What to do about a drug addict?

Question

Ok, stay with me here. I know a person who is a career drug addict; she has been jailed for abandoning her child at a meth clinic in order to get high; has been in rehab numerous times; she has committed various crimes to get drugs and now has a warrant out for her arrest.

She just came back from a stint in rehab and two days later she disappeared after going to the store. I've heard she is flopping at a crack house in my neighborhood and I'm thinkning about picking her up and taking her back to her family.

I would like to call the police and have them do it, but apparently they have been called many times about this particular house, as well as this girl, so chances are they will not respond.

I am at the end of my rope. I realise more rehab will do nothing, but I am sick of seeing this woman abandon her family time and again. Is there anything I can do? Thanks.

I am afraid to call CPS b/c I feel bad about possibly breaking up her family. Her children are currently being taken care of by relatives.

Answer 1

Just let it be. An addict will only quit when he or she is ready.

Answer 2

if this person is truly an addict then there is a 12 step program for her that she can attand free of charge.

these 12 step programs are remarkable, and have helped millions and millions of people for decades.

if your friend is truly an addict then she is 'medicating' pain away with drugs, or at least that was her original intention with using drugs.

using drugs, which may have taken away her pain at first, i'm sure now are the primary source of pain.

your friend probably also needs some kind of therapy, where she can explore the roots of her pain.

getting at the pain behind addiction is very important.

sadly though, you may need to let you friend hit rock bottom before she is willing to truly admit that her life is out of control and that she needs help.

always being there for an addict, may just enable their addiction.

don't let that happen, but be there for support and maybe even attand 12 step meetings with her just for support.

hope this helps...

Answer 3

Unfortunately you cannot help an addict that does not want to be helped.

I am not suggesting that you write her off, what I am suggesting is that you be ready to help when she decides she REALLY wants help.

I sounds to me like you are a kind and caring person who really wants to do what is right for this woman. It sounds like you have tried several times to come to this persons rescue. It does not sound like it's working. Can I suggest that you continue to help, but only help differently.

Unfortunately sometimes the best way to help someone in this type of situation is to stop helping. But, like I said be ready when she is.

Regarding the children, I know calling CPS seem like a harsh thing to do, but perhaps they should be allowed to help determine the best plan for them going forward... They (CPS) have access to all of the necessary resources, legal and otherwise that may come in handy later. Ask yourself this... What is to stop her from getting high and coming and taking her children?

It happens... Protect the children!


Good luck...

Answer 4

More rehab will do wonders!
What are you talking about?

You see, addicts and alcoholics never 'get better' until they lose everything.....this means children, friends, jobs....everything.

Luckily she is doing crack, which takes someone down really quickly....unlike booze, which can take you down when you're 70, after drinking for 40 years.

There's a fine-line between helping someone and allowing them to continue their destructive behavior. Think real hard about what you would like to do in your quest to 'help'.
Enabling is a guaranteed death-sentence.

Sometimes ....you just can't do anything, which, oftentimes is best.

Answer 5

As long as her children are with a responsible adult there's little that you can do. Until SHE is ready to admit that there is a problem and commit to solving it and getting and staying straight, nobody on the planet can help her.

There's no need to call CPS if the children are being properly cared for. But I would recommend that the relatives who are caring for them try to get legal guardianship of the children so that they can properly provide for them -- medical care, etc.

Answer 6

If I understand you correctly, she currently has a warrant out for her arrest. Call the police and tell them where you suspect she is, and they should have to respond. I would not go pick her up, but I would go through all authorities I could think of. First, the police, and then child protective services.

Answer 7

Sounds to me like you are trying to fix someone who doesn't want to be fixed.
Bottom line - until she decides to change you are wasting your energy on someone like this.
Call the police and get her picked up on her warrant - at least in custody the family will have the piece of mind that she has shelter, food, and is not actively using.

Answer 8

If her children are not being properly cared for you have a moral duty to call CPS.

Otherwise - there is nothing you can do to help her unless she decides to change.

There are some things you simply cannot do anything about.

Answer 9

Don't help people who doesn't want help.

Do not let the children go to Child Protection Services. Children end up missing under their protection!

Answer 10

She can be helped only if she wants to be helped. And it doesn't seem she wants that help. My advice is to stay away from her before she drags you down with her.