i need to write a welcome speech for my church
2007-01-12 10:45:25 · 7 answers · asked by msqueen_65 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Gods busy, can I help you?
2007-01-12 10:48:55 · answer #1 · answered by brisbane b 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't forget to mention that your church is place where admitted "sinners" (liars, thieves, perverts and all manner of social deviates) congregate and that the newcomers and their children will be expected to engage in ritual cannibalism and accept the teachings of a book that states the Earth is flat and rotates around the Sun, bats are birds and that you god thinks smashing babies on a cliff and sending bears to rip children apart is the height of amusement.
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2007-01-12 11:09:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
1. Don't ever write out pre-planned speeches, but rather speak form your heart.
2. Most churches today just don't have it, as far as I'm concerned. They have the right idea, but too much singing and stroking one another, ect.
2007-01-12 10:47:36 · answer #3 · answered by Joe C 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask everyone to stand up and put their right hand over their hearts. When you are sure that everyone has done that, tell them all they can sit down. Thay will be wondering what you are up to. Then tell them that no matter what else happens, they can leave having been uplifted with their hearts touched.
2007-01-12 10:49:54 · answer #4 · answered by cclleeoo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
"Greetings, Fellow Humans. Y'know, Jesus always said to love others and to not judge our brethren. So I think we should be tolerant of those different from us."
2007-01-12 10:48:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
welcome, sit down and shut up?
2007-01-12 10:49:35 · answer #6 · answered by bob j 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
welcome all, and please pass the tasty low-cal bread wafers.
2007-01-12 10:48:01 · answer #7 · answered by blahhblahhhblahahh 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋