What do you think is the most effective way to discourage teenagers.....?

Question

from chosing to or by chance having babies without completely terrifying them about the aspects of parenthood?

The reason I ask this is because I have seen a magnitude of ways people try to prevent this but most seem overly aggressive and was wondering what others opinions are.

Answer 1

I plan on telling my children the truth. I had all 3 sons before I was 21 and my eldest attended my high school graduation (very proud moment for me since I have known girls who just dropped out). I recall in school they tried to scare us into not wanting to have babies, they would tell us how time consuming they are, about how messy they can be, they don't always smell good, about everything we had to give up to take care of them, about how the father might not want to step up and do his part, etc. Not once did they go over the effects on the poor baby. I never minded not being able to buy something for myself because my baby needed something or even if it was just something one of them wanted as they got older. It didn't bother me that for the most part I had to be a single parent. It didn't bother me that sometimes they smelled not so pleasant (a bath does wonders, even as a teen mom I knew that), and I would never in a million years give up the time they took up and still (when they are interested in what I have to say) take up. As a matter of fact, it's just the opposite, right now my two oldest are too old for kisses and hugs in public, are too old to be tucked in and have story time, and in general feel they are getting too old for mommy.
To be completely honest, all of the discomfort the schools go on about as well as most parents could happen to a 13 or 14 year old child or to an fully grown adult. All of what they discribed could be take any way at any age.
I guess all of that wouldn't make the decision on having a baby at a young age seem all that bad, heck, I won't even be 40 when my baby graduates, but what I have to say next might.
What destroys me about having had my children at such a young age is the fact I didn't get my life together before I had them and it's not a concern I have for myself that bothers me. Last year my son was picked on because his socks were too high so I had to scrape together all the change I had to buy him lower cut socks. He was then picked on for being to poor to afford socks because they were too short. I had no more change to buy him the socks that would make his life easier in school. That's not the only time I couldn't get my children something they needed or wanted. I'm not saying I want to be rich to buy them everything, but I wish I had gotten things taken care of before I had children just to have the option to. For the most part of my children's lives we have lived in a housing development. My children have been scorned for this not only by peers but adults as well. Not directly by adults but they have ears and can here the remarks said to me and they feel responsible for our situation. No amount of reassurance can take away the pain they feel and it destroys me.
What I tell my children is wait until you know you can take care of them because listening to your child cry himself to sleep because of the cruelness of others is the worst thing in the world to have to listen to.

Answer 2

I think being overly aggressive can push them into doing the very thing the parents are trying to prevent. This is from experience and watching friends who had overly protective parents. Now she's a single mom. My parents were protective, but they were also very open with me without being too detailed and frightening. I think parents just have to be honest, pay attention to what their kids are doing and have some type of checks and balances.

Answer 3

A deterent for my daughter was not infact planned as a dterent.
When she was fifteen or so she used to have terrible trouble getting up in the morning, for love nor money i could not get her out of bed for school.
Along with a strict bedtime of 9.30pm, we decided to impose a weekend punushment on her. My now 3yr old son was only a few weeks old at the time and was prone to waking at all hours of the night. At the weekend we used to move Noah's crib into her room and she had to get up and feed him during the night.
It served at a great incentive to get up in the morning and after one sleepless weekend she said."mom there is no way I'm running the risk of having a baby when there is nobody else to help out".
Sho only recently lost her virginity to her boyfriend of 2yrs.....I am not by any means happy about it but I have to be realistic she is a hell of a lot more responsible to be loosing now than two or three yrs ago but I also know that she is currently very careful.
communication is a big thing they need to be able to talk to you about sex and contraception.

Answer 4

fortunate i'm that i did not taught my 2 sons tochronic. My ex spouse did,... My youngest son is in effortless words 11 years previous so i'm good to flow with that. in any case, utilising is not in simple terms following the line. the most important is understanding the function (handling) of the motor vehicle itself and familiarize the drivers proper of way. customarily that is what the precedence that i should be conscious with the kind of large quantity of drivers, youthful and former. also timing is important (passing, yield to the left or proper). In different words, make confident that the driving force is known with precisely what he's doing. also, a large number of youthful inept drivers that want to exhibit off when they get their let or driving force license. Very risky. it really is one reason some youthful drivers were given their violations (recless utilising and injuries). Edit: nicely, lengthy previous are the days once you imagine that each thing is over for you, yet heritage repeat itself. So once again your youthful years (ideas) will crosses that direction to relive that journey, and someone has to do it,lol. practice utilising for the time of Sundays at the same time as highway replaced into not so congested, then try the busy highway at the same time as he's already confident sufficient, and were given used with the site visitors flow. each thing is going to be okay. good success to you...

Answer 5

When I was in high school, I was part of a scholarship program, well the had us come in a watch a video about sex, but forgot to mention that is was about STD and the effects it has on your body, but also what it does to the unborn baby is you end up pregnant. It was the most horrible video I had ever seen. Needless to say I was scared to death

Answer 6

For a girl I would definitely show her a video of a woman giving birth- The WHOLE thing- with the baby coming out and everything. That kept me from having a baby until I was 30!! No kidding!

Answer 7

WEll in college I took a class in college that gave average stats on how much it costs to raise a child over 18 years, like half a mill! that scared me from it! have them babysit an awful kid! Really, I think that learning from first hadn experience dealing wiht a kid could be the best way to keep them from having their own!

Answer 8

I plan to give my daughter "vitamin" shots every three months once she's old enough.

This will be depo provera, of course. That way, she doesn't know she's protected from pregnancy, so hopefully she'll still use condoms and be protected from STDs.

Honestly, I expect 16 and 17 year old kids to have sex. I did! I just hope I do my job well enough to encourage them to make good decisions about it. I don't want to see my kids end up with life-long consequences (and possibly death sentences) simply because of their hormones.

Answer 9

Be a better parent by staying home with the kids.

Answer 10

everyone is acting like you have to help them phsycologically, you don't .. let them take care of a baby for 24 hours and it will do the trick..