I have a sister in law who has major problems. She has been involved with drugs, is a pathalogical liar, would call people in the family to ask for help and then had an excuse for not taking it. This summer she faked a suicide attempt, then wouldn't stay in treatment, and has been at my Mother in law's house ever since. She doesn't get out of bed and my MIL takes care of her in every way. In addition to working a full-time job, she goes home to cook for her, and pays her credit card bills! SIL is 35 years old and refuses to leave the house, unless it is for a weekend trip to see her old boyfriend, or a day of shopping. But she can't go do anything to help herself because she is afraid of the boogey man. I am of the opinion that she is faking it because she doesn't want to deal with life, but in any case, I don't feel comfortable having her around my 7 year old, and really don't want her around the baby that is due in June. Can I be ugly and refuse for her to see my baby?
2007-01-12 03:35:45 · 13 answers · asked by An Inconvenient Thinker 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I don't think it is ugly, I would not want a MENTALLY UNSTABLE person around my kid or baby.
So long as she is pretending to be mentally unstable she should suffer the consequences
2007-01-12 03:39:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would and do have supervised visits. Sometimes people like this need to see how this world and family is suppose to be. Your children need you but this person may need your kids .My children always and everytime come first. Alot of times my children will just show up for a few minutes to bring their crafts or treats they made and I say we love you or we care Kindness from kids always warms anyone's soul. I now have a 13 year old who understand unconditional love. You can be ugly but you also can be kind.
2007-01-12 05:43:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do expect this woman to do, jump out and attack your children? Do you think that one look from her will poison your child in some way?
Just tell your MIL that you would welcome her to visit your children at your house. You don't have to make a big issue of it. If your SIL comes to your house, you can welcome her - just don't offer the baby up to be held.
I grew up around a schizophrenic aunt and I lived to tell the tale. You may not like this woman but she will not harm your children.
How does your husband feel about it?
2007-01-12 03:45:43 · answer #3 · answered by kramerdnewf 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would discuss it w/ your hubby first and see how he feels, it is his sister and he is the one who has to deal w/ the family repercussions. But, as for your children, I would tend to agree w/ you about wanting that kind of influence around them. Maybe you and your hubby can come up w/ a compromise about when and where she can see the children. And, of course, NEVER alone.
2007-01-12 03:41:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be ugly, just cautious. I believe that if a certain family member is out of sorts they can't be around me because I don't want any bad vibes around me. You have every right to feel this way but don't be mean about it.
2007-01-12 04:34:01 · answer #5 · answered by uneekqamar2004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely and I don't think that makes you ugly I think that makes you a great mom...2 thumbs up for standing up and caring enough to keep her away until she can get her life in order
2007-01-12 03:45:10 · answer #6 · answered by workit 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to discuss it with your husband first and see what he thinks since it's his sister your talking about. He has a right to say who he wants his children to see as much as you do.
2007-01-12 03:44:13 · answer #7 · answered by Irish Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is definitely ok. It is your baby, you choice. If you don't feel comfortable allowing your children to be with ANYONE, you are free to make the choice for them. You are the parent. You have rights on your children.
2007-01-12 04:39:37 · answer #8 · answered by youngwoman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your child, it's your responsibility to protect them from anything you might see as potentially harmful to them.
Just be prepared to stand your ground. Someone who's that coddled is going to raise some hell or have it raised for them by your MIL.
2007-01-12 03:40:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a parent you can refuse to let anyone who you consider to be of bad influence and morals, be associated with your children
2007-01-12 03:47:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋