i cant break up with him in person. he's aggresive and im terrified, plus i think i can get all the words outline...
he's a great guy....but i need to break up with him. were many years apart, im a lot less experienced and i feel uncomfortable. so online it is??? i mean, he asked me out online so not to say its even, but its a bit the same.
no idea what to do or how to break up with a nice guy!!!
HHEELLLPP!!!
2007-01-11 11:58:16 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If he's aggressive and you're terrified, then he's not a great guy.
It doesn't matter how you dump him.....just do it.
2007-01-11 12:04:24 · answer #1 · answered by anthrotistic 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you look up the word Aggressive in the dictionary, you don't find the words nice guy in the meaning. If he is aggressive with you, then I would suggest you do break up with him through a written letter. This is more personal, than on line. And this way you can still write down all your feelings. They used to call this a Dear John Letter. It is not nice to receive a letter like this, but it works. Just first tell him that you did really care about him, but it just did not work out. Slowly break the bad news to him.
Guys need to feel they were not such a bad guy, before you tell them it is over. Believe me, been there, done that. This way they don't get all explosive with you. Especially if he is aggressive.
When I wrote a guy a letter, telling why we could not be together, he got really sad, that he even cried. It broke my heart to see that I hurt him this way, but I just did not feel the same way that he did. He was too possessive with me, and we only liked each other. At least on my part. What he said, that he appreciated, was that I told him he had alot to offer another girl. Like his kind heart, his always opening the door for people. The fact that he was an artist, and I liked his work.
Because he had some self respect left, and I didn't down grade him, this helped calm him down. I was sitting not to far away from him when he was reading the letter. I was so nervous. But when it was over, and we calmly talked later that week, we actually stayed friends. I hope I have been of little help to you.
I also hope it works out well for you.
2007-01-11 12:25:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even if he just asked you out online it still not good to break up with him online. It's really mean. I know what you mean and I experienced that before so I also broke up with that guy.
I think the best way is to see and talk with him in a place where there are lots of people. When you planned to do that, be definite with your purpose no matter what happens. Make the talk brief and be sure you have a ready cab available so you can get away fast.
I am a Christian and for several times God has been with me in many difficult situations.
2007-01-11 12:20:26 · answer #3 · answered by Grace 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait, so is he aggressive and you're terrified of him, or is he a nice guy?
If you think that this guy can flip on you because he's super possessive, then start breaking up with him slowly. If he calls you today, don't return his call until tomorrow and don't talk for too long. Next time he calls, don't return his call until a few days later, tell him you were busy... He'll get a clue real quick that you are no longer really interested in him. Then, if he still keeps calling you after a couple of weeks of this, you can either call him or text him, or e-mail him and just tell him that he's a nice guy, but you just don't see this working out and you want to focus on other things in your life right now.
If he's not possessive and you are not worried about him possibly stalking you, etc. then you can just text him (I'd rather text than e-mail) and tell him that you don't think it's working out and you think it's time for both of you to move on. He'll likely call you right after that. Let him leave you a voicemail. Listen to his response. Send additional texts if necessary, but you don't necessarily need to talk to him ever again.
2007-01-11 12:07:52 · answer #4 · answered by yishor 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, he's a nice aggressive guy. That doesn't seem to go hand in hand, but there are a couple of things you can do.
Get a friend, preferably a big guy, and have your boyfriend meet you in a public setting. He wouldn't expect it and he might not feel the urge to freak out. If he does, then you will have your handy big and strong male friend to be in the shadows, he'll get your back for you. It is always best to do these things in person. Or, you can break up with him online. Remember, online, you wouldn't really see his expresssion and you really wouldn't have closure. Those seem to be your two options. I can't think of anything else. Good luck.
2007-01-11 12:05:41 · answer #5 · answered by zumi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you fear for your safety, don't be with him alone, including the breaking up. If you do not fear for your safety (I can't tell which it is based on your post), you would deprive both of you the opportunity to learn what went wrong if you don't have this talk in person. These hardest situations are the ones that contain the most personal growth. It really sucks to go through it but once you do and you look back...well...you'll know what I mean later...good luck :)
2007-01-11 12:03:46 · answer #6 · answered by mickeymouse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
On line is OK - the etiquette police would say it is terribly wrong, but they are old people still using snail mail and really rather funny. On line also frees you up to really tell it like it is. You can say what you actually feel and mean without the fear of getting slapped. Go for it and say - Hi - Guess what - I'm dumping you - kicking you to that curb, washing you right out of my hair......
2007-01-11 12:05:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is what I used to do when I broke up with a guy: I just stopped talking to him. Dont return his calls, answer his emails or messages, just let him fade into non existance. He will eventually get the hint, and you don't have to actually deal with the problem. Note: this only works 80% of the time
2007-01-11 12:02:21 · answer #8 · answered by Smitten_Kitten 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's kinda mean to break up w/someone on-line.
But u also said he's aggressive and ur scared and on-line seems to sound better now!!! But if u choose to break up with him in person make sure you have a friend near you somewhat and it's in a kinda crowded place where people can see you guys......just in case!!!!
Good luck on this one........hope it goes smooth!!!!!!!
2007-01-11 12:05:03 · answer #9 · answered by have-fun 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tiff: no it's the right thing to do ! because alot of singles end
their relationship one way or other.See perhaps you need some
protection would help out ok? http://yahoo.on-lineprotection.com
free installation from Yahoo I use it very personly also great idea
too . Well yourself take an breather & rest today and God Bless
2007-01-11 12:13:00 · answer #10 · answered by toddk57@sbcglobal.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he a nice guy or is he aggressive and terrifies you?
I'd prefer to hear it directly. Several have broken up with me and I can respect only one of them to this day because she had the common decency and respect to tell me in person.
2007-01-11 12:04:14 · answer #11 · answered by Awesome Bill 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋