in any normal realtionship,I guess its ok beginning guys pay mostly..but what about now when its over nine months?should she at least offer sometimes?.
2007-01-12 02:44:10 · 20 answers · asked by jimmyl929 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You have kinda made your own bed here! She is just going with the flow, you always pay so she has always let you.
The simple solution is the same as the solution to most problems in a relationship.... communicate... you need to talk to her about it, being careful not to get into a row of course. Don't accuse her of being tight... just point out that you were generous at the start but that you maybe find it hard affording everything now.
There is the danger that she likes it like that a little too much, in which case you have no decent future if she just sees you as a cash cow.
If she loves you enough she'll start to go dutch on at least SOMETHING. If she won't you are probably better off finding someone new.
In future, don't paint yourself into a corner. The only guys that can pay for everything are the ones who are loaded or the ones who are up to their eyes in debt! So by all means buy dinner now and then but just step back and let her pay her own way for some stuff from day one.
2007-01-12 02:54:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to let her know that she has to pay for some things at least or things will get worse as time goes on. Imagine if things got more serious between the two of you and you's got a place together. You would have to pay the full mortgage or rent along with all the bills which would be totalyy unfair in this day and age. Women always demand equality so i think they should pay their way in life equally
2007-01-12 10:50:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it really bothers you then suggest it to her in a nice way that she might at least offer to pay sometimes. If she don't like the idea then you either keep paying or find another girlfriend and change things.
2007-01-12 10:49:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the money is the problem.Stop taking her and spending so much tell her you need to save money.If she wants to go out to movies and such she will have to chip in.
Other wise stay in cook watch TV.If you love each other it shouldn't matter where or how you spend time together as long as you are together.
But if it is or isn't and it is bothering you talk to her.After 9 months you should be able to talk.And if you can't talk at this point who pays is the least of your problems in the relationship.
2007-01-12 10:51:37 · answer #4 · answered by southernbell_1313 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems to me that she's stuck in the notion that letting a guy pay for everything gives him a sense of power. Now I'm convinced that it's just plain annoying. Just casually offer to split and see what she does.
2007-01-12 12:35:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's nice to pay occasionally but the rule should be always go dutch (50/50). If you pay for one date she should pay for the next.
2007-01-12 10:51:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take her out one night, when it comes time to pay. Say something like. Shoot I forgot my wallet in my other pants. See what she does. Or say you can't afford to pay for everything anymore. You feel that it is time she contributed to the relationship.
2007-01-12 10:51:14 · answer #7 · answered by george 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I probably wouldn't offer if you always pull out your money first. Just for once wait her out when its time to pay and see what happens.
2007-01-12 10:48:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
after 9 months the two of you shld be close enough where you shld be able to communicate w/one another and be honest - just keep it real w/her and yourself - dont be afraid to say what you feel - its not what you say its how you say it - ask yourself this, Why be in a relationship and not feel the comfort to communicate about such a thing?
2007-01-12 10:54:49 · answer #9 · answered by Ruby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you set it up this way, get over it you've put it in her head you always pay so it's going to stay like that you cant change it now
2007-01-12 10:47:28 · answer #10 · answered by Juleette 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋