I feel like I never want to engage in sexual intercourse ever. Being a virgin until I die sounds fine with me.
To me, sex is overrated. I feel like I hate it. Despite that, I talk dirty around my friends & love dirty jokes. When I grow up, I want to marry and have kids but the sex part scares me. I'm afraid of pain, bleeding, STDs and unwanted pregnancy. My father is a minister who taught me to wait til I'm married.
What if I lose it to the wrong guy? What if he uses me? What if I'm not married when I have sex? What if I'm raped?
I want to be in love when I experience my first time. That seems unlikely. My parents told me that all guys just want is sex and thats it. How am I supposed to believe that there is someone out there made for me?
I hope to adopt when I'm a lot older than I am now. Not going through the miracle of child birth because I'm afraid of sex seems weird to me though. But, I told myself that the child could grow up to go against my beliefs and such.
2007-01-11 11:28:09 · 11 answers · asked by darkskinnedxbeauty 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I was in love once and during that time I felt ready for sex and the consequences that came after it. Now, the thought of sex disgusts me.
2007-01-11 11:28:58 · update #1
Sex is a natural thing... your parents are obviously influenced by religion, but you have to step back and think about it. Sex is a part of life (a huge part) that you should experience.
I don't know what you think you know about sex, but it's definitely not all about pain, bleeding, STDs and unwanted pregnancies... if you only have sex with the one person you love (and trust), then these issues won't be issues.
I would definitely recommend waiting until you find a guy you love and see a definite future with. I'm with my b/f of 5 years, and we had sex after the 1st year of being together. It's sooo much fun, especially because I really love him and I know he feels the same. Your parents are wrong. A lot of boys want sex because it's new to them and just became interesting, but many of them actually want long term relationships.
Don't go through life believing that you don't want to have sex. What if you don't? You're going to be missing out on A LOT. Just wait until you find the right guy. Good luck with this. You might even want to think about therapy or something if it's more serious than what I think it is.
2007-01-11 11:41:07 · answer #1 · answered by F.J. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like you worry an awful lot about something that may never happen. First, listen to your parents and maintain your virtue and your virginity. When you meet the right guy, and this will be someone you want to spend the rest of your life with and raise a family with, you will know. You do not have to have sex with him just because he is a great guy.
If things work out that you do get married to this guy, I would suggest a visit to your doctor to take care of that little problem that could cause pain and bleeding.
The first time you have sex, i would also suggest that you use some sort of lubricant. As you get aroused, your body creates its own natural lubricant, but sometimes it just isn't enough.
The person you marry will be considerate, so use the lubricant. the more you engage in sex, the more elastic and moist you will become. After a short while, it will feel good and you will be ready to enjoy a full and active sex life. You may even want children of your own. Good luck.
Oh and by the way, marry the guy and as long as you both behave yourself, STDs will cause you no concern.
2007-01-11 19:37:35 · answer #2 · answered by David L 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well sex isnt really as a disgusting thing when you think about it with the person you love. Like, the thing about sex is it has been corrupted by the world into a casual action, which normally leaves you feeling like an object. Truth is sex is a beautiful thing when you do it with a person you truly love. You said it yourself, you once felt ready for it, why? because you thought you had the right person, you didn't but the thought of it was enough to make you feel ready. You are perfectly normal, you are just over conscious of the way the image of sex has been tainted by our society. Just relax, know that your thoughts are perfectly normal, and wait for that special person who will make you truly ready.
2007-01-11 19:38:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First you worry way to much you are worrying about things that hasn't happen and might never happen. Second I'm sorry I disagree with you parents because not all boys are like that.By the way if you think I don't know what I'm talking about I am the mother of a 18 year old girl and we talk about everything and yes we talk about sex. I think you have been grilled your whole life about sex and that is the reason you are so terrified today you may want to talk to another adult about this because this could follow you trough out your life.
2007-01-11 19:39:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sex with someone you love is wonderful and someday you will find this out for yourself. In the mean time enjoy your childhood and don't worry about things that you are not ready to deal with. When you are old enough your thoughts will change and you will be able to make decisions based on feelings other than fear.
2007-01-11 19:38:04 · answer #5 · answered by noddy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Poor you. Sex really isnt such a big deal, for me its not that much further than kissing someone. Having said that, id only kiss someone i felt strongly about. I think you are scared of and fascinated by sex. Its not true all guys want is sex, in my experience they dont want it any more than girls do! Please relax and when you do fall in love again, im sure you will find out sex isnt as scary as it seems.
2007-01-11 19:34:37 · answer #6 · answered by prettyflower17 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're not alone in your feelings. My daughter in Bible school once felt the same way until she feel in love. She had waited as we taught her. Now she wants kids and sex will be a strong part of her marriage.
Things change. . . .love does that.
2007-01-11 19:49:52 · answer #7 · answered by snddupree 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The worse evil to visit this planet ever are religion, preist/preachers/ministers/Muslim clerics.
Enjoy life. Let daddy lay in his bed. The odds are high that he never practicec what he preaches
2007-01-11 19:33:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I am sorry sex seams awful to you but i am glad to hear one person say they want to wait till marriage it is rare to come by in todays world GO DAD and Yea for you!!!!!!
2007-01-11 20:00:35 · answer #9 · answered by summer 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that you should follow your heart & do it whenever you feel ready & comfortable with the person you are with.
2007-01-11 19:32:05 · answer #10 · answered by jane doe 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋