What should i be doing with my 4 year old during the day?

Question

My son turns 4 this month. I feel like a bad mom cause he never went to daycare and his isnt in preschool. He goes to a playgroup twice a week with me and the have preschool activies. I feel he is board with me. I have educational videos and a prescholl computer game thing. His father plays with him as do I. Its hard because I just had a baby. I want to give him the best and I want him to be happy. We cant really afford preschool right now since i'm at school at night we only have one income.

My son knows his shapes, colors, we are working on numbers, speaks very well , is well behaved. Should he be in preschool, does he have to be. I read to him, his father and I play with him. He goes to a playgroup twice a week and church once. What are kids his age doing during the day?

Answer 1

Go to nick Jr they have printable activities by age.
www.nickjr.com or www.familycorner.com

Answer 2

I think you are being too hard on yourself. It sounds like he is doing fine. He may be a little bored once in a while when you are tending to the baby but that is natural and he can entertain himself for a while...it will not hurt him. If anything that helps him. I was the same way when I had my second child and worried about my daughter. I can suggest maybe giving him some very important "jobs" to do so he can feel like a big brother and helper. Such as washing the baby bottles (you will probably have to was them again but it will be half done!), putting away his clothes, gathering up toys to put away, etc. And you canalways turn on music and let him dance, set up a craft he can do mostly on his own while you are feeding the baby. I just looked up "how to entertain 3 year old boy" on google because I am burnt out and am having trouble thinking of new things...That was very helpful because it gave me a handful of new ideas to go on.

If you can't afford preschool, you can't. Don't regret it because "everyone else is doing it". Not long ago they didn't even have preschool. And he is going to playgroup which is great. It sounds as though he is learning what he needs to and isn't behind at all. As long as he has a happy, stable homelife and gets enough attention from you and his dad...everything else will fall into place when he gets in school. Good luck to you!

Answer 3

My oldest daughter is two months younger than your son. And it sounds to me like he is doing just fine. He acutally does more than her with the playgroup thing, all she has is church once a week and friends a couple times a month. I also worry about her being bored or needing more activity. I am thinking about putting her in a preschool in the fall for a year before she starts kindergarten, but I also am worried about affording it. Here where I live they have a preschool that you can qualify for by being low income it's called Early Head Start. You may be able to find one similar in your area by asking your Health Department or Medicaid Office.

Answer 4

I have a 4 year old too, and I sometimes feel the same way. One thing I have learned from my pediatrician, no more than 2 hours screen time (Any kind of T.V. and or Computer) a day. More and this can contribute to ADHD. I have learned to teach my child to play by himself. It's hard, but now that you have a new baby, your are going to need the time. My kids generally play by themselves during the day, I do all the house stuff. We do one activity, crayons, play dough, etc. And then my husband and I spend a good couple hours playing on the floor with them after dinner, hide and seek, duck duck goose... And don't feel bad about preschool.. Studies have shown that the only way kindergarten teachers can tell the difference between a kid that went, and one that didn't, the ones that did raise their hand.. Plus, this is the time that you can mold your child into the kind of person YOU want him to be. Teach him the things you want to before you send him out in the world to learn all the bad things from other kids!

Answer 5

Don't feel like a bad mother because he didn't go to a daycare, he would just end up being sick all the time, and you are his mom , he is better off with you. There are tons of things to do, colouring, play-doh, hide things around the house and have a scavenger hunt, go for walks together. Mothers never feel like they are doing a good enough job, but he will remember the time he spent with you fondly, and be glad he spent his young years with his mom and not some lady that works at a daycare. I personally think if you want a baby you should be able to afford to stay home with it, maybe i am old-fashioned. Anyway, put on music and dance together, read books when your baby is sleeping.

Answer 6

What are 4 year olds in preschool doing?
Social Skills
Structured Time/Schedule
Cutting
Pasting
Coloring
Painting
Playdoh
Songs/Music

I would highly recommend you looking into preschool. This is NOT the educational world that we grew up in. What you child will be expected to know in Kindergarten is unbelieveable. If nothing else if will help your child begin to understand being away from home, listening to other adults, following a routine, etc....

If you are going to keep him home I would suggest dumping the videos and computer as educational devices! Go for HANDS ON!!!!! Look on line... there are tons of suggestions for things to do w/ kids!!

Answer 7

No, he definately doesn't HAVE to be in preschool; you only need to dedicate the needed part of your every day to continue his learning and development or he will undoubtedly lack in some perspectives and be a bit behind. It's hard having two kids at home; I have a 3 year old and a 4 month old. But I have noticed that since I left my daycare (I have worked in child development for 2 years with kids 6 wks - 12 yrs of age) my daughter isn't showing signs of progress, since I really need to devote even more time to her development.

Answer 8

I went through a similar situation with my daughter. We're a military family, so starting preschool with moving around would be difficult... here's what I started doing...
Make most things you do educational. When you have to go to the grocery store, make a list and have him help with it... ask if he recognizes items as you're going along... "where's the red apple?" I've recently gone through asking what is in each room of our house, "What is in the kitchen? What is it used for? What is in the bathroom? What does baby do?" While waiting at dr's appointments, or asking her to tell me a story... telling her about "Susie losing her cat... how do you think she feels? Susie is having a Birthday party, how do you think she feels?" passes the time, and she's learning something...
Count the baby's toes, etc... practice the alphabet in the bathtub with those bath crayons (if he's interested and your bathroom wall is nonporous), I would spell out the letters on the wall and have her practice underneath. This is how she learned to write her name.

Children learn through repeatition and the alphabet is first learned through memorization, but by the time he hits kindergarden he'll start to get it more, if not they do go through it in kindergarden.

my daugther, who's turning 5, learned a lot and loves this program on her laptop...

http://www.wartoft.nu/software/sebran/

at first it's a little hard, but over the year it gets a little easier and prepares her for school and she's having fun doing it.

Feel free to email me if you've got ?s about anything.

ps: if you start counting with the baby super early it makes the transition easier to do as they get older... preschool isn't for everyone, and it doesn't guarantee your child will do well. (my oldest daughter has been involved with a child development study since she was 6 months old, and is ahead in a great deal of areas and has only been in my custody...no babysitters, or other family care ever. She's played with other kids every so often, but no pre-school, or groups whatsoever)

Answer 9

It sounds like you are doing a lot right with him. See if your local library has a story time for his age group. there are free preschools if you qualify. call your local school board office and ask. maybe one of his friends from the playgroup could come to your house (or he could go there) once in a while. don't worry, you're doing fine.

Answer 10

I am a big fan of preschool because it gives social skills "playing with" mom and dad won't give. Check with your public school system for a K-4 program that's free. My son begs to go.

Answer 11

He should know the alphabet. You should definitely be teaching him to write his name and his letters and numbers. Also knowing the days of the week and the date are a good head start. Spelling simple words like his favorite colors. Talk about the weather outside. Make sure he knows how to take care of himself by tying his shoes, putting on his jacket, and buttoning his pants by himself when he goes to the bathroom. We also teach them their first and last name, birth-date, and phone number. Oh, and also mommy and daddy's names. There are plenty more but those are some basic things.