How to bring up the topic of oral with my bf?

Question

We have been dating for a year now, and when we first met, I told him I wasnt comfortable receiving oral (self-conscious), but I always gave oral to him and still do. Well, like I said that was a year ago, and our relationship is great. Now I want to try oral, so I brought up the topic, and he said we could try me receiving but it never happened ( MONTHS later). So I have hinted that to him recently, a few times, to try again, and he kinda ignored it and brushed it off. Well now I am thinking that maybe he doesnt want to give it anymore or he thinks he can get away with not giving, hoping I will just drop it. I know he has done it in the past, but I am so tired of bringing it up and then he never follows through. What do I say to him? I just want to try it, do guys really not like giving oral to a girl?

PS. Im very clean, so its not like I smell

Thanks

Answer 1

Sounds like he got spoiled. For a year, you gave but didn't ask him to reciprocate. Now that you're asking, it seems like he's being lazy. You say you've hinted about it. Maybe that's not enough. Sit him down and talk to him about it. Tell him exactly what you wrote here--how you felt about it a year ago and why you said what you did then, how you feel much more comfortable in your relationship now and trust him enough to try something new. If he still brushes you off, fine. Stop doing it for him. I guarantee you, after he goes for a while (and it probably won't be that long) without, he'll be begging you to let him pleasure you!

On the remote chance that even that doesn't work, ask yourself whether you just have a completely, selfish, self-absorbed boyfriend who is willing to give up a little of his own pleasure to avoid having to give you any.

By the way, you don't have to shave yourself bald, either. Neatly trimmed is just fine. I wonder about guys who only like a girl who is hairless down there. Do they want a woman or a 12-year-old girl? It's fun once in a while for novelty, but it shouldn't be a condition for getting oral. Good luck!

Answer 2

Haha...well just don't make it sound like a business proposition or life changing experience, just wait until you guys are already doing your thing and say something like "I'm feeling naughty tonight, so lick me down I'd love that".

If the guy still resists, tell him you get off the best when you do something new like that. If it still fails let him know "Hey, you do want to be the best, right? " and even stop giving him oral if he still doesn't respond a remind him, in kind of a joking way "You know, the salt is still down there when I do it to you...we should both give a little, right?"

And have fun!

Answer 3

Consider these options.
Quit hinting.
Tell him you have something very serious that you want to discuss with him when he is willing. It puts the ball in his court. Ask again if needed a few days later.
When he says he is ready to talk, tell him what you want straight up.

And/Or/Maybe 1st

While you're giving, get in a position that offers him the opportunity to give back.

Temp him by teasing yourself. Not many guys can handle that without wanting to join in. Perhaps you can control how he joins in in this situation.

If he resists you could come to the understanding that if he wont then you wont.

Not to doubt your hygiene but do be clean because that can be the difference between eagerly again and never again.

As far as guys in general enjoying cunnilingus it's simply some do and some don't.

(FYI, You giving is called fellatio)
Now, where's my wife! {;-)

Answer 4

You said you were self-conscious before, and if he doesn't want to do it, there's only one reason why...he thinks it's gross. Why would you want to put yourself in the position to see him grossed out by you? You'll be devastated. Tell him that you think he thinks you're disgusting and because of it, you're not only going to stop giving him head completely, not only until he does it for you, but when he's BEGGING you to let him give you oral! I would never want to force someone to do something to me that way, if someone ever forced me into it, I'd bite it off, so withholding until he gives in is not good enough. He's gotta WANT it. Maybe after 6 months of dying without blow jobs(unless he just plain goes and gets it elsewhere), he'll change his mind and stop being so selfish. But if he's grossed out by you for any reason(they say that when a guy doesn't like p us sy it's cause he's secretly attracted to men, not women) why the hell would you want to stay with him in the first place. He's going to do nothing but make you feel bad about your body and ruin your self-esteem. Gee, aren't SOME men just wonderful? NOT!

Answer 5

You sound young, even though you dont actually give your age. And you mention that you have good hygiene, so I can only conclude your boyfriend has found it is easier to let you service him, and not want to return the favor, apparently too much work.
Usually, if your not letting him lick your labia and more from the begining, dont expect the old dog to learn new tricks. If You REALLY want to stick it out with this man, and want to force the subject, the best thing you can do is try to SEDUCE him. Cater to your own fantasys a bit, but get him alone, and get him horny, and give him an ultimatem right then and there. Tell him: "If you want it it, then you better lick it" If THAT dont work, honey, I say you move on to new experiences, and move on. Good Luck!
Gee, I wish I could give you my email so I could help you more with your problem in case things dont work out, but uh, I have a feeling your going to be, allright. (wink)

Answer 6

Don't give him oral anymore. A relationship is a 2 way street in every way. If you have been giving so much, and he doesn't give any, then you should reevaluate your relationship. If he acts like this now, what do you think he'll be like when you have sex? He's never going to let you orgaism! AND, this can be signs that he won't be caring in other aspects of your relationship, not just sexual. I think you should talk to him, and stop giving him oral!

Answer 7

Oral on a girl is my favorite! I can do that and not need any other form of sexual gratification.
He is just trying to get away with it. He is under the impression that if he doesnt go down on you that you will still go down on him. Screw that. Tell him flat out "I want you to eat my pussy! if you don't I'm not sucking your dick anymore" that should get him.

Answer 8

This sounds very strange because any man that I have ever been with wants to do that to me. I think most men really like it. Well, I would stop doing for him until he starts doing for you. If he says something to you like why did you stop? Just say well you never reciprocated so I thought you didn't want me to do it to you either. I think he will get the message.

Answer 9

There may be some guys who don't like giving oral, but I can't understand them. I jokingly describe it as "first-person porn" -- I mean, it's all right there "in my face," literally, all five senses taking in the woman I love. It's somehow more intimate even than intercourse. I also love wrapping my arms around her hips and holding her close while I kiss her and drink her in. But that's because I know how wonderful it is. Your boyfriend has all this ahead of him...

What you need to do: the next time you're together and about to be intimate, take his hands and tell him you really want to know what it feels like to have him give it to you. If it suits your personality and your relationship, you can even take control and do a little teasing:

Have your boyfriend lie on his back. Turn so you're facing his feet, then put a knee on each side of his chest (with his arms over his head) and lower your hips down over his face. Don't touch him at first -- just brush his nose, his lips very gently, rocking from side to side. Then lower yourself down and let him taste you. He can use his hands to open you, position you so that he can touch your most sensitive spots with the soft wetness of his tongue. As you begin to respond to this, you can lean forward and do the same to him. As you excite him, he'll begin working more to excite you. It can be very, very satisfying for you both to finish this way, but it can also be satisfying to take a long time, bring each other to within a minute or two of climax and then finish each other quickly, furiously, uncontrollably. (Some of our most passionate climaxes happen when we spend 45 minutes on foreplay and three minutes on actual penetration... the trick is for us to get each other to where we're both three minutes from finishing, and then let all hell break loose. :-)

And don't worry about the smell. The smell and taste of a clean, healthy woman is incredibly exciting to a man who knows what it means. And because I have a mustache, the scent remains on me long after we finish. It's very exciting to get into the shower the next day, start to wash my face, and have the steam from the shower "reawaken" the scent of the previous night's love.

So that's it -- ask him straight out, tell him that seeing how much he enjoys it when you give it to him has made you curious to feel what it's like for you. And most of all, never doubt that you deserve it, you're worth it, and there should be nothing stopping him. If he has any reservations, talk to him about how exciting it is for you when you give it to him. It's probably not fair, after a year, for you to withhold oral from him until he gives it to you, but it's also not fair for him to withhold it from you at this point.

Answer 10

Sex is very important in a relationship -- not just having it but also doing things to please each other. If after trying to talk to him for what you consider a reasonable amount of time and nothing comes of it, maybe you should open yourself up to meeting other people. Then consider telling him:

TO THE LEFT, TO THE LEFT....
EVERYTHING YOU OWN IS IN A BOX TO THE LEFT

or

GET TO STEPPING BUSTER!!

or

HIT THE ROAD JACK, DON'T YOU COME BACK NO MORE NO MORE NO MORE NO MORE.