My good friend, who happens to be in a very high position at my job always has her thong showing. She's in sales and is never in the office. When she comes in the men go crazy, but lately they've been demeaning her. How do I get her to stop. It's not professional and I know she has to know this because she's very smart.
2007-01-11 03:21:56 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Pull her aside and privately tell her what's going on. Let her know that it is not getting her the respect she deserves.
2007-01-11 03:26:17 · answer #1 · answered by PaganPoetess 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Uh, you don't say anything about getting the men to stop demeaning her. You should talk to a supervisor about their inappropriate behavior.
You're unclear as to what's going on.
Are you sure she realizes her underwear is showing? If not, let her know there's something about her clothes she needs to check.
Are they doing or saying things to her?
If so, she knows about it. If you think she's unhappy with this, and isn't making the connection with her underwear showing, you might gently suggest this connection.
If she doesn't find their behavior demeaning, then she doesn't have a problem, but the workplace is not a place for offensive behavior, and, again, you should look into the men keeping their thoughts to themselves while at work.
As for getting her to stop showing her underwear at work, talk to her supervisor about it. Her supervisor should be the one to bring unprofessional dress to her attention.
2007-01-11 05:37:06 · answer #2 · answered by tehabwa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are good friends then she would appreciate you telling her that you've heard demeaning remarks about her. She can be sexy and attractive without being sleazy, and with her thong showing, she's being sleazy. She may not realize this, and I know I would want my friends to tell me if there was bad office talk going on about me because of the way I dressed.
2007-01-11 03:35:58 · answer #3 · answered by AB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to her that you are aware of the lastest fad in dressing, expecially for teenagers, but she is a grown woman and that to get respect must start acting and appearing as one, and that it is highly inappropriate in the workplace for her to dress like this. Also tell her that if she dresses more appropriately she will not have to worry about sexual harassment or lack of respect from the opposite sex, also by her appearing this way in the workplace it makes the men of the workplace think that it is ok to make demeaning remarks about her and you find this distressing because you feel that it demeans all women.
Of course tell her that you are telling her this for her own good and not to necessarly criticize her.
2007-01-11 03:33:36 · answer #4 · answered by Jsess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, she knows exactly what she is doing. Don't believe for a second that this is not intentional. She likes the attention. But what she doesn';t know, that seeking that type of attention in the workplace is so very unprofessional. It;s okay for a party, a stoll in the mall.. whatever....but is she is in a very high position and she will not go any higher unless she dresses ,acts , & conducts herself professionally.
2007-01-12 04:22:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are really good friends with her, as you say, then definitely tell her in a non-offensive way that her "unmentionables" are being paraded out for everyone to see, and that it is incredibly inappropriate for a work environment.
You can probably word it a little more kindly--but that's the gist of it.
Also, if you're not as close as you say--leave it. SHe should be told--but that's something you should be close to a person to tell them. Not because of the privacy of the subject--obviously (assuming she is aware of it--she doesn't exactly understand the deal about underwear being a private thing), but because it can be embarrassing to be told something like that.
2007-01-11 03:27:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pull her aside and tell her in a friendly non judgmental way that although she is pretty flaunting herself at work takes away from her being treated like a professional. She may be hurt and mad but if she listens she will be better off in the long run. Good Luck
2007-01-11 05:49:35 · answer #7 · answered by C D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is an easy answer, and by the way you are a great friend for giving her information, and for just being there. I believe you tell her about it, as a friend if she really wants to up her sales, try not wearing any panties whatsoever, and her sales figures will really go up!
2007-01-11 05:26:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to just tell her what's been going on. Inform her that everyone can see her thong and recently the men in the department are degrading her.
2007-01-11 05:15:23 · answer #9 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You 2 are good friends,so tell her in private what is going on and start off with mentioning her qualities and that her reputation is threatened.Do you know anyone that she scared from?tell her to imagine that person walking in with her that way.
2007-01-11 04:59:53 · answer #10 · answered by Wind Chime 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋