I've had a couple rocky relationships. I have since found the man of my dreams, love of my life. We have had some rocky times, I feel they are much more important the he. We have since become engaged and are planning an amazing time together getting married. Is there a way to stop wondering if things are still happening behind my back?
2007-01-12 05:08:45 · 15 answers · asked by Katie N 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Yes and you must. Get counseling. You have some uneeded baggage and it will impede healthy relationships.
2007-01-12 05:12:13 · answer #1 · answered by Shayna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. It's human nature to be suspicious, especially after experiencing something bad many times. It's good that you are now extra cautious, because who knows it may happen again. But now that you have learned from your past, use the knowledge as a tool to find solution when needed. You now know what to do to solve the problem or most likely prevent it, since experience has taught you the signs. Most people find out too late but your experience will help you a lot in your current relationship (and future), that is if you really want to use it and make it work.
2007-01-12 13:20:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem. My husband and I are married with three kids though and I still wonder. I have no trust in men at all. I love my husband very much and he hasn't done anything that would make me think otherwise. I just keep going back to when I was younger and I would hook up with someone to find that they were married/taken...and their wives didn't know. It's like okay it makes me wonder how they were so secretive enough to pull that off....and if my husband would /could do the same.....? It's just sad how the world is today....no morals...You really can't hold back your curiousity though...it's just how you feel and you can't really change it. I thought by now I would be okay and trust him 100% unfortunately that's not true. I try very hard though. Just put your faith in him
2007-01-12 13:15:50 · answer #3 · answered by Jennifer W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only advice i can give you is, if you cannot fully trust someone, you should never marry them. I think you should talk to your fiance about this problem and get his advice and help. Let him know why you feel the way you do and address the issues at hand. Maybe seek a marriage counselor too. Most churches offer the service for a small price and it only helps settle any future disputes. If your fiance loves you, then he will understand and want nothing more than to help you through this.
2007-01-12 13:15:22 · answer #4 · answered by tiggy198077 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No there isn't i have been in some bad relationships, and you know what you never quit worrying if you don't let yourself. I noticed that evetually I started being ok when kyle was out all night, or when he was around certain people. I started to settle down and realize that I wasn't going to lose him. And the more comfortable i got the more he cuddled me, told me he loved me and was amazing to me.
Then the next thing I knew he proposed. In order to stop worring about him you need to trust in the love of the two of you. The best advise my mom told me was to chose my battles, so i started biting my tongue when he went out (which isn't often without me) and stopped asking him a million questions about who what where when and why. And that was when he just starting offering the who what when and so on.
Trust in love and if he hasn't ever given you reason to question then it will be ok.
2007-01-12 13:39:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your instinct is not to trust, it's best not to get married. That instinct will not go away just because you have a ring on your finger. Try to figure out what went wrong in your previous relationships. Make sure you are not making the same mistakes again.
2007-01-12 13:17:42 · answer #6 · answered by lynda_is 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From experience, when trust has been violated it takes awhile for you to gain your confidence in it not happening again. Take your time, give yourself a break and realize that open communication with your new man is essential...talk to him about it, and how things make you feel so he understands where you are coming from....Best of luck!
2007-01-12 13:12:31 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a little faith in the one that you love. You can't compare him to someone from your past. How can he compete against something he doesn't even understand. New man, new life.
2007-01-12 13:12:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is a man and all of us men cheat and lie so stop wondering and just accept the facts
2007-01-12 13:14:15 · answer #9 · answered by irishlad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let it go...you can't change the past or predict the future. Dont take the baggage into your marriage.
2007-01-12 13:12:27 · answer #10 · answered by Ŗεŋεε 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋