In love with my best friend ... should I risk my friendship with him??

Question

I'm in my mid twenties and have been in love with my best friend for over 10 years. He and I have previously talked about a relationship (i.e. he asked twice and I said no twice :) ... hey, I was young). Now that we're both older and have better grounding I really want to give it a serious shot. He's had girlfriends in the past and I've had a couple of boyfriends, however whenever I really "think" I like someone, I always think of him OR he someway brings himself into the picture. Neither one of us have ever gotten too seriously involved with anyone we've been in a relationship with (i.e. we haven't made love with anyone - or with each other for that matter)...I guess I'm kind of a hopeless romantic and wanted to wait until marriage ~ preferably to my best friend. We've recently expressed how we feel about each other, however I was in a relationship at the time --- my best friend told me have fun, just don't get engaged...what does that mean and what should I do?? :) Thanks!!

Answer 1

there is almost no risk to your friendship unless one of you does something stupid like cheating on each other. If he's your best friend and you both really like each other you have a very good chance of making this relationship the one that lasts.

what he told you with your last relationship is an indication that he is willing to wait for you and let you do whatever it takes to get ready for a relationship with him. Basically, this is the best indication you could ever get that he really likes you and wants to make a relationship with you last and be something special.

If you go out with your best friend and the relationship fails, you can salvage the friendship so long as you remain open and honest (aka, don't do anything you wouldn't want done to your best friend). If you don't go out with him, you'll always wonder what if.

Answer 2

I think that if the both of you are having feelings for one another that is more then just friendship then you should get involved with each other. Because having a love & friendship together, that is the best type of relationship anyone could ever have.Here is a poem that I had written awhile back concerning Love & Friendship.

Love & Friendship,
Should Always Be Considered
To Be As One.

Especially
When You Are Seeking
That Devoted Friendship

With Someone

You Will Always Respect
And Most Passonately Love.

Communicating With One Another
Allows Your Love & Friendship
To Last Forever
And
Constantly Flow.

Because
This Beautiful Bond
That The Two Of You Share Together
Will Most
Definitely Continue
And
Everlastingly Grow.

Having
A Loyal Bond With One Another
Will Always Keep
Your Passionate
Love & Friendship
Ashore.

And
When You Are Also Bestfriends
The Love & Friendship
That You Have For One Another

Is A True & Beautiful
Blessing
From
Our Holiest Love
Above!

AMEN

Good Luck
&
God Bless!

Answer 3

I think it is time for the two of you to share your feelings with each other. What a wonderful way to have a relationship....the foundation of it is friendship not sex. Way to go. I think that you both want the same thing and you have certainly known each other a long time. I would recommend though that you take it slow...since you will be changing the game plan from friends to more than friends, actually date for awhile with that in mind. Then you can take it to the next step if that is what you both want.

Answer 4

No. a million assure to damage friendships: one chum turns into romantically attracted to the different. in case you actually care about this human being and favor them on your existence the perfect element you would possibly want to do is contain your self in something else till that appeal fades and is eliminated. in case you stick round and save nurturing the relationship you'd be in charge for dropping your chum. that's 100% guaranteed. there is not any desire for some outdoors outdoors probability they could be romantically attracted to you. you recognize they purely imagine of you as a chum. do not delude your self into considering being your self, being honest or exhibiting your genuine self is what it truly is about. you would possibly want to purely be doing this hoping the chum might want to sense the same way about you. Your causes might want to be egocentric and insincere. flow away for a lengthy time period and also you may stay acquaintances. you want time to allow flow and fasten to three different idea. which will be something which includes an pastime, occupation, shuttle, different acquaintances, a boyfriend, a close chum, a puppy, athletics, song, .....concentration on any type of healthful issues yet ignore about this chum being a accessible lover. pay interest to this. Or, you would possibly want to be obdurate and discover out how real it truly is at the same time as ending your friendship.

Answer 5

You say you have talked about getting in a more "serious" relationship. If this is how you both feel, i say go ahead. But be prepared for the aftermath. It is possible to remain friendly with someone you have dated.,but both parties have to want to maintain the friendship.

Answer 6

It's about time one of you two takes the first step!!!
Go for it!!
You are already over the hardest part of the relationship - being friends...now you get to the point where you get to touch and hold him, too!!!

Answer 7

Friends become lovers all the time. I think its a perfect match. Now don't go get engaged and spoil everything.

Answer 8

i think you should tell him. He may like you to, it seems like he does! And 10 years is long enough. I think you should tell him. And if he doesn't like you back, if he is really a good friend, then he should understand, and you will go back to being friends in no time. Good Luck!

Answer 9

What r u doin people wait there whole lives 4 this and u r throwin it away I would say propose now lol.

Answer 10

Have a try.... the friendship might be strong enough to survive it, or it might not need to as it may work. I'd take the risk, it seems as if it could work. BUt you have to determine if you are willing to take it.