experience you need to be active.

So what I am saying is the more active your are the more interesting you become. People who stay home all day are not very interesting, and not balanced. You find this in teens that are on the computer too much, alone too much, or they watch too much TV or play games. You need qualtiy interaction with others regularly. And you need to read good non-fiction books. And if you watch TV make sure you watch shows that teach you something like Discovery Channel, CNN, C-Span, Oprah, The view, 20/20, dateline etc. These shows open up other worlds for you and topics can come up in everyday talking.

The next thing is that you need to work on your shyness. You need to become more self-confident and accepting of yourself. Public speaking helps a lot. Take a class. Read a book. Then practice. Make sure your self-esteem is great. Those with low self-esteem or self-image are not good talkers. They dont believe they have anything valid to say. Work on it. Work on your self-esteem. Remember God made all of us different and no one on this Earth is like you. Be proud of who you are. And if others dont like you or what you have to see make sure it is no big deal and that is there problem not yours.

Read this book: How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie. I took the class when i was in college and it helped to change my life. It gets you to open up and teaches you how to have quality conversations with others.

Good Luck

Answer 7

One thing I have learned by being in sales is that if you get stuck while in a conversation, ask the person a question about themself. People like talking about themself. If you ask questions about them, then they will talk. If you find anything in common, you can run from there. In my mine of work, I ask, where did you go to school (usually college)? Tell me about what you do?

Now at your age, you could ask questions like, I love those shoes, where did you get them? What did you think of the math test?

Answer 8

With girls, you could start a conversation with "Hey, I really like your necklace! Where'd you get it?" because it helps you be social AND it flatters the other person. If you zone out and they look at you expectantly, say something like "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. Lately I've just been really zoney" (or something). For guys, you could comment "I saw you take that shot yesterday; it was awesome" or even just a simple question, like "Did you get the homework at all?" Then you can continue to indulge that subject, like "Mrs. _______ never makes sense to me; it's so weird" even if he disagrees, everyone's entitled to difference.

Answer 9

i am freshmen too actually, and sometimes i have that problem too, but my best advice is to talk about ANYTHING! if you run out of sentences, say oh, do you have a lot of homeowork or oh, do you have that teacher because i heard she was..... and if you dont feel uncomfortable, just make an excuse to get away from that person. good luck :) youll be fine!!!

Answer 10

1st off u need to chill---its normal to experience this stuff---why do u think u changed? try asking questions to show ur interested in the other person----there are also natural lulls in any conversation and perhaps ur putting too much pressure upon urself to perfrom. good luck.

Answer 11

Keep talking. Guys dont actually listen anyway.