I'm 14, a year ago my relationship with my parents was destroyed. I made some mistakes, they were too harsh, I got extremely resentful. Today they say they are proud of me, love me and for months have been trying, unsuccessfully, to get me back. Now they came up w/ therapy. I'm sure it won't work, but anyway what can I expect from it?
2007-01-11 15:59:31 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well we know they love you and they keep trying. They don't have to. Expect the therapist to mediate the conversation and keep the group in a calm discussion. No one should gang up on anyone. If you have a good session, you should all learn something about yourselves, if you are open minded.
You sound so much like me when I was young. My parents were not trusting, very harsh Catholic and rarely gave me any praise. My friends wouldn't do anything with me, cuz they wouldn't let me stay out past 10pm. (they were afraid I would fall into drugs).
In resentment, I moved out a week after graduation and didn't begin to understand what parenting was like until I have my first child. At that time, I slowly began to understand their fears and desires for me. They began to understand my depression and my need for praise. A few years later after a healed relationship, my mom suddenly died of cancer.
I am very glad I made my peace with them. I hope that you all can get to that place someday too. God Bless.
2007-01-11 16:16:04 · answer #1 · answered by schmitty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Therapy is going to be hard at first because you are going to hear exactly what you don't want to hear, but it's part of it. You must be completely honest with the counselor and your parents. Give them a chance, if they're trying to change, let them. You must let go of your past and look to the future, you're only 14, don't become a statistic. Therapy won't work if you don't want it to, sounds like you don't want it to work and you're comming up with all the excuses of why it won't work. Your parents love you unconditionally, try loving them the same way. They are the only parents you've got. It sounds crazy, but what would you do if one day your parents were out together one evening and got into a very bad car accident, they were killed instantly, and then the phone rang at your house, it's the police department telling you that there has been an accident and both occupants were killed. You're probably thinking that could never happened to me, that's what a friend of my sisters' , now she has no parents, her last converstion with her mom was an argument.
Think about it.
2007-01-11 16:14:15 · answer #2 · answered by juanb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think of a therapist as a paid family friend or a coach in the sidelines. Therapists help guide and direct the messages between family members to avoid any misunderstandings.
You are 14 and too young to write your family off just yet. it sounds like both sides are willing to admit that mistakes were made. The therapists help make the transition easier for quicker healing.
Good Luck,
C-F
2007-01-11 16:06:57 · answer #3 · answered by Crispy_Frog 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication, which is the point of all therapy to get to the root of the problem, with a safe location and atmosphere to speak openly.
2007-01-11 16:04:30 · answer #4 · answered by JAN 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
therapy can be very useful in helping you be heard and understood with the help of a professional.your parents love you and miss you and want you in their lives give it a Chance it may be the best thing to happen
2007-01-11 16:03:11 · answer #5 · answered by resigned 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lose the attitude, realize that you and your parents are human, capable of mistakes and capable of forgiveness. You have to be open-minded which means taking responsibility for you actions and their consequences. If you go in thinking this sucks, it will. If you go in thinking I can learn more about myself and my parents, it can be rewarding.
2007-01-11 16:06:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋