Is this a mental disease?

Question

My boyfriend was laying on the couch last night, sleeping. When he awoke, he started screaming at me about calling him insane and crazy and about a conversation WE NEVER HAD. I kept trying to tell him we never had that conversation and I never called him insane, but he isn't listening and continued to yell. At first I thought he wasn't coherant because he was sleeping, but he's still angry at me today!

At one point last night, he even searched for a cigarette he was sure he had lit when he had been sleeping almost all night. I told him he didn't have one lit and he accused me of calling him crazy again. Is this a mental problem or something else? I'm not sure how to deal with this. Everytime we talk about his mental state, he blows up at me for mentioning it.

Any ideas what this is or what I should do?

Answer 1

Be afraid.... be very afraid!


Tell him that if he does not behave I'll bite him with my powerful jaws!!!

Answer 2

He is not "crazy". But his anger is frightening. He was probably dreaming of all of these events. Our dreams can be very real to us. I have had dreams of finding money in places. When you get up - you look!!!
He probably dreamed these events & awoke w/ that in his head that it was real. & - men do sleep deeper (usually) than women do. They do get more of the dream state sleep (REM) than women. That is also the state where most dreaming occurs.
To me, like I said, the anger is more of the issue here. That is where you should be worring. To have you tell him these events did not happen & that he still is angry & such is a scary truth. If he is this angry now over what is sure to have been a dream. I would watch myself later on. Anger only escalates. As w/ abuse. To hit someone the first time is the hardest. After that they hitting is easier & more & worse.
I lived there - don't go there - not even to visit!
You may want to try to find out though, if there is some mental illness in his past or his family's past. If this is something that he angers about or thinks about - there may be reasons for his anger or blowing up. Maybe he has been diagnosed with "bi-polar" or "manic depression". Both of these cause huge mood swings, easy anger, easy outbursts. Know what your getting into. This is also your life you are talking about!

Answer 3

It sort of sounds like sleepwalking, in which he's not really awake and is acting out something he's actually experiencing in a dream, not in reality. But, if that were the case, it's unlikely he would still be delusional (which is kind of what he is!) the next day, when you know for sure he is actually awake. So, I'm not sure what might account for this behavior. Is it possible he is taking drugs? Many stimulants (cocaine, methamphetamine, etc.) can cause irrational paranoia and these types of emotional outbursts. But if you are positive he's not on drugs, I'd urge you wait until he seems normal and calm and then sit him down for a serious talk about your concerns. Don't tell him he's crazy or acting like a mental case -- just describe what's happening and tell him you are worried about his health and want to understand what is going on.

I'm also concerned for your safety, as it seems like he is exploding into irrational anger and at some point, he may become violent with you. Please be careful! You may also want to consider talking to a doctor or mental health professional about what is going on -- even if your boyfriend refuses to go with you. Good luck!

Answer 4

Well you definitely need to have a talk with him. Ask him direct questions such as is he taking any drugs both legal and illegal? Ask him about his family medical history.Since you are we him does he seem to drink too much? Now since he seems so defensive maybe you have justifiable concerns but also you may also need to be fearful. Depending on the illness some can be very dangerous both to you and for him. Many times people with mental illness keep that very private because our society still has very negative views about mental illness. People don't take into consideration that it is an illness like diabetes, high blood pressure etc. If he does take medication for possible mental illness then he may have run out and now the illness is taking over and if he has choice to keep it a secret from you that may answer why he's so defensive. Even if this is sick way of getting out of the relationship as some believe you really need to think about getting out untill he can get help or hopefully come clean with whatever he may be hiding. Good luck and stay safe.

Answer 5

I would rule out use of drugs....If this is unusual behavior for him and no one else has ever known him to do it that would be a place to start. I don't mean to sound accusatory, I do not know your boyfriend. It could be any number of things which could include some type of mental illness starting. It could be something as simple as a bad dream which seemed real.
At any rate, if he continues to believe it really happened and more episodes continue, he will need a psych eval....I would talk to those who have known him a long time to get their opinion on the matter.

Answer 6

This is not a safe situation for you to be in. As to the "airhead" who says it's nice that you "support him", she doesn't have a clue as to what the danger to you might be. You are around a loaded gun and one day it may be aimed at you.

He is having a psychotic episode precipitated by who knows what. It could be organic like a tumor, mood or more likely a personality disorder, or a reaction to past or present drug use.

The fact that he "blows up" for mentioning it is not a good sign. He's in denial. Tell him your relationship is "on hold" until he seeks professional help. Tell him on a phone or in a letter. But do not tell him in person. Also let him know that you are afraid of him until he gets some help. BUT definitely do not stay in this relationship as it is.

Answer 7

I see right through what he is doing because if he's still angry with you even though he's now wide awake and the incedent has passed, then he's preparing to begin his physical abuse.

Instead of admitting the fact that he can't stand you anymore to your face, he's making it appear that he's not responsible for his own actions. Otherwise he will start to physically harm you and you will end up battered and he can say that you made him do it.

The benefit for him is that he actually get's off on it as a power game and the benefit for you is your belief that you can fix him. But, many women are mamed for life or die trying.

Get out of there while your still unscathed physically while you still can. Humble yourself and let your family and his family know what he's doing... because, after all.... you are responsible for saving your own life.

Answer 8

I wouldn't say he's insane but does have mental problems to a certain extent. He must have drempt pretty hard to believe it when he woke up because he couldn't tell the difference the next day. However, not being able to accept that something really didn't happen (when likely if you did have an argument, he wouldn't be the only one mad, (it takes two to fight)). But hey, if he wants to start an argument that never happened, listen to the story and just have it out with him!!!!!

Answer 9

Either how to loose a girl in 10 days or he needs to be sent to a mental institute!

Answer 10

Sounds like your guy has some issues going on in his head. Is he under a great deal of stress? It's got to be tough on you the way he reacts to your trying to help him. It's great that you are there to support him - are there any particular times when you 2 can speak without him getting angry? You can suggest to him that it may help him to see a doctor, but remember, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. Good luck!

Answer 11

Does he do drugs? Does he drink excessively? This could be a symptom of substance abuse or mental instability. At any rate you cannot cure him and he won't get cured unless he wants to. Run away! Far away!