How does a mother leave her children? How does a father leve his children?

Question

Why is it like a double standard, meaning if a father runs away from his family he is just ordered child support, yet if a mother does this it may come down to her having to go to jail, the children being taken away, or her name plastered in the papers???? I really want serious input only.

Answer 1

I think that its harder on the mother because the mother gave birth to the children..People expect more of a connection between the mother and the children...Than the father and the children..The father didn't give labor..The mother did..Though women are have postpartum now and things are happening these days..I don't agree with anyone leaving their children..I feel that if you don't want a child..then you should use birth control..That is better than abandoning a child..because that will affect their whole life...If you experience postpartum.then it is best to get serious professional help..

I think that the father should get his name plastered as well also..because he helped to conceive the child

Answer 2

I may have missed something, but where do they put Mom's in jail for leaving her children with a responsible adult, which should be the Father?

Granted, there is a huge double standard for men and women on how they are viewed by the public if the kids end up with Dad, but there is no jail time or laws broken unless one or the other leaves their kids with no one. If that were the case either may go to jail.

When is it okay to leave the kids? Never? Never say never. Sometimes a parent realizes they are doing their children or child more harm then good by being close. It's a heart-wrenching situation, and i wish it upon no one.

Don't be too judgmental on people. It's hard to imagine what certain situations are really like. There are plenty of arm chair quarter backs in the world that are more then eager to tell people what they would do in a certain situation if they were in it. The functional word here is "IF" they were in it. But they aren't, so the criticism is hollow and means nothing.

Yes, somethings are cut and dry. Yes, some parents truly dessert their kids, yes, there are many cases where any of us would do something different, and yes, some situations are hard to understand so it's better to try to empathize then to be quick to criticize.

Tom

Answer 3

This is a very serious question that got me to think. I guess society still sees as a mother the primary caregiver of the children. And the children must stay with her, because the mother child bond is the strongest bond ever. It is more acceptable the behavior that a man can leave the children but a mother can't. I guess I did not address half of the issues of your question, but it is something. This has to do with society and what is acceptable from a man and what is acceptable from a woman. A woman leaving the children it is not acceptable. This is on our most primitive roots. If you look at chickens for example. The baby chickens follows the mother, not the rooster. The function of a man it is only spreed the seed and procreate. The function of a woman it is give birth, feed and nurse from her breast, educate and watch the kids like a hawk. Man hunt for the food a woman stay at home. This is as old as when God create the planet.

Answer 4

I don't know which state your refering to but if either parent puts a child in jepordy then they will be proscecuted. If the parent with custody abandonds the child then they will be proscecuted. If the father has custody and fails to profide for the child then he will go to jail, but in the most cases I've personaly known the woman got off scotch free.

Answer 5

exactly right...

and yet the men run around whining about how unfair the court is to men. if a mother did/said half of the things that the fathers do, we'd have our children taken away.

my ex would wrap trash bags around my babys bottom (the youngest of 4 children, she was 3/4 at the time). she would pee herself while on visitation (i guess he scared her). instead of changing her clothing (like a parent is supposed to do) he wrapped the big black trash bag around her bottom so she didnt get his couch wet.

he also called me lewd names to all four of my children.

if a daycare provider or neighbor had done these things, they would have gone to jail. my ex didnt even get a fine.

most of my children are now teens, and dont even want anything to do with him... they saw the true man for what he is. i didnt have to say a word... he did it to himself.

the system looks for excuses for some fathers, thats what i think.


http://www.wantedposters.com/deadbeats_usa_a_to_f.htm
http://www.deadbeatjustice.com/list.htm

http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/
http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/calculators.htm
http://www.helpyourselfdivorce.com/child-support-calculators.html
http://www.divorcehq.com/deadbeat.html
http://www.lawchek.com/Library1/_books/domestic/qanda/childsupp.htm
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/oro/regions/acf_regions.html
http://www.acf.dhhs.gov/programs/cse/
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/region2/index.html

http://www.supportkids.com/

http://www.singlemoms.org/info/main.htm
http://www.singlemotherresources.com/
http://www.angelfire.com/nj4/njcomputerchick
http://www.parentswithoutpartners.org/chapterfind.asp
http://www.mowaa.org/
http://modestneeds.org/
http://freecycle.org/
http://www.salvationarmyusa.org/usn/www_usn.nsf
http://www.redcross.org/where/chapts.asp

Answer 6

how true i agree the man seems to always carry on even with his new family.i raised my three girls myself and the rewards are i did it.their is no double standard.its a mans world always have been