im 13 & I lost my daddy 2 cancer in march of '06 after fighting it for 3 years i cried the night he died but?

Question

i really want 2 cry sometimes but i cant, dont get me wrong i love to so much and of course i miss him but i just cant bring myself to cry and i really want to just to get everything out and i feel like i should be mouring more... whenever i think of him (which is pretty much all the time) i wanna cry, but i dont and when people bring up cancer, death, my dad, or even things that reminds me of him i try to put on a happy face and act like im not emotional about it. i miss him so much and i really wanna cry but i cant, has that ever happened to anyone?

Answer 1

Yes dear I am 27 more than twice your age and I have experienced emotions like these. There have been times when thngs have really hurt me and I have been unable to bring myself to tears. Life has its fair share of disappointments and once you face enough of them it can make your heart becme hard as a brick. But don't worry it will soften up again and you'll be capable of letting everything out that needs be. Sometimes we mourn in delay. But don't worry about the fact that you are not crying we all deal with grief differently. Tears streaming down your face is not the only thing that expresses that you miss your father. We know you miss him because you haven't forgotten him and you are telling all of us about him. Trust in God and you'll be alright.

Answer 2

Hey sweetie. My boyfriend lost his dad to cancer in february 06 after fighting for one year. He is 16. I was not happy to read your question because it is clearly unfortunate. But i was happy to read about someone similar to my boyfriend. he cried a lot the night he officially died. but after that he just turned it off. he didnt cry at the funeral, he didnt cry at anything. I was worried he would bottle it in and one day just burst, but it will be a year this february and nothing has happened yet. I have asked him about it and he doesn't understand it either. But i can assure you both there is nothing wrong with it. I do not know why exactly but I feel as though it has something to do with the death not being as sudden and shocking. Cancer is more of a process. It may have osmething to do with missing him so much, and knowing that crying can not possibly bring him back into your life. You will be okay and stay strong. It's so young to have this happen to you and its not fair but i promise everything will be okay. Your daddy is okay and in a better place. He misses you just like you miss him and you will see each other one day.

Answer 3

You know, the truth is that everyone handles death and mourning in their own way. It may not be that healthy that you don't deal with some of it upfront and honestly, but it may be the only way you can keep it together. One day you will cry, but whatever the case, you are doing it your way and the best way you know how. Your Dad knows and knew that you loved him, and that's the important part. AND, your Dad would probably not want you crying all the time anyway. My Dad died about a year and half ago, and he was always telling me, just keep on smiling. That's what he wanted, and he knew life was crap sometimes, but he always admired when I could put a smile on my face and look for the positive. You are just fine, don't beat yourself up.

Answer 4

Have I ever felt like crying and couldn't? yes. Believe me, it will come, possibly at a really odd time.

I hope you're not holding back for fear of making people uncomfortable. Because too bad for them, you have the right to cry

I'm really, really sorry for your loss. I'm so sorry you didn't have more time with him.

Everyone mourns in a different way. Some busy themselves, some abuse themselves, some withdraw from their loved ones. Some try and make some sense out of what's happend. Some become doctors and try to find the cure.

Barnes & Noble have a number of books that could help you get some perspective on what you're feeling. So would the public library.

Good luck.

Answer 5

I was 21 when my daddy died of heart disease. I didn't cry either. My mother fell completely apart and I had to stay strong and make all the arraingements and such. Same as when my MIL died. Everybody was leaning on me and I just didn't feel like crying. Then later on, Both times, after everything had died down (a couple of years later), I just broke down and had a good cry. So I guess what I'm saying is don't worry, everyone handles grief in a different way.

Answer 6

Everyone mourns in different ways. Just make sure if you need help to talk to the ones that are close to you. Don't bottlle things up inside. Three years to battle cancer, and then dealing with your father's death must have been really hard. Don't be afraid to cry. You sound like a strong person, but don't be afraid to lean on other people.

Answer 7

I am sorry for your loss! In my life, and it is much longer than 13 years, I have learned that you must cry, it should be one of the comandments. Scream at the top of your lungs!! If you keep all the pain bottled in, it will find its way out one day. It won't be pretty when does either. So go to the top of a hill and scream or under your pillow and yell and hit your teddy bear and ask why and then just cry until you begin to laugh at all the fun wonderful memories you have of your Daddy!

good luck and God Bless you

Answer 8

Im really sorry to hear that hun. Thats terrible. U should tell ur mother how ur feeling. Sometimes just talking about the person u lost and saying how much u miss and love them makes u feel better. You'll obviously never get over losing ur dad, but i hope u do start to feel better about it soon. Look on the bright side, he's not suffering or in any pain now.

Answer 9

Yes sweetie-I'm an adult and did the same thing when my little brother got killed a few years back. It's kinda like your body protecting itself-like if you block something out,so you don't have to deal with it. Don't worry honey-things will change for you and you will eventually mourn when you least expect it-and when it does happen-just let yourself go and cry as hard as want to get it all out! Your normal! Trust me!!! Take care sweetheart,and I'm very sorry for your loss-but I'm sure your daddy is still with you,and probably very proud!

Answer 10

Yes, this has happened to me. When my father passed on I was 30 years old. I was the closest to him of all his 10 children. It wasnt until 3 years later that I finally cried. And it was devastating. During all that time, the reason I did not cry was because he would always tell his friends how STRONG I was. So smart and strong. So, when he passed on, I vowed to be strong for all my family. To the detriment of myself. So , please you should really see someone about this.. It will be much easier to deal with these feelings now, instead of keeping them pent up inside. Once you have released, you will be able to begin the mourning process.