Need your help...what should i do. Find another or stick it out.?

Question

long story short since the end of Oct. my gf of almost 6 years has been telling me she doesn't feel the same way anymore and that she wants to break up. She will then change her mind and talk about marriage. She usually does this when i annoy her or do something wrong.

As of now we are together but I'm pretty sure she still "thinks" she wants to break up. She is feeling tough because i messed up in sept. and she threatened to break up. For the first time i begged her to stay. Ever since then she pulls this stunt. She did it another 4 times since then and each time instead of leaving i begged her. Now im in such a hole i have no power in the relationship.

My question is should i meet another girl then break up with her or should i break up with her first. I still love her but i can't handle losing her and being alone.

I am much better looking then her and i attract many girls. People always say to her how did you get him. I never rubbed it in her face. Now she takes me for granted

I love her but i can't afford to see her move on with her life while I'm thinking we are together. One day shes going to break up with me when she meets somebody and I'm going to be left flat on my face.

"Stillsexy" that is exactly what i mean!!

Last night i went out with her and the waitresses, 2 of them were starring and smiling. I did not smile back but shes see girls flirt with me she doesn't care. I go out with her and girls still come up to me, shes used to that, it wont work.

I am not full of myself im just saying the way things are. I have no one to impress here. If i am dishonest in my description then i will not get a proper response.

Sweetie doll i gave her a week break and on Friday night she called my phone a million times and left text messages. The nest day i called her and said i told you not to call unless you wanted to end the break she said sorry i missed you and i was crying. I said ok we will get back together. She then said i never want a break again i said ok the next week she came to me with the same b.s.!!!!

piscesram, yes i cheated on her but a while ago and that is over with. What i did wrong was tell her i cheated when i was mad at her i then told her i didn't that i lied. she believed me i think.

Answer 1

Question: do you still love her? If yes, sit down and talk to her. explain to her that, yes, you made a mistake, but if she is going to hold it over you for the rest of your life, then you will have to end things. Tell her that if she wants to continue together, then she needs to drop the "break up" act and treat you like a person.

If you want to another girl, end this relationship first. don't hang on to this girlfriend if you want/need another. It does you both a disservice and your new girlfriend may not trust you if she finds out you are dating her and still seeing the girl that will soon be your EX-girlfriend.

B-Cool and respect yourself and others

Answer 2

You can handle being alone if you have to. Come on, you surely have things you have wanted to do for a long time but couldn't because you were tied down. If things don't work out with her, you will have the chance to do those things. And before you know it, you will meet someone special.
My opinion is that if you want to date someone else, the mature thing to do would be to end the relationship with your girlfriend first.
It sounds like you two are at a point where you are just going through the same old motions trying to get an emotional charge that will sustain the relationship. Maybe some time apart isn't such a bad idea, even though it won't be easy at first.
Best wishes to you! I hope whatever you decide works out for you.

Answer 3

haha, poor boy. She loves you, she's probably haven't realized what she's doing to you yet. But she might know that you will beg her to stay, and that's why it's so easy for her to speak of such thing. She knows you won't let her leave you.
This is what you do, let her go! and then, she will stay. I promise you, if you let her go and not bother her for a week, she will come back to you in tears and beg you to take her back.
you know how I'm so confident? haha... I used to do the same thing to my ex boyfriend. Of course I wasn't playing him around or anything. It's just that I felt he wasn't good enough for me and I didn't feel satisfied to be with him all my life. So I always wanted to break up. The only reason I stayed with him was I couldn't handle the pain of seeing him in tears, and I didn't want to hurt him, so we brake up and got together so many times. Well, eventually he let it go, he was tired of this and we found out we weren't right for each other. so the best thing for you to do now is to see how much she loves you. If you let her go and she stays, then you won't worry about that again. If you let her go and she leaves,then let it go, because if she doesn't want to be with you, she will leave you eventually. The longer you're with her, the more you love her, the more pain it will be when she leaves you.
But I still think that let her go for a week, and if she doesn't call you, then you can call her, and just to say hi, if she says she misses you, you say you miss her too, and then she will beg you to be back with her again. Good plan?
good luck

Answer 4

My goodness, you're rather full of yourself...maybe you should do her a favor and leave before your head suffocates the both of you.
Aside from that, it's never the right thing to find someone else and THEN leave. I think you have the appropriate actions transposed. You say you "messed up", but you didn't say what it was that you did. Perhaps whatever it was is the reason she doesn't feel the same anymore.
It sounds like the relationship has deteriorated into a power struggle. The both of you need to move on, for your own sakes.

Answer 5

First of all I need to ask this. Did you cheat on her? Because that is something serious, if you have strong feelings for someone and you can't be without them like that you would never hurt them. I'm dead serious!!!! I feel like you really want to do anything you want, get away with it and she is suppose to just deal with it because YOU are such a stud!!!!! This is pathetic. You better not even think of looking for someone else while still with her. Oh, I wish I could call her and tell her to read this pathetic message. I'm going to tell her to dump you and hook her up with someone myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 6

the key to your relationship is: like you said , you lost all your power over her, once you do that you are pretty much out of luck, I'm not saying to give up yet, i think you guys can still work it out but is going to take some time to realize that you guys really love each other or for her to realize that she loves you and forgives you and can't live with out you, maybe you should take her up on it next time she says she wants to brake up tell her fine and turn the tables around and then see how quickly she stops saying that once she realizes she is going to loose you, is all about getting your power back over the relationship.Let her know you love her and care for her but if she wants to go , tell her to go,don't go and leave her for another girl !what are you crazy?!just try that and see what happens be strong stand on your own(women like strong man that don't fall apart) and don't beg! you are just giving her more power over you, if it works then she really loves you, if she leaves and doesn't look back then you are better off my friend, if you are as good looking as you say you are...then you will be fine...good luck.

Answer 7

i think you have a problem. she likes this new found power over you. and she's not likely to let go of it very easily. since you have no objections to a new girl, why don't you flirt around some (in front of her) and when she gets mad, just let her go.
If she truly loves you, she will stay. if she doesn't--let her go.
you cannot continue this way walking on pins and needles around her. it will wear you down and you will be very miserable.

Answer 8

dude, you should find a really hot chick and then break up with the one you have now! So, you're not alone! It's like you have a back-up plan before you break up.

Answer 9

I think that you should dump her and go out with another girl.

Answer 10

Dump her first.Then find another woman!