My boyfriend just ended, or I should say, said he needed a break from our relationship, of 6 months. It was pretty serious, but he has a lot of things going on right now, in his personal life, including an impending nasty custody fight with an ex wife. He has said that he wants to become a better person, and that I and my kids do not deserve to have to deal with his problems. He insists that I have done nothing wrong, and that if he can get his life straightened out, he wants to come back. The problem is, this has happened very suddenly, and now I really don't know what to do, or how to handle it. I still love him, so I am giving his space, letting him call or text if he wants, but not initiating anything, and I told him that I am doing this, not because I don't want to call him, or see him, but so he isn't feeling pressured. It has turned out to be very difficult for me. It hurts, I miss him, and so do my kids...
I have to decide whether to stay and wait, or just move on...?
2007-01-11 03:40:42 · 7 answers · asked by jen ERNY 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sometimes, in order to move on, both people need to have time apart. It is horribly painful at first, but it will get better with time. Make a clean break. Don't do the on-again/off-again thing. It is an emotional drain and a huge waste of time. Take time away, if after a seperation you decide you both want to be together, you can try again, but you need to be apart to find out what is best for your both. Sorry you are hurting.
2007-01-11 03:47:00 · answer #1 · answered by Alexandriagal 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I needed time as well, and he obliged. Time helped us become better people. After the initial anger he felt towards me for ending things , he was able to swallow his pride and become a friend, even to the point of taking things further. We do more now together then we did before, and I'm loving it ! So yes, it's good to be friends, continue the way your going, but give him the space he needs. I don't want to disillusion you, sometimes space, per say is a cop out! It was honestly my cop out at first, but when I took a step back, I realized all I was going to lose. Sorry, I don't mean to make this all about me, but I'm just trying to prove my theory, time away, does help sometimes. I have not been able to put my ring back on, in over 6 months, to his dismay, but it's because I want to make sure I'm playing for keeps this time. Because your right it does hurt all parties involved. And to waiver back and forth hurts more. *** With enough said I wish you the best of luck!
2007-01-11 12:37:29 · answer #2 · answered by Aces 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First and foremost you have a responsibility to your kids. My ex boyfriend broke up with me suddenly too and was due in part to all the things he had going on in his life. You need to bring stability to your kids and while they did get attached to your ex, you need to move on, because if you guys get back together the next time something comes up in his life, he is going to break up with you. Don't subject yourself to that pain again or your kids. Good luck
2007-01-11 11:48:29 · answer #3 · answered by triste_girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heh I've tried remainimg friends with my recent ex. It worked for a day but now I can't stand him. Best thing to do is move on and find someone new.
2007-01-11 11:50:53 · answer #4 · answered by Kiara N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on and let him figure his stuff out. I think that you are right in letting him contact you. Just move on and see if he comes back to you. True love will find it's way.
2007-01-11 11:47:25 · answer #5 · answered by Jo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just live your life Love yourself, and you 'll get what belongs to you !
2007-01-11 11:50:21 · answer #6 · answered by Tellie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ABSOLUTLY NOT
2007-01-11 11:43:42 · answer #7 · answered by OMG 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋