People who don't let you finish a thought................?

Question

Is it me, or have people's listening skills deteriorated significantly over the past few years? I have always been a polite conversationalist, who allows others to completely finish their thought when speaking, before I give my comment on it. More and more, I am finding that others do not show people the same courtesy. After I am about halfway through a sentence, people will jump in and give their opinion, not having the complete story, and, by the time they are done, they are not even close to talking about the point I was trying to make. More and more, I am finding (and I am from the old school on this, and do not enjoy doing it) that I have to interrupt them when they interrupt me, saying, "If you would please let me finish........." in order to make sure that my point is received, and I am not misinterpreted. Is it just me, or has society lost its ability to listen carefully and not assume, before listening to itself talk?

Answer 1

You are correct, people do tend to interrupt and give their opinion half way through, I think it's because we have so many self proclaimed "experts" in our society now. One way that I have found to counter this is let them give their "expert" comment half way through my observations and then I continue my discourse on a completely different tack, leading to a completely different conclusion so that their interjection was completely pointless and out of context, leaving them look foolish, with an open mouth and a sagging jaw.

Answer 2

You are right it is extremely rude. I do want to bring up a point tho, "the old school" does not always represent right and without flaw. My generation is looking at "old school" as rubbing off on our children's generation in all the wrong ways geared more so towards rebellion. I think it's better just to be grounded in the fact that rude is rude and there is no justification or excuse for it. The meaning of empathy has become so twisted around these days that it's being replaced with enabling which is cruel. What is cruel kindness...what's up with that concept? Rudeness amounts to people looking like they got their manners out of a box of Cracker Jacks. Everyone knows how to take turns talking and yet some think they are above it. Point- there is also a thing called personal judgement which is simply realizing how someone else is acting towards you and then letting a person know you don't appreciate it...that's what people do they converse. It's just too bad that rudeness seems to be an accomplishment these days. If one is trying to shut the other up but giving the appearance they care which is relativism cakeman stuff there will, no doubt, be an intrusion on someone's boundaries. "I love you, what's wrong, what's your point, your point means nothing to me, however don't talk when I speak and listen, go away" what a mess. A person has no choice but to notice something that sticks out like a sore thumb and say something without regret.

Don't let anyone ever tell you it's controlling to know the difference between peaceful and unpeaceful conversation and saying so. People these days have a real problem with treating people as they would like to be treated.

Answer 3

Manners in general seem to be becoming rare. I don't know if this in particular has been getting worse in recent years, I've experienced this a lot all my life, but it wouldn't surprise me if more people are becoming like this.

I'm very tired of how when I'm halfway through what I want to say people jump in with their assumptions and give out their opinions on what they think I'm talking about (not what I'm really talking about, since they haven't heard the whole story yet) or even laugh at what I'm saying without me even haven gotten to the main point yet. Then after their done with their interruptions and I want to finish the story they barely listen to the rest because they feel that since they already told their opinion the discussion is over, even though they completely missed the point.

I have gotten so annoyed over such poor manners that I avoid talking to certain people who I know do this a lot. It's funny how some people will not listen when I talk and then they're completely shocked that I don't feel like talking much.

Answer 4

I've perceived the same thing. My theory on the escalation of the problem is embedded in your question. In order to converse with an interrupter you have to become an interrupter yourself. Thus, except for those willing to be doormats to bad behavior, we all begin to sink into bad habits just to stay with the flow. A driver going the speed limit while everyone else is going ten miles over is quickly left behind.

Answer 5

Sometimes, people chip into a conversation, because
they need to find out an opinion or change what is said or
express themselves, step back listen and then add your
thoughts conversation is about communicating how two
or more people feel, do not think that by chipping in they
are being rude, you can learn so much from asking and
answering....In both a conversation and while you are trying
to hammer home your point.....Do not let another person
slap you down though, as this is rude....But, let everyone
have their say, then you will find that the conversation is
twosided instead of onesided..............................................

Answer 6

You're right, people don't listen. Its a fast paced world, people have things to do, etc. If you want to have a serious conversation it has to be over a meal or in the car or at least when the other person isn't about to run out the door. We have to slow things down to get better communications.

Answer 7

Everyone I know interrupts; to get a word in edgewise I am forced to do the same. I think a polite society is a good thing, unfortunately not many agree.

Answer 8

Yes listening skills and common courtesy have gone down the drain. It also happens here, when people jump to answer a question without thouroughly reading it.

Answer 9

Take control of the situation. Let them know what is up and call them out on their mistake. Hold firm a few times and then they will catch on.

Answer 10

I always listen to people complete conversation, but I am hardly ever heard out!