So I'm three months pregnant by a man that I have been friends with for ten years(i'm 23) he was my first highschool boyfriend. Anyway I have a boyfriend who is totally supportive and I love him so much(we're engaged) But i can't stop thinking about my childs father. He wants nothing to do with me but I cant help but love him. I think of him all the time because it's his baby im carrying. I'm in love with my fiancee but I don't know what to do. How do I stop thinking about my child's father? I
2007-01-11 16:35:11 · 20 answers · asked by tobeloved64 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Yes my fiancee knows it's not his child and he is 100 percent supportive.
2007-01-11 16:50:40 · update #1
You are lucky you have a supportive and understanding fiancee. I know for sure that i will never forget my first love, I think it is fine to think about the past and have him in your thoughts once and a while. You just have to remember that you cant live in your past, if you do, you will never have a future. If your fiancee is so supportive of you and this pregnancy then i suggest you let the past go and live on. Things never turn out the way that you want it to but it always happen for a reason. all i can say is good luck in whatever that you do....
2007-01-11 18:13:18 · answer #1 · answered by molly_tony 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's the bond of knowing you are carrying his child. You need to sit down and talk to you fiancee about your feelings so it doesnt damage either of your futures. If the father wants nothing to do with you, that should be efficient enough to know there is no future with him. Let the past be where it is at....the past and look forward to a future with your fiancee.....There are not many men in this world that would over look such an obsticle and still want to be with the woman...be grateful and let old feelings die. No matter what, he will always be a part of your life. You have been first mates and have a baby. but thats it..thats where you have to draw the line. Good Luck in your decision. I hope you make a fair one for you both and the child too!
2007-01-11 16:42:16 · answer #2 · answered by bunnicula 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need a new definition of FRIEND. If this guy knocked you up and then skipped out on you, that is not a friend and he is a terrible lover. The reason he hung out with you for so long is he was waiting to have sex with you, now that he got what he wanted he don't need you any more.
Do your fiancee know that the baby is not his? If he do and he is sticking with you, He is a lot better man then the Jerk who got you pregnant. So do him a favor stop thinking about the jerk who knocked you up (except for Child Support), and treat your boyfriend the way he should be treated. Like a really good man.
2007-01-11 16:45:02 · answer #3 · answered by Daddy Big Dawg 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
one question. Does your fiancee know that he is not the father and that this other guy is?? If not that is probably why you can't stop thinking about the other guy. You feel gulity that's why he keeps going through your head over and over again. If your fiancee does know he is not the father and the other guy is. You have a great fiancee for one. And for two the other guy was your first love, and first loves are always hard to get over. When you do get over him....since he is being such a jerk get child support and suck him dry for all he is worth. A guy shouldnt be mean to a pregnant chic!
2007-01-11 16:43:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk with a profesional councelor to sort this out. Are you sure old friend is the father? What kind of father is he if he wants nothing to do with his childs mother. Sounds like he was in this for the fun and doesn't want the responsibility. If you are not sure if you really want only your fiance don't mary him or you will ruin 3 lives at least. Do you have supportive family? Are you going to have DNA testing and have childs father pay support? Are you and fiance going to have Father have visitation rights? would he be willing to sign off all rights? If his name goes on the birth certificate he will have to be involved every time there is something to sign for like a passport and legal documents. Are Fathers parents goning to want rights to see their grandchild?Best to put father undisclosed. Good Luck and get some counceling so the future doesn't have to be so hard for all of you.
2007-01-11 16:49:04 · answer #5 · answered by bluebird 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I want to answer this by saying first that I am a stepfather as well as a father. I think that your fiancee is going to be your childs father, not your ex. A real father is the one that helps raise you. Any man can father a child, but a real man can raise it. I know that it must be hard for you to be going through this but. I am sure thta your fiancee will help you with anything he can
2007-01-11 16:47:37 · answer #6 · answered by Lord Darkfall 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm also 3months pregnant and know that your emotions are all over the place right now!
You need to put the babies needs ahead of your own, who is going to be there to love and support both you and your baby?
Also how can you LOVE someone that gets you pregnant and then wants nothing to do with you?
Also be careful that you don't push your fiance away by feeling this way about another man!
Good luck honey, i hope you make the right decision for you and your unborn child...
2007-01-11 17:25:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget about the baby's father if he doesn't want to be with you. Think about your fiance and decide if you really love him. You cannot make anyone love you just like you can't make yourself love anyone. Whatever you decide, you need to walk away from the ex. It is only natural that you feel like you love him because you are carrying his child. Talk to him about the baby and whether he is going to be there for his child. Then concentrate on your boyfriend. It sounds like he really cares for you if he is willing to still stick around when you are pregnant with another man's child. Good luck!
2007-01-11 16:46:33 · answer #8 · answered by 2boys mommy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are going through a lot of emotions right now....many that are not too logical.
stick to your fiancee because he is one in a million! when your baby is born and you are with your fiancee, you will forget the child's father as you really may not love him....it is the knowledge that you are carrying his baby that is causing all these emotions.
eventually, when you see your fiancee pick up your baby and love your baby, you will forget the other guy because in your mind your fiancee will be the one you would want your baby to have as his father......
you'll be fine....trust me!
2007-01-11 16:47:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you will always have a child to remind you of him. But to have a loving relationship the love has to go both ways. In this case three ways because of the baby. If he wants nothing to do with you than you have no choice but to accept that and move on. It is not about him anymore- it is about your child now. Your child's happiness also depends on your happiness.
2007-01-11 16:46:04 · answer #10 · answered by ~*gen*~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋