or whatever...AS LONG AS YOU SAY IT NICELY..."gosh i can't believe how rude that was"..or "that was sooo embarrassing.."..or "that was cruel"...? i was told my people that i should SPEAK UP...USUALLY i just say..."i see"...should i call it on them?
2007-01-11 08:04:32 · 5 answers · asked by sweet 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
If it's blatantly rude, etc. I would say "geez how rude" and be direct.
2007-01-11 08:23:07 · answer #1 · answered by Raven 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure. Are they being rude to YOU? If so, you should always let people know you aren't a push over and that you deserve respect just like everyone else. If they are being rude to others and you're just a bystander, take the other person's side. Like if the rude person says, something like, "Cindy should stop letting dog groomers cut her hair." You should say, "Really? Everyone was talking at lunch about how cute it is. I think it looks nice." Then walk away. That person won't come to you to talk smack about others anymore. I had a co-worker like that and whatever she would say about people, I would say the contrary. She finally got the point that I'm not a gossip or a "mean girl."
2007-01-11 08:21:49 · answer #2 · answered by Just gorgeous dahling 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cruel, rude, selfish and bacstabber are all accusing words.
it's better to say how you felt without accusing the other person.
be true to your own feelings
"i felt embarrassed when she said that because..."
try to be really nonjudgmental and just say your own internal feelings.
this is marshall rosenberg's method (and others)
you cannot accuse in a nice tone and be ok.
it's still accusing. hurling an accusation.
just be genuine and tell your feelings.
"i felt sad when i heard her say that because i care about cindy"
or something like that
words with an accusation will not help.
focus on your own INTERNAL feelings
not what you think the other person did wrong
but how you felt.
2007-01-11 08:13:35 · answer #3 · answered by Sufi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes it is better to not say anything. I guess you have to judge each incident separately. I always say "that's interesting" when someone says something I don't necessarily agree with or asks me if I like something when I don't feel comfortable being honest if I don't like it. But sometimes you do have to say something especially if that person continues to bad mouth or gossip about a person and they don't deserve it. Eventually they do need to see the light.
2007-01-11 08:16:05 · answer #4 · answered by wendygirl1000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are saying it to you - speak up.
If they are saying it about someone else, disagree with them if you don't agree. If you do agree, don't say anything. What you permit increases and it is never good to let people pull other people down behind their backs.
2007-01-11 08:38:47 · answer #5 · answered by Jeancommunicates 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋