she always call him on the phone,but she's all the way in trinidad.she calls him at night,and if he doesnt answer her calls she starts too leave alot nasty voicemail.she sends him alot of tex msg saying i love u an all kind of sexy stuff.i told him 2 stop talking to her so much.he told me he would never stop talking to her.but we live in atlanta and shes all the way in trinidad.do u think i should leave him or talk too him again?
2007-01-11 00:24:10 · 27 answers · asked by hott g 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Watch out girl, there's something fishy here! Talk to him again & stand your grounds about cutting up the communication with her. If he refuses, then it's time for you to move on.
He's probably still in love with her & will start all over at the slightest opportunity. How could you live with a situation whereby your boyfriend recieves night calls & "I love u's" from his ex?
2007-01-11 00:35:11 · answer #1 · answered by ebony 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly you should just draw the line before it gets out of control. It is fine that they still talk, but he needs to tell her that he is in a committed relationship and does not appreciate all of the text messages and nasty voicemails if he doesn't answer her late night phone calls. Being a dude, I can tell you that he still has feelings for her and no matter how small the feeling is if you continue to let them talk they will never go away. Right now he is content with you because you are filling a void. You are the rebound girl if you will, and unfortunately the rebound almost never works out. You need to know what he is tell her too!! Does he leave the room when he talks to her, does he text her back and if so, what is he telling her? He loves her and unless you can put an end to it you will always be second best to him.
I know, because I did the same thing. I got out of a relationship that lasted 5 years and started talkin to this girl when I knew I still had feelings for my ex. I would meet my ex for dinner, breakfast, whatever. I talked to her on the phone told her I loved her and the whole time I told the new girl the same thing. She eventually found out and I am paying the price......Now my head is clear, I am over my ex completely and the girl who I truly love is gone. I have fought to get her back, but am still losing the battle. Put an end to it before you get in too deep and end up getting hurt!!! Best of luck sweetie.
Simon
2007-01-11 08:41:30 · answer #2 · answered by voodoo_lover_23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is quintessential for you to speak to him again about your concerns and explain to him that these incidents are causing constraints in you two's relationship. Tell him how passionate you feel about her calling and trying to control him when she has nothing to do with him any more. Tell him, talk to him, and preach to him that you will not put up with it anymore, but do not do it in a threatening way. Just tell him sincerely that if he wishes to continue communications with her despite respect for your relationship with him, then it seems his heart is not in the right place or his mind so you wish him all the luck in the world with the one he loves and that you are looking for someone who wants the same thing that you want and that is an open and honest relationship that will grow into something meaning ful and great. Also tell him that the way how things have been going latlely hasn't been what you wanted or what you are needing and looking for. Do not say "until you can give me that then I will be waiting." What you say is "the type of person or relationship I want and need is..." " And right now you are not giving me that with what you are doing, therefore you will either have to go your separate way or straighten up. Get to the point and do not pu88y foot around the situation.
Once you have had this conversation and you see that it is not improving, make your way to the door slowly. With that I mean start distancing your self from him gradually, making new friends, going out by yourself on walks, spending less time at his house especially on weekends if you do not live together until it is finally over. Believe me it works!
2007-01-11 08:48:54 · answer #3 · answered by starsmoonis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur guy still have the hots for the gal ma dear. AND HES GOT NO RESPECT for you. if he did he wouldnt be throwing it on your face that he wont stop toking to her while the gal is sending sassy texts. I wouldnt have a problem with ma guy communicating with an ex once in a while the how a u kind of tok coz once people have been lovers and didnt fight, they can remain friendly. but i would only accomodate a clean friendly relationship with a call in months. no regurlar communication. he might be using u to get over the gal and distance doesnt matter
trust ur insticts and make a decision before it hurts too much.
2007-01-11 08:55:43 · answer #4 · answered by LadyK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could try talking to him again, if he respects how you feel, he will at least consider your opinion. It is possible for a male and female to have once dated to remain friends. However, it is crossing the line when she gets angry and leaves nasty voice mails. The question you should ask him is why does he continue to allow her to call and what does he do when she leaves nasty voicemails. You can't tell who he can be friends with or who he can and can not talk to, that is being controlling, but maybe she is having a hard time letting go and he is trying to make the transisition easier for her. He needs to take responsibility for his actions. Neither of you can controll what she says or does.
2007-01-11 08:32:56 · answer #5 · answered by Saz_E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously, He still has ties with the Chick, If he was ALL into you there would be no need for all the chit chat with the Ex, Now I'm not gonna tell you to leave him because that's up to you, BUT I was in a similar situation and My boyfriend always wanted to talk to his Ex and I found out they where still messing around, so YOU do the math!!!!!!
And don't listen to that BULL about they are just friends.....THAT A BIG AS*S LIE!!!!
Good Luck,
~Tru Diva
2007-01-11 08:29:08 · answer #6 · answered by TruDiva 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should put on a big act and bring out the water works other wise nothing will happen and it will be the same. ...Maybe your bf is just a caring person and he doesnt want to be rude and shut her out... But because you want her gona put on the water works and cry all day. Make him feel guilty and when he breaks it off make it seem real say thank you and keep crying for a bit then if he doesnt make some thing to eat get up and make some think and with your red and teary eyes tell him it means alot and you love him, make it worth it.
... x o x o 1
2007-01-11 08:30:44 · answer #7 · answered by ♥..::Amy::..♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get out! dont waste anymore of your life! He's still attached to her, and that leaves no room for him to really get attached to you! And say one day she comes back here, or he cant take it anymore, and he goes there! I would give him an alternative at first. tell him to stop talking to her or your gone. and if he gives you the same answer as before that he will never stop talking to her. Then he doesnt care about you. I hope this helps, and Goodluck!
2007-01-11 08:30:22 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does she know that he is seeing you and you are his girlfriend?
He will never stop taking to her. Then why is he with you? I couldn't let him have both. If they talk every once in a while and I knew she knows about me, then no issue here. But to have everyday contact with whats written above. Hell , I would be done. No questions asked No answers needed. Good Bye.
2007-01-11 08:34:32 · answer #9 · answered by livelovelaugh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU have to answer that one.
If you are cool with being 2nd wing, then STAND BY YOUR MAN.
If you demand to be #1, then you have to call the bluff when your man tells you no and walk through the door and move on.
Just remember, we men like to see how much of our 'ish you will put up with.
If you let us keep our ex-es while we are having relationships with you, then you have to be accepting of the related DRAMA.
2007-01-11 08:35:52 · answer #10 · answered by DaMan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋