strict hindu mother who still sees me as an unprotected child. I'm 18 and want to move out to live with my bf. he is muslim and mum is islamophobic!!! she is even too strict to let me have a bf.
2007-01-12 05:14:00 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Honey, nobody can forbid you to have a boy friend or to move out. You´re full of age.
I understand you, you don´t want to loose the good relationship with your mum, but you only have two choices:
1. Go on living with your mum and split up with your boy friend = so mum is happy and you feel miserable.
2. Move together with your boy friend and live your own life = Mum will be angry - BUT: Remember always, that parents love their children and sometimes they even overprotect them. (like in your case), give her time enough to accept the new situation. She will, don´t worry.
She should meet your boy friend, so she might be able to learn a little bit more about "Muslims" - not just the rubbish that the cheap magazines write.
What happens in the western world nowadays? All Muslims are the enemy nº 1 or what??
be strong and stand to your love. Your mum will accept the situation sooner as you believe!!
2007-01-12 06:18:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anita P 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hi. It is a very difficult situation. Legally you can do as you please but please think about it for a minute. Speaking for myself, I know I have changed a lot since I was 18 and there was still a lot I needed to go through before I was ready to make a decision like that. Cos you must be prepared for being disowned. I mean prepared emotionally, financially, everything. You will be hated for bringing disrespect to your family. I'm not saying this is right but it is very likely what will happen and if you are prepared for it then go ahead.
The other thing is, what about this guy. How serious is he....are you sure you're not just a bit of fun for a while before he decides that actually he doesnt want to hurt mummy and daddy, dumps you and marries a Muslim girl? And if he is serious, will the two of you manage financially? And even if he does mean well, there is no guarantee that the two of you will work out. You have to be prepared to face being alone and without a family to turn to.
I'm not trying to be a spoilsport, and maybe you've already thought about these things. If you have both thought about it and are genuinely prepared for the consequences, and are ready to make the move than go for it.
With regards to how to tell your mum, I would be open with her, try not to get defensive, explain that you've thought about it. You would love her to be happy with your choice. Give her time to come to terms with it. If she refuses point blank, then you just have to say that you would prefer to stay on good terms, but that you feel it is the right thing for you to do.
Dont rush into anything, take your time, you are still young and I dont want you to regret such a drastic decision. If you do make it, make it for the right reasons, and not just to escape from home. Good luck, warm blessings. x
2007-01-12 08:20:42 · answer #2 · answered by teary chocolate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your Mother is obvioulsy very traditional and no matter what she isn't going to be happy about this. If she doesn't know you have a boyfriend how well do you really know this boy that you want to live with - I suggest you wait awhile ...
2007-01-12 06:01:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are 18...just tell her..she will be upset at first and then she will be fine...its not fair what she is doing to you.
2007-01-12 06:50:39 · answer #4 · answered by fajita 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure this is the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with. Because it sounds like she will probably never speak to you again.
2007-01-12 05:22:13 · answer #5 · answered by jjsmom 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
you are 18.. and adult in the eyes of the law. if you want to move out, just do it. she cant stop you.
2007-01-12 05:21:59 · answer #6 · answered by jeneric803 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your 18 just tell her you want too live your life.
2007-01-12 05:18:05 · answer #7 · answered by MANC & PROUD 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
WHY DON'T YOU TRY.... HMMM MUM I'M MOVING OUT I STILL LOVE YOU AND I'LL COME AND VISIT ALL THE TIME BUT I'M NOT A BABY ANYMORE AND I WANT TO SPREAD MY WINGS
2007-01-12 05:41:16 · answer #8 · answered by nat 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She is not going to be happy whenever you move out.....so...might was well take the bull by the horns and give it to her striaght.
2007-01-12 05:56:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just move out and tell them after you have moved that way they can't throw you out
2007-01-12 05:17:44 · answer #10 · answered by multibite 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋