This person is draining my energy? Tried ignoring her but that doesnt help.?

Question

She is my next door neighbor. It seems she always has something smart and hurtful to say to me every time i am in view of her. Even though she is like this i still try to be nice to her and speak when i see her but she is just a very cold and hurtful person. She uses people to get what she wants , and doesnt seem to care about any one else's feelings. I've tried ignoring her but that doesnt do any good. She just keeps right on doing it.I live with my mom because she is old and doesnt have anyone else to help her. But this probem has been getting sooo bad that i've acually thought of moving into my own apartment to get away from this girl. And no i 've never been mean or nasty towards her. I dont know why she says these hurtful things to me all the time. When it comes right down to it she doesnt have any respect or regards for any one.She just seems to hate everybody.And she will stop at nothing to get what she wants. Can anyone suggest anything that might help.. thanks

Is this considered harassment? And if so what can i do to stop her from speaking to me ever again..And what exactly is considered harassment by the law.

Answer 1

Why let this girl get to you? You have every right to live your life without having to make decisions based around her actions! What I would do if it bothers you so much is speak to her about it directly. Don't try and be all sweet and nice about it, just tell it to her straight. She might listen. If all else fails just remember, she is the one with the problem not you and what goes around comes around!

Answer 2

Give her something new to occupy her time - never ending lawn repair.

Find someone gutsy with balls and who likes a challange. When the b*t*h is definitely NOT HOME, use salt or any other grass killing elements and write something nasty in her yard, like B*T*C in 20 foot high letters. Her only option, after the grass dies and she finally notices, is to dig it up and replant (now the word B*T*C is in 20 foot high letters in dead grass, dirt, grass seed and straw). When the grass finally comes back, it will be greener than the rest. Only solution is to kill whole yard and replant from scratch.

If not possibe, fill balloons with weed killer and throw onto driveway near the grass, or on the porch. Eventually, she will have unexplained dead patches all over her yard. She will be curious as to where the broken balloon came from. She will find out soon enough ***TIP*** DO NOT THROW said balloons from your property! The landing and dispersal of said chemical will give indication of where the balloon came from.

Hell, throw a balloon in a different part of the yard once a week, That will keep her busy for months.

If you don't do it personally, it gives you the advantage of acting like a concerned neighbor, not feeling guilty. Maybe she will get the message.

After a few months, mail her a nasty note, unsigned of course, telling her what a c*nt she really is and that the grass is being sacrificed because of her bad relations in the neighborhood.

Happy lobbing :)

Answer 3

You are letting this woman win by letting her ruin your day possibly and your dwelling arrangements. You are giving her this power over yourself. Dont bother trying to be her friend that tactic does nothing for her. You dont need to sink to her level and be rude but you can confront her. Just say to her "whats the matter today? Same thing as yesterday? Or do you have some new misery in your life that makes you want to pour your misery down on someone else because you have so much to share?"

Or you can try saying "Oh such a pleasure to see you again...grumpy as always I see...Oh some things never change".


Or just tell her to piss off. What have you got to lose anyways really? Your either going to get pushed out of the neighborhood by her or else shunned by other neighbors what does it matter?

The next time she makes a rude remark stop look directly at her and say firmly "do not speak to me. I do not like you and I do not want to hear anything you have to say to me." and if that does not work next time say "you did not hear me the first time..do not speak to me its harassement, and if you continue to ignore my requests I will have you speak to my lawyer".
If that doesnt work pay a lawyer a small fee to get her off your back, it will be cheaper then having to move anyways.

Answer 4

You could speak frankly to her, and explain your feelings, and ask her to stop or to quit bothering you. That is a direct approach and it may or may not work.

Beyond that the best you can do is to remember that you love your mom and that you are making sacrifices to be with her and to help her and let that outweigh the discomfort of being around this neighbor.

Short of homicide I can't think of any sure way to stop her. You don't want to do homicide (or I certainly hope you don't) so your choice is to suffer through it or to move.

Sadly the world is full of unpleasant people. There is no guarantee that your next home won't have a neighbor as bad or worse.

I think you have shown great character and generosity and that God will reward you for that; God bless you and continue to do your good work.

And God won't mind if you mention to her that you are getting a bit tired of her attitude. It might not do any good other than to help you feel a little better about things.

Answer 5

I had similar problems, Just tell her that you would appreciate it if you two could say a polite hi as you cross each others paths but you have no desire to have any conversations with her. Then the next time she is rude, you will not feel bad if you just ignore her.

Chances are she has some mental problems and she will not change. You just need to learn to ignore her without feeling bad.

If she ever starts threatening you, call the police. They can get out of control when they learn you don't let them bother you. I ended up having to put my neighbor in the hospital after they went nuts and attacked me. Remember she is nuts and you need to take care of yourself. Hopefully she will just find another person to bother after you start to ignore her.

Answer 6

I get the sense that you're not giving the whole picture. You say that she "uses people" and that she "will stop at nothing to get what she wants". How do you know this about a neighbor? If you are involved with this person in any way, then you need to end it immediately. Inform her that she is leave you and your mother alone. If she continues, then call the police and they can cite her for harassment or disorderly conduct. Above all, END your association with her immediately.

Answer 7

Darlin'
Time for this garbage to end !!
You've done everything and beyond to be diplomatic and upright in this matter---and to what end ?? IS THIS WORKING FOR YOU ?? With certain people they will push until there is no place for you to back up to----SO---end it !!
You have a legal right to be where you are -- doing what you're doing-- and THAT'S all that matters here !! SO-- the very next time that this creep comes at you --- just turn the hell loose on her butt !!!
This can best be done by simply walking to the edge of your own property line and looking her straight in the eye and telling her--- Listen, you freaking pyscho, I have finally had the absolute fill of you AND your garbage --- and Here's the deal---keep your freaking face out of MY business here because Now I'm putting you on notice that I will deal with you in the most appropriate manner from here out--- whatever that manner happens to be-- but I will no long allow your attitudes and input ANY room in MY world at all---take care of YOURSELF and leave US the hell alone or LEARN !!!!
In most cases--- bullies will stop cold once the bullied stop being bullied !!!!

Answer 8

Actually this person hates herself most of all. She is very unhappy, and is taking it out on the world. Since you have tried to be nice and it isn't working, ignoring her is your best bet. If she persists in harassing you, you could pursue a court order to make her stop bothering you. It sounds extreme but your health may end up being affected by the stress, and who needs that? Your neighbor needs help, but unless you're a licensed therapist, I don't think you can help her. You might try to find out from her family if she has a mental health history (and it sounds to me as though she might). I wish you luck.

Answer 9

it seems he has bonded to you in a huge way. My husband's grandparents have a pair rat terriers, and the single is amazingly bonded to his grandmother. If Rodger even tries to kiss her (and he's an "ok" individual in accordance to the dogs), he will growl. He does not freak out, yet he of course does not like it. he's gotten relatively greater efficient in view that they have been given the recent dogs, yet he nonetheless is a sprint shielding of her. i might attempt the guidance classes with the ten-15 minute separation time and then purely efficient him whilst he's calm. once you're away for 2 weeks, he could have some concern adjusting, yet he ought to settle after some days. i might risk a wager that this may well be good for him, surely, even with the indisputable fact that i might verify there are human beings there to confirm he does not get detrimental if he's bored.

Answer 10

You can pray and ask God to bless her and move her on. But sometimes God puts people like this close to us to shape our character. You do not have to lie down and take a beating from her. The very next time she says something hurtful, confront her. For example, she might approach you and say, You know you might even be pretty if you cut that hair of yours." You might answer her by saying, "I like my hair long, and although you are entitled to your opinion, my comment is that you would have more friends, if you'd stop be so rude and directly insulting." Ask her for an apology right then and there, say, " I want you to apologize to me right now." If she will not do it, then tell her not to come back around until she comes back with an apology. If she apologies , then accept her apology, but don't let her insult you without reacting in this way. She'll finally get tired of apologizing and be nice or she'll stop seeking you out. When you pray daily, say in the name of Jesus I bind that hurtful spirit in _____
(her name). The Bible says that whatever we bind here on earth will be bound in heaven. Also read Ephesians 6:10-22. It says that we wrestle not against flesh and blood but against evil spirits and wickedness in high places. God bless you for taking care of your Mom.