My nieghbor that just moved in about 4 mos ago, is now laying claim to one of my trash cans. Swears it is hers even tho they just started using it bout 3 wks ago.Last night we argued about it, very loudly. Now I dont really care about the trash can what I care about is the fact that someone is going to steal from me and lie to me to my face about it! I feel like if I let her get away w/ this I might as well just invite her in to my house and let her take whatever she wants. My hubby says I m just b n a drama queen c/ I wont let it go I disagree. In the meantime I really dont want to start nieghbor wars. I have always got along w/ my neighbors and have never had to deal w/ anything like this. What should I do?
2007-01-12 03:02:00 · 20 answers · asked by Miss B 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
We share a duplex
2007-01-12 03:16:13 · update #1
Okay, you've got a thief and a liar for a neighbor. That's good that she's shown her character so openly.
Now, show your character.
Give her the one she's laying claim to. Write a lovely message of:
~ My gift to you ~ welcome to the neighborhood ~
This way she's not "stealing" it from you and you've done a good deed for your neighbor - with a lovely message for her to see every time she puts the trash out!! ;-)
2007-01-12 03:13:26 · answer #1 · answered by ☼High☼Voltage☼Blonde☼ 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Bubba. The best way to deal with this kind of behaviour is to be kind.
It does sound annoying that your new neighbour is behaving in this way, but is it really worth letting the situation escalate into a neighbour dispute? If it goes on like this there could be a very unpleasant atmosphere, which is awful.
Turn the other cheek. Be straight with her but very pleasant. If she asks why you have bought a new trash can for her, you could say "Well it seemed like tere was a misunderstanding and its not worth falling out with a good neighbour over a trash can."
People can really get you down with thoughtless behaviour or being rude, but the way I look at it, that's their problem. They're the ones missing out. Don't let it spoil even five minutes of your day.
2007-01-12 11:17:56 · answer #2 · answered by Suzita 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your neighbor is petty and immature and you do not want to sink to her level. You're better than that and you know it. This is just not a big deal but it could become one if you escalate the situation.
Fortunately, this problem has a very easy solution. First, take a deep breath. Next, buy a new trash can or two, paint your last name and street # on them. Then congratulate yourself for choosing the mature response and be done with it.
Neighbors can become lifelong enemies over stupid control moves like this. It truly isn't worth the bad will and potential for retaliation, legal or otherwise, that it creates.
Take the high road and take care! Best of luck!
2007-01-12 11:20:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Go buy another can, mark it clearly with your house number and move on. Deep down inside, you both know it's yours. People are petty and sad. Turn it around and feel sorry for her, but don't contribute to the problem any further.
I'd also make a point of clearly marking anything else that could accidentally be mistaken as not yours.
2007-01-13 11:25:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are their other neighbors that know it's yours ? Does this new neighbor have a husband that you can approach? Just tell them you dont want to get off on the wrong foot, but you are sure you are right. Have you taken any photos outside , before they moved in, that may show the can in the background ? Ask her what prrof she has that it's hers. Then choose your battle. You can be like me, I moved in 15 years ago, and a neighbor who has a right of way to cross my property wanted me to move a woodpile off the right of way, even though it was not on the established driveway, I called a lawyer and researched the situation, and did not move it. I still do not speak to these neighbors, and have recently taken him to court for shooting my daughter's cat. Now, I am NOT suggesting that you call an attorney, however, you DO need to stand your ground, especially if you have proof of ownership. Then , AFTER you have proven it's yours, give it to her, and tell her its her 'welcome to the neighborhood gift', then go get yourself a newer, better one, put your name on it, take a picture of it, and save the receipt.
You might also want to ask her if she really wants to start out on the wrong foot with new neighbors. If you really dont want another loud confrontation, write a letter and hand it to her. Dont put it in her mailbox, you can be arrested if she chooses to press charges.
2007-01-12 11:29:11 · answer #5 · answered by QueenA 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't blame you for speaking your mind , nothing makes me madder than being taken advantage of . Your neighbor is acting like trash and knows full well it isn't there can . Put your name on the bottom where they can't see it and call the police on them and when they argue point out that it is marked with your name ! Also that they have stolen it from you , file charges if necessary don't let them get away with it.
2007-01-12 11:10:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Go out and buy a new trash can and put it in the spot where her trash can should be. You take the two older ones and let her have the new one. You will be heaping "coals of fire on her head" if you treat her better than she expects. She knows how to deal with a obstinate neighbor but she will have trouble handling a loving neighbor.
2007-01-12 11:08:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Let this one go but get some really bright paint and paint your house number in huge numbers on the side of all your bins, then there won't be any confusion AND you'll be sending a message to her that you won't let her get away with that sort of behavior again.
2007-01-12 13:57:57 · answer #8 · answered by Goose&Tonic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are correct, I too would argue with them about that also. I have a bad temper !!! I know that some will say, that its a trash can get over it, but its the principle, of it belongs to you and she knows that its yours, and yet they want to be As#holes about it. LOL because of my temper I would destroy the thing in front of them and then say, OK you can have it now, !!!! lol
I do not think that's the best thing to do, but I do say that you need to stand your ground, and not to be "run over " by someone new in your neighborhood
2007-01-12 11:12:37 · answer #9 · answered by madman 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Heck no ! Don't be a door mat. Take the trash can, write your name on it, then put a " No Trespassing " sign in your yard. When She brings her thieving, low life self onto your property, she's tresspassing. Call the cops and file a report. You need to add some discomfort to her life the way she has to yours. Go, girl !!!
2007-01-12 11:11:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋