Am i justified in breaking up with him?

Question

The abridged version is that we had been going out for less than a week and i called him on Fri & Sat night to see if he wanted to do something. He rejected me b/c he was hanging out with his friends. He could only fit me in during the day on Sat. But i dont see why i couldnt hang out with him and his friends. I understand the whole "hanging out with da boys" thing, but this wasn't a matter of male bonding cuz all his friends are girls. I just wanted an invitation to hang out with him and his friends but i failed to get that on multiple occasions. And practically everyday he would hang out with his best friend (a girl) and then call me as an after thought. I know he was friends with them WAY before he even knew me, but is it too much to ask to be incorporated into his life with his friends. I didn't want to be the clingy girlfriend, but i think for at least the 1st two weeks of a relationship there should be a honeymoon period where both ppl are inseparable... well not to that extreme

Our break up was weird (but that was totally my fault) So after a lackluster convo with him on Sunday. I called him back 5 mins later and blurted out, "I know i just called you but i think we should just be friends" and all he said was "ok" the whole convo lasted 34 secs according to my cell & while saying this i had a nervous laugh. I approached this break up as if i was scared and shot with my eyes closed. During the "weekend of ignorance" while i sat at home not being with my new BF, i planned a civilized and well thought out break up speech conveying all my feelings... but that went out the window... but really i think the mean reason i broke up with him is b/c i wasnt sure if i liked him or the fact that i had a bf (which is quite sad & i hate when ppl are in that type of relationships) but now he wont call me back so we can discuss just being friends and getting to know each other better, so i dont have the confusion of whether he was Mr Right or just Mr Right-Now.

Answer 1

I think he didn't want to make you jealous so he kept you and his girlfriends separate. Probably it has happened that he's had his girlfriends meet his friends and they got all bothered and jealous and became too much to handle.

Unfortunately, the opposite happened as well, that without involving you with his friends, you didn't seem that important to him.

I agree that the GIRLFRIEND should be number one on his priority list. I think he's confused himself with too many girls.

You are justified to dump him...he's not balanced enough, and you don't want to be the guinea pig until he gets his act together for a real relationship.

I read your comment later whether he was Mr. Right or Mr. Right-Now.

It doesn't matter. I'm sure you have friends and you know how you treat them and they treat you. If he's not reciprocating that frienship, don't pursue it. It's over. Just tell yourself that and it'll seem much easier to feel it as the time goes by. By next week, I bet you'll finally see how badly he treated you and you won't give your dumping him a second thought ever again.

I guarantee it.

Answer 2

You are too clingy. He is the kinda guy who has plenty of female attention and if you cant keep up or put up with that then you should move on.
He is not a player or a cheater, but he had female friends before you came along and though there is nothing wrong with you wanting to know his friends, you cant expect him to bring you into every aspect of his life just after two weeks of going out

Answer 3

Maybe after less than a week he's not ready to introduce you to his friends yet. Some people are like that. But if you're having doubts already, it's always best to move on. Even during the first two weeks though you still need space from someone.

Answer 4

it is your Choice to do that,in a relationship the boy or girlfriend should be 1st in the relationship not friends and he should want you to hang out with and his friends so you can get to know them and be comfortable.Have you talked to him about this? I would and then see what his response is and go from there,if he is going to put you in 2nd place then cut the ties and find someone who puts you 1st. Good Luck

Answer 5

Have you talked to him about this yet? That's what you need to start by doing. Tell him exactly what you just told us... even show him this question if that's easier.

I'm sure that he does not mean any harm by spending time with his friends, even if they are female. But you are right, you do deserve some time with him. He probably doesn't realize what he is doing, which is why you need to sit him down and have a serious talk about it.

Don't break up with him just yet... talk it over and see what he says.

Answer 6

Something "else" is definitely going on there...he's obviously not interested in you. Any man who's interested would automatically call you up for a weekend date. He sounds like a real idiot, and since it's only been less than a week, forget him! No need to hang on it...

**P.S.

Come to think of it, THERE WAS NO RELATIONSHIP!

Ur crazy...and clingy.

Answer 7

Girl friends are hard to compete with, as females ourselves we know how challenging a woman can be. You should either back out now to save yourself the aggravation or show him that you are confident and trust that his girl friends are just that.

Answer 8

Yes

Answer 9

girl just stay single and wait for someone who treats you the way you want to be treated. If he doesnt want you around his other girlfriends, then there is something wrong with that. youre totally justified in breaking up with him.

Answer 10

yes you are justified to break up with him...
actually, you don't need to justify your actions when you break up with him...it's constant clear that there is no reason for you to stay in a relationship with this kind of guy who regards you as his last priority and last resort...you don't deserve him because he doesn't know how to appreciate your presence.
remember: Don't make someone a *priority* who only makes you an *option*...