Just because they're married, they feel more superior than others who are not. They like to generalized single women by saying we're either too picky or couldn't get a man to marry us. Some even give us that look as if there's something wrong with the thirty-something single women. Others give unkind remarks like we're the leftovers.
2007-01-11 01:35:01 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I have heard the same kind of thing too. Actually what you say reminded me of a very recent thing: during my therapy, the doctor (a Freudian analyst) told me that my sister (who is very unhappily married) knew how to be a woman for a man, and that I (who am currently separated and alone) do not, and that I am a total failure, but for my professional life. I went home crying. The next session I told the therapist I had cried, and she told me it was "good", cause it proved what she had said had "" caused some effect". I am still too shaken to see clearly through this, but this is the way everyone thinks. Males are measured on many ways, but success for women is solely being able to get a male and procreate.
The time during my marriage was by far the most troubled time of my life, and I really think I would be better off if I had stayed single all the way. So what I say is: let us not rush into anything just to fulfil the expectations of others.
My ex boss, who was Japanese, used to tell us this wise saying: "No one hits the head of a nail which is burried into the wood, like all the others. The nails which dare to stand tall are the ones which get hit on the head"
Everytime you hear people telling you those things, remember that you are standing taller than average, that is why you are getting hit. If your head were buried into the wood, they would not bother to hit you :-) No one kicks a "dead" dog, but only they kick for a reason: they feel threatened by your force, maybe your beauty, your freedom, your bravery, who knows...
I say there are times we wish we were like them, having a man to provide and protect us, so I will bet there are many times they wish they could be like us too, be they aware of that or not.
2007-01-11 02:12:29 · answer #1 · answered by Graça 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have friends and family unmarried in their 30's, that feel the same as you. But I'm also the butt of their jokes, for trying it at 21. So I guess, all the married, unmarried, separated, divorced....etc have issues and insecurities about the decisions they make. Causing some to lash out, or just take things the wrong way. Don't let it bother you, I stopped caring along time ago what people think of me, or my relationship. That's between him and me or me and him(dam, I wish this thing would correct my grammar), anyway I'm sure you get the jist of what I'm saying. Shrug it off with a joke, if they see it's a weakness for you, they'll ride you harder! As far as being left over crap, if my relationship craps out again, I'll gladly join you! Better to be leftover, then a main dish to an a---------!
2007-01-11 02:07:03 · answer #2 · answered by Aces 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I am a forty-something single woman and they don't bother me. You can look at their husbands, some of them are not worth having anyway. Others, you want to pity them for being stuck with a woman like that. I know some men who are totally the opposite of who they are married to. The guys are really sweet and really funny to be around and then there are their wives who are so stuck up if they went out in the rain without an umbrella they would drown.
Don't let these women get you down. And for goodness sakes, don't ever turn into one...LOL. Just kidding on the last part...I have no idea what makes them that way.
2007-01-11 01:42:02 · answer #3 · answered by DONNA M 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I don't know.....
I know that I have a single friend who's never married and I find myself admiring her so much for have done some of the things in life that she set out to do...like travel to many places, her independence, taking care of her sickly older Mother.
I only sympathize w/her during the times she says she WISH she had a relationship, but then quickly realize that it's really her choice whether she has one or not.
But then again a lot of single women think that married women "have it easy" and get envious of married women,like they took the easy road, which they didn't--these women just had the desire to spend their time w/a man, get married.
But I think the worst is married women who are married to some bigwig or to a man w/some fancy career, while they have one too, and they think that they are "better than" other women who chose to have a different type of career, or business,ect. I find these types VERY spiritually challenged folks who live in a very limited superficial, narrow-minded "cookie cutter" lifestyle that walk around like robots
2007-01-11 01:57:20 · answer #4 · answered by deirdrefaith 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They're stuck in the ideology that marriage equates fulfillment and a man is necessary. If anything, I think single women are far more fulfilled than they are. We have the freedom to do what we really want.
2007-01-11 04:41:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
J-e-a-l-o-u-s!
I am single and loving it. I don't worry about what anyone else thinks. I am not gay, I don't have anyone to b*tch at me when I get home from work, I leave home when I get ready and go home when I get ready...just as other single people do.
Besides, if I am going to be alone, I want to be ALONE by myself...not with a husband that I have to cook and clean for.
Alot of married people envy that!
2007-01-11 01:51:09 · answer #6 · answered by Weetie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well I cant say for sure but it could be single woman have a bad habit of flirting with married men. And the funny thing is They believe it is them that the men sneak around for. But in actuality,It is the sneaking that has the men exited.
2007-01-11 01:45:37 · answer #7 · answered by abby normal 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is because they find their self-worth through a man. They are jealous of our ability to be independent and to function on our own. When they are divorced with kids and can't pay their bills but look fat and wrinkly because they were "married" so they let themselves go and pushed out some puppies and gained the weight, we will still be ahead..... tell them to bugger off.
2007-01-11 01:40:09 · answer #8 · answered by Allyson_3 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Not all married women do that-but it is a problem. Just be comfortable with who you are and where you are in life-It just hasn't happened for you yet-but that doesn't mean that it will never happen-ie marriage.
Just look them back in the eyes-that'll let them know that you are ok with you.
2007-01-11 01:41:39 · answer #9 · answered by singsong 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Too many boneheads jump into marriage with no concept of commitment.
I applaud your foresightedness.
I've been happily married for 14 years, but always respect those who withstand external pressures to do something potentially stupid.
2007-01-11 01:41:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋