My friends and I were walking and one of my gal friends said "Tim, honestly, why do you act mean and rude?" and I was like "what?". She's not the only one who said that. What's so mean and rude about asking straight-to-the-point, one-question-one-answer questions? I just asked, "Do you listen to mozart? 'cause you hum alot of mozart's work?" and "Why do you like trains? Do people call you Choo-Choo?"
2007-01-11 14:31:47 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I don't see anything wrong with the first part but the choo-choo thing is definitely a smart-*** comment. Sorta sad you aren't even aware of it. I think you can ask straight to the point questions but don't try to be smart or funny or sarcastic about it, that's often perceived wrong!
2007-01-11 23:52:57 · answer #1 · answered by Sheriam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the first part of your questions seen innocent enough. Theres no problem in asking a person if they like Mozart, its the second part because you hum the music that can be misinterpreted. it sounds as if your critisizing a persons habits. plus asking if people call a person choo choo is kinda inappropriate. If you are just curious ask someone wheather they like something or why do they like something. you don't need to elaborate on your question unless your asked why did you ask that question then you can tell they the reason for your questions.
2007-01-11 22:43:38 · answer #2 · answered by Mirage202001 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you are "straight to the point", "open" , "honest", "blunt" etc ?
Look anyone can be honest, easy-peasy. The smart thing is to know when NOT to be. Me? I would choose kindness over honesty any day. Have a feeling the old guy upstairs is more fond of "kind" than "honest", too. Sorry to be blunt about this but in my country we would call you a smart a***. Now that is being honest rather than kind, but right now you could do with a dose of your own straight talking !
2007-01-15 11:43:07 · answer #3 · answered by Lilliana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If other people are telling you that, then its time you examined your way of addressing people and determine if this is how you want to be seen for the rest of your life. While YOU might think its fine or perhaps funny, apparently there are others that don't think so and find you offensive. Right now you have friends, but if you continue with the same behavior, I wouldn't be surprised to find that soon you won't have any of any caliber.
2007-01-11 22:42:50 · answer #4 · answered by I_Love_Life! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have good intentions, but you're a little rough around the edges, and people are put off by it. Instead of asking if someone listens to Mozart, ask an open-ended question like: What kind of music do you like?
I think sometimes you are trying to be funny, but if no one's laughing, then you aren't funny. Stop being so sarcastic, and ask people questions that give them the opportunity to talk about themselves, like the one I gave you about music. When you ask people open-ended questions, it makes them feel like you are interested in them and that you care.
Your sense of humor may be a little bit off the beaten path, so tone it down. Not everyone understands your kind of humor, and you're doing yourself an injustice with it because people are offended by it sometimes.
Good luck.
2007-01-11 23:22:22 · answer #5 · answered by No Shortage 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sarcasm is NOT fun, or funny. Not a joke. Just a way to slip in and insult.
Smirkiness " " " " " " " "
RThis may seem fun to you but would you want your friends to turn the tables and start
Joyously insulting you and laughing afterwards. Being a SmartAss is not funny either, it just leaves space for a promotion to Full Time JERK.
If You Wanna STOP IT!, press your lips together next time you feel the urge. Wait 5 seconds, it will go away. If it comes back, REPEAT AS NEEDED.
You are hurting your friends feelings just to make yourself feel good and get a laugh.
You can go for the promotion or you can keep your friends.
Your friends already like you cause they are YOUR FRIENDS and if you are a good friend to them, YOU WILL STOP
2007-01-11 22:45:44 · answer #6 · answered by Babe 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
These don't seem like mean examples, but there must be something that triggers this response from people.I think there are things that you are asking that you havent mentioned that causes them to say this.
Being direct has a place, but it's not recommended all the time. Learn when the appropriate times to say things are. It's called tact. Just try to put yourself in someone else's position to be your guide.
2007-01-11 22:37:52 · answer #7 · answered by T-Bone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People often perceive a lack of social skills as deliberate rudeness; learn to make charming small talk.
2007-01-11 22:36:55 · answer #8 · answered by Mr. NoneofYourbusiness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never, I repeat never ask someone if they listen to Mozart! It's too much---NOOOOOOO! Just kidding. What you said didn't seem that rude to me.
2007-01-12 13:41:06 · answer #9 · answered by Kreutzer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Questions of "ethics" involve more important topics than whether one person is insulting to another person. Ethics usually involve choices -- like cheating on a test, being immoral, etc.
Being impolite is not an ethic.
Lifes
2007-01-11 22:41:28 · answer #10 · answered by Lifesnadir 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋