I Hate My Dad?

Question

he pays 100%of his attention on my mistakes, 0% on my accomplishments. almost like he hopes i fail so he has a reason to hate me, i think he would be happier if i were dead.

Answer 1

Sounds like ur a teenager..parents do this all the time..ur best bet is 2 just talk to him about it, or ride it out until u turn 18..but mostly it's when ur in ur 20s..ur still riding it out..but he loves u..so u shouldn't hate him..it just sounds like he's pushing u 2 hard, that's all..try n talk 2 him about it, and if he doesn't want 2 listen, then sometimes u just gotta silently take it, but at the same time, start thinking for urself a little bit..my dad used 2 do this..i had good grades all the time..but it's a crying shame that i wasn't gettin those good grades for me..n it could be that he's trying to live his life through u..maybe it's something that he couldn't do as a child..u never know..but don't hate him..he loves u..he just has a way of taking it a bit 2 far..the older u get, the more u get used 2 it, and pretty soon u don't listen at all, because ur old enuff 2 make ur own decisions for urself..parents can only give u advice at the point..

Answer 2

I remember feeling a lot like that at one time. Your dad THINKS he's helping you. He THINKS he's teaching you and giving you guidance... somewhere down the line he lost track (or maybe never knew) that positive reinforcement works so much better! It's very sad for you. But I guarantee that you are wrong about his feelings toward you. He loves you... he just doesn't parent very well. Next time he starts... just sit quietly and look at him... listen to what he has to say and don't argue, even if it's very difficult. Then turn away. Walk out of the room (hold your head up!) and turn to look at him as you're leaving. You could even say something like, "do I do anything good, Dad? Do you have anything nice to say?" But if you can't then just leave the room. I'd bet that he wouldn't need more than two of those and he'll be coming to ask you what's going on. Then you'll have his undivided attention... tell him the truth about how you feel. Don't yell, don't scream, don't cry. Look him in the eye and tell him how you feel. I wish you luck.

Answer 3

How old is your dad? This must be how he was raised,... he doesn't know it any other way. He would benefit from a parenting class- big time, because nowadays parents are taught to ignore mistakes more (not all- most of all not the ones that endanger the child's life) and magnify the positive things- no matter how small. Buy a book and leave it in the bathroom- there's one called "How to Discipline with Love".... dang it I forgot the author's name- for a while it was my second Bible- I gave it to a friend..... or any other modern book about parenting from the library will do. Just leave them all over the place. One of today's parenting style is to praise in public and to correct in private- I bet he never heard about that one yet either. Make these teachings available to him through books.

Answer 4

Write your dad a letter. I know it sounds loopy, but just do it. Put your heart on that paper, you can even start by telling him how much you hate him and why. If there was a time he said or did something assholish, write it down and tell him that you thought that he was being assholish and that he is assholish a lot of the time. Give it to him and hopefully he realizes that hes driving his kid up the wall and relaxes. I'm 25 and have hated my dad for 90% of my life, but i would have saved a lot of energy if i had told him to quit making me feel like i wanna poke my eyes out. A chat or a shouting match about how he treated me wld have maybe made a difference a long time ago. It came last year and it made a hell of a difference but it wld hav mattered more when i was younger.

Answer 5

Have you tried pointine out to him that he is very critical of you and that you would appreciate some support and positive reinforcement for your accomplishments? Where is your mom in all this? I am sorry you feel so put down by your father- he may not realize that he is doing it.Try letting him know that you need him to be more positive and less negative and that you are better motivated by this. If that doesn't work, maybe you can go to family therapy to discuss how to better communicate as a family. If this is not an option, you will just have to grow a thicker skin and be proud of yourself for yourself and stop trying to prove yourself to him. Good luck.

Answer 6

Honestly i know that this probably hurts. but if that's what he does, maybe YOU should focus on your achievements. If you reach a goal do something nice for yourself, if you do a good job on something do the same thing. i know this probably sounds stupid but what really matters is what you think of your self. I would also suggest talking to him, calmly, no yelling or "bad tones". If he starts yelling still stay calm. i had this same problem for a while, with my mom, turns out she was just frustrated with my mistakes, to the point that they stood out over good things.
I really hope this helps and good luck.

Answer 7

sorry, sweetheart. sometimes adults have issues of their own that they unfairly take out on the people they should love the most... This situation actually has nothing to do with you & your father should be talked to about the way he makes you feel. Is your mother involved? Maybe you could sit down w/ them & express you feelings, or, go to your school counselor for help to communicate with your father. In any case, please try to remember that it is not your fault. Keep trying for YOURSELF, not anyone else. you deserve good things & I hope things get better for you. God bless & a BIG hug for you, angel :)

Answer 8

Hello, I know what you mean. Let me explain why: I had a dad from 0 to 15 years, and on all of those years I hate him even to kill him. There wasn’t a day that he strikes me even to kill me. I remember the times seeing myself in the floorboards bleeding, and with my eyes closed thinking you’ll pay for this one day. My mom left me when I was only 3 years, and never saw her again, I mean never again. At age 15 I abscond my country to USA, and I subsist in the states for almost 24 years. Any way to make things shorted, about 8 months ago I had to go to my country to upgrade all my documents (all were expired), and since I had to go to my country, I decided to go and take a glance for that sick mother that left me with a rapist f…..g father, (sorry my language). Yeah he raped my two sisters. Any way, I got there and my intentions were to see whom they were and forgive them for what they done to me. But I shouldn’t, I got so disillusioned that I promise never ever going back to my country. That mother that left me was an old ugly women, she didn’t felt sorry for what she done, and that sick father; you know what I wanted to smash up his face, I wanted to make him experience what I felt, I wanted him to get in his knees and ask me to forgive him. But I just look at his face and felt sorry for him like feeling sorry for a sick dog. Yeah my friend, who ever you might be, I know what you connote.

Answer 9

I hate my dad too. BUT mt dad has Never been around for me. ever. In fact he kidnapped me from mom when I was lil and held a shot gun to my head... sounds to me like your dad loves you compared to mine.

Answer 10

They do that, you will look back on it as being the best thing for the situation I am sure.