My 9 year old is very smart, he is in G.A.T.E. and at the beginning of the school year he was in all the advanced classes. But he refused to do the work. all his teachers say the say thing, "Raistlin is the smartest kid in my class but he just wont do the work" I have punished like crazy and I just don’t know what else to do to get this child to do his work, all suggestions welcomed. .
2007-01-12 02:55:51 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
What does he say when you ask him why he won't do his work? He may only be 9 but he still has feelings. He may need understanding not punishment. It could be a myriad of reasons. How is he fitting in at school other than that? What is his home life like - hectic & unstable or pleasant & calm? Is he physically healthy? Is he worried about something? What is he doing other than homework? A second or third grader should be doing his homework at the kitchen table with you around (not doing it for him or hovering over him, but someplace within hollering distance if he has a question).
2007-01-12 03:13:23 · answer #1 · answered by Carolyn R 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was the smartest kid in class, maybe in school, but I was ADHD, still am at 49. that was my problem. Another problem was the the very basic nature of the work bored me. There is little to do about that except small classes in private schools.
If you can afford that option.
Avoid Christian schools that are part of Evangelical churches as their curriculum is not always that challenging and even if it is, comes with a rather narrow view of the real world. for this reason a fair number of these kids struggle with standardized tests. if you go this way, check out the curriculum objectively with others and on the internet etc. they are very good at selling their programs. Some are excellent, don't get me wrong, but you must be really careful.
Stick with Lutheran, Episcopal schools etc run by mainstream churches. Kids from these schools often score best on ACT's etc. Still, check out the curriculum carefully.
If you can't go that way, you might try going to school some if you can to help him stay on track.
Having him checked for ADHD (ADD) is a good idea either way. Start at your regular Dr.
I was ADHD in school, but back in the day it was not diagnosed. It can be overdiagnosed, but many of us have it. I still take Adderal for it today and it helps. i have focused well enough to obtain 4 degrees and w/o that to help, I probably would not have.
Best of luck
2007-01-12 04:09:26 · answer #2 · answered by rumbler_12 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, don't punish him or you will lose him . Second, change his school. I cannot sense if you are his mother or his father, but I think you write as if you are his mother. Unfortunately, you did not say anything about his father's involvement. If there is no father, or if there is a separation or divorce, that could account for a LOT of difficulty, especially for a son who is bright and sensitive. In that case, short term psychotherapy might do, as long as the therapist is kind, bright, and sensitive, and - in your case - a man. It is a little early (according to Freud's schedule!!) for it to matter to him, but there is an age when boys really want a strong, warm, masculine figure in their lives ... someone supportive who can assist.
It really is not a matter of discipline. It is a matter of his seeing that there is a worth to his studies... and if you need to take him to an art museum or something of the sort, he might see something that sparks his interest. We all need encouragement from time to time. Sometimes our spirits sag and we need cheering up. Be sure you make a nice day of it, no matter how impatient you feel for results. Sometimes it takes years for problems to be solved. So if you go to a museum. be sure you also go to lunch together, and buy something nice. Museums ususally have gift shops. Someone I know bought the most amusing sphere made of wires and beads that folded and unfolded in all sorts of directions ... it was an absolute jewel of a toy and she loved it ... a kid can find those things as a springboard..... In any case, do not make a big thing of it to your son. You may worry yourself into a corner, but do not let him know that. Just show him some love and care .... and an un wavering attention to his basic needs... nice clothes and good food and see that he has things for his room ... and be sure he feels welfome in his own house.. Get him to garden a little this Spring if that is possible ....
Hope you all will be fine
2007-01-12 03:23:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He could be bored we had the problem with my god child he refused to do the work when i kept asking him why he said he knew the stuff and the teacher was boring try talking to the school about placing him in another class or asking them to come up with better technique for teaching we ended up sending my god child to another school (public this time not private) and he started doing his work and even advanced a grade and he is about the same age as ur son (7) good luck!!!
2007-01-12 03:44:04 · answer #4 · answered by jj? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK he has been placed in these class's right?? Was he taken away from his friends?? Kids do the darnedest things when they are separated from their buddies--and maybe he is being teased by his old friends--by being in the SMART class--so in his mind he thinks if he doesn't do the work he will be put back into the regular class's and be one of the guys again--just a thought--who knows
2007-01-12 03:48:14 · answer #5 · answered by skizzle-d-wizzle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There may also be some problem that he's facing, something that is troubling him and he's not able/willing to verbalize (a class bully? Any problems at home that may be stressing him, like a separation or divorce, or death in the family?), which is NOT a psychological problem but an emotional problem that is REAL to HIM.
Or, he may find the teachers boring; some teachers do NOT inspire the desire to want to learn. Just because she's the "teacher" doesn't mean she's an educator, remember that.
Or, he may have visual problems (have his eyes checked) AND have his hearing checked; my best friend's oldest granddaughter was diagnosed as hearing impaired... and everyone thought she was simply ignoring them, yet she's always been an honor student since first grade!
Guess what? He may not feel energetic, so watch his diet and make sure that he's not leaving home in the morning with a "sugar high" (cereal loaded with sugar, for example, and milk which also contains its own sugars in the form of lactose) and then he is "crashing" in the classroom... (from my personal experience).
When was the last time he had a full physical exam? Does he take one-a-day vitamins? How about supplements? Speak with a dietitian, not just the doctor (who may not be a specialist in dietary needs of a child his age).
Of course, the problem may also be that he's become the class clown or he's trying to impress others with his bravado...?
Or, maybe he's missed out on some aspects of the lessons and he IS behind and it's like a puzzle with a few missing parts... he needs to go back and review the work to catch up, and he's afraid to admit this (been there, too, and I was considered a "gifted" child, and always way ahead of my age group... but my problem was my failing eyesight... had to surrender my art scholarship I earned at 12 years of age).
Too often the easiest way for adults to deal with "problematic" children "who refuse to learn" is to label them ("lazy," "slow," "ADHA" or whatever... "so let's take the easy way out and let's medicate!" and this stigma will follow him for the rest of his life and may affect his future employment opportunities) when the problem may be something very simple, a dietary imbalance... or a chemical imbalance in his system.
A good teacher, like those I had when I was a child of the 1950s, were like investigators or detectives that studied the situation and worked to figure out what the problem was with a child's inability to learn something... and they figured out a way to teach that child... and, please, remember that not all individuals learn the same (look up managerial learning styles). Teachers of the 1950s didn't have the resources and computers of today's' teachers...
I know my words may upset a few individuals in this forum but my concern is YOUR child's needs; I am currently tutoring a few graduate students (and I'm APPALLED at the very poor academic skills these individuals have... HOW could they have graduated from college and be teaching with these poor skills?)
SOMETHING has upset the proverbial cart, and it is up to the adults to find out what it is. Children, in my view, do not fail classes... teachers fail to be educators! It upsets me to see the kinds of individuals that are now in the educational field (too many deadbeats with political cronies... malfeasant and incompetent).
Too often, lazy or uncaring teachers of today (many can't read, write and speak Standard American English at a college-graduate LEVEL) blame parents for their own shortcomings because it's the easy way out of explaining why a child is having difficulties... but (a) parents don't necessarily go to college; (b) parents are not necessarily academic teachers; (c) parents did not take psychology courses (Introduction to Psychology, Childhood Psychology, Developmental Psychology, etc., Introduction to Pedagogy... etc); (d) parents did not do an Internship; nor, (e) do Student Teaching under a certified teacher with a Masters Degree; nor, (f) graduate with a degree in Education; and, (g) follow-up with a Masters Degree in Education; and (h) work alongside with an academic coach paid by the Education Department!
Someone MUST step up to the plate and find out what the problem is. He is a CHILD, and can still AND SHOULD be helped and molded. Seek out all of the available resources within the school that oftentimes parents are not told about (do not let them do a psychological evaluation... have this done on your own if that is one of your last recourses, so the SYSTEM won't have this record, which may follow him for the rest of his life and impair his employment and/or future higher education opportunities).
What you do or don't do may or will affect him for the rest of his life. Consider that (I'm on YOUR side). Deal with professionals and get professional results.
2007-01-12 03:35:31 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have you had him checked for ADD? Just because he is in GATE doesn't mean that it isnt possible that he has a learning problem. Also get his eyes checked. Another possibility he may be bored, and tuning out because of this. Sometimes really smart children have social and emotional problems ask your doctor.
2007-01-12 03:02:02 · answer #7 · answered by mom of twins 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think that he needs to find a way to make studying more entertaing. I was like that once and my french teacher gave me this package on how to make studying fun. It was really great. You can find more about fun studying tips if you just search it on google.
2007-01-12 03:01:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you see what has stop him from stop doing his work and maybe he gets bored and he needs to find ways to make it fun or maybe just because he was smart then maybe the work got hard on him you should ask him cause maybe when it got hard he just gave up. or not to be mean but whoop his ***.
2007-01-12 03:14:31 · answer #9 · answered by jasminwalker23 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Take away all of his things and have him earn them back by doing his work.
2007-01-12 03:07:22 · answer #10 · answered by zinntwinnies 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋