I am having a wedding, however there are only a limited number of people that can come. Is it OK to send a wedding announcement instead of an invitation to the people we aren't able to invite?
2007-01-11 03:17:18 · 37 answers · asked by jimbo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
yes 100%
2007-01-11 03:19:36 · answer #1 · answered by ben n 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I always thought that the Wedding announcement was also the invitation. I received a Wedding announcement last week, but it also meant that I was invited to the wedding along with an invitation to the reception. Some people might get the wrong ideal if you send them just a Wedding announcement. They may think they are invited and show up any ways.
If you have a reception after wards and do not put an invitation in the Wedding announcement, then they will know that they are not invited to the reception. Good luck.
2007-01-11 03:25:44 · answer #2 · answered by Dorothy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, it isn't. By sending an announcement, these people will think they will be invited. When they find out that they are not, in fact, invited to the wedding, it will appear as though the announcements were sent for gift-giving purposes. It is both rude and tacky...don't do it.
You can, however, send out 'we just got married' announcements after the wedding. A lot of people do that with their Christmas cards, for example.
2007-01-11 04:33:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a really tough one. All the etiquette books fight over this one all the time. Basically I'm compiled for you the differences they say.
Emily Post-No 100% no. Thats like saying Please send a gift but I really don't want you to actually attend
Ann Landers/Dear Abby-No its rude
Miss Manners-Terribly rude
Many other books (Including Wedding Planning the Easy Way and The Everything Wedding Book) say that the difference between invitations and announcements is that invitations are sent prior and announcements should be sent after the wedding (as in you should probably mail them a day or 2 before the wedding so that it will arrive on the day of or the day after). and that it is perfectly ok but it should be worded in such a way to explain:
This is the annoucement of the wedding of Sarah and Andrew
who were married in a private ceremony with the immediate family on September 19, 2006.
The couple is residing at 709 Springfield Rd.
Most books and manners experts (well that felt it was appropriate to annouce) tend to agree that you need to specify Why they weren't invited (it was a small, private ceremony--even if you did invite 40-50 people). And to include a new residence address.
I know that personally I'd like to know if my sisters friend got married--even though there is no reason I should be invited. But as I send out christmas cards, new names and new addresses are very helpful with that process.
Though to appease the many experts that say it is rude to solicit gifts like that I would place at the bottom
"In lieu of gifts, please make a donation in the couples name to St Jude's Children's Hospital or the Dr. Phil Foundation"
Pick 2 well known charities that mean something to you (I live in a military town so they pick USO; a couple of my friends suggested the SPCA in NYC) That way people don't look at the annoucement as a plea for gifts and money and you help out a charity at the same time.
So I know this is long and I play devil's advocate for both sides but the short of it is--yes many people consider it rude (especially if you are southern) but since so many couples elope or have destination weddings but come back for a reception, I dont see why it is not perfectly acceptable to inform people of the change in status. Though just be careful if you chose not to have the "In lieu of gifts" line, that it might seem greedy. But yes If I were having a small wedding, I would send out annoucements to everyone. But really only if you have a small wedding.
I hope this helps! Good luck. and I'm sure everything will be beautiful.
2007-01-11 03:40:53 · answer #4 · answered by phantom_of_valkyrie 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, it is perfectly appropriate. But you should send the wedding announcement out after you've actually been married, especially so you won't seem like you're trying to get wedding gifts from people you haven't invited to the wedding. Also, it can be a combined wedding/moved announcement - if you are moving to a new home with your spouse, it can include your new address & phone # as well -- something like, "Hey, we're finally married and here's our new addres..."
2007-01-11 05:04:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely yes. My sister's second wedding (almost 15 years ago) was a private affair, and to this day there are some relatives who think that she and her husband are just shacking up and never got married. That sucks for everyone involved! No one takes their relationship seriously, an if she were to correct them now, 15 years later, I'm sure they would find it insulting that they never knew.
Announcements should not be sent before the wedding. This does get confusing, people will call you and that'll guilt you into telling them that they can come after all. You should have the city, landmark if applicable, but not address or time of day. They should have the date in case anyone wants to make note of your anniversary.
I sent announcements in both English and Spanish to several states, the UK, and Mexico. The majority were to people who wouldn't be able to come to our wedding, or wouldn't have wanted to enough to take time off work. (We got married on the anniversary of the day we first met, it was a Thursday.) I included a business card I made on those perforated run-through-your-printer cards with our new addresses, our cell phone numbers, and email addresses. I also included a wallet-sized picture of the wedding. (This was fairly inexpensive, we ordered it on Yahoo pictures. The picture was taken by my sister and not copyrighted.)
I got nothing but positive feedback about it, and no one bought us presents that hadn't already. (We got a few cards, I think.)
2007-01-11 05:57:34 · answer #6 · answered by calliope320 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, each has it's purpose.
Invitations go to people invited.
Announcements go to those you want to let know you got married. They are sent out the day of the wedding. Most times announcements don't expect a gift.
2007-01-11 03:23:45 · answer #7 · answered by weddrev 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is appropriate to send wedding announcements to family members and friends you were not able to invite to the wedding. Wedding announcements are sent immediately after your wedding ceremony (i.e., the next day) announcing your marriage. Wedding announcements should include the date and location where you were married. There will always be at least one person not happy that they were not invited, but you cannot please everyone.
2007-01-11 05:57:55 · answer #8 · answered by Veronica W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, it would probably be ok but i'd also put in a note saying sorry that you couldn't invite them but you are only having a small affair, just so they know that they definately can't come!! You don't want people receiving the announcements and turning up to the wedding!!
2007-01-11 03:21:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. The announcements should go out the day of your wedding and should be in the past tense...
Do not send them out beforehand because thay might think that they are getting an invite.
2007-01-11 09:59:17 · answer #10 · answered by VAWeddingSpecialist 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely!! That's what the announcements are for!! Think about it...you wouldn't send announcements to folks you would invite...they'll be there to see it! :-) Just remember that you need to wait until AFTER the ceremony to send the announcements. It's a big no-no to send them before. Usually the mother of the bride is the one who's responsible for mailing them out. After the ceremony/reception, she can stop by the post office on her way home and drop them off. Congratulations!!
2007-01-11 03:22:25 · answer #11 · answered by Rayne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋