how do you get over sexual abuse?

Question

i need help to overcome mine but i dont know what to do

i cant see a therapist. if there is one thing in the world i want to avoid the most it is sitting in front of a person, looking them in the eye, and telling them about it. i will just never be able to do that.

thank you frankie, those are good ideas, but the problem is whenever i think i am ready to talk to a counsellor i can still never bring myself to make an appt... the thought of sitting down and telling the most humiliating experiences to my life to a stranger when i cant even sit through a kiss scene in a movie if another person is sitting beside me just makes me feel i would just sit on the chair with the shrink staring at me and i would say nothing and it would be a waste of money

Answer 1

Who ever done this to you is the one that needs the help not you. You did nothing wrong..To start with He did..What he done to you was wrong and it should be effecting the person that done you this way but instead it is tormenting you...Turn it around and let it torment the tormentor..Put it out of your mind.And just no this.. he is evil and done the evil. Why are you a shamed for what he done..you have enough wisdom in your self to no that He is at fault not you..You just need to forget this and go own with your life and if you will He will get what is coming around to him.Cause and effect what you cause you get the effect of...Quit letting what you didnt cause effect you so the effect can come own Him.As long as you receive the effect of his cause.You are causing your own suffering by not putting the blame were it needs to be own him...Have you turned him in...What is the status..Pray for the LOrd to set you free of self shame because you have nothing to shame...As fast as you let it go it will eat at your tormentor..He will suffer your suffering...God bless you and the Lord will set you free If you just call own Him to..I promise you He will....Live and be happy and fill your life with sunshine And dont talk about it no more...Just find it in your heart to forgive..The sick oh and you will find peace...You can do it I no you can....God bless you sweetie your in my prayers...And the resion he done this to you was because he has a sex demon own him...One that will drive him to destruction...

Answer 2

Ok , but still you are going to need to see a professional that can help you get through this. I know it is not an easy thing, and at first you have to get use to the person you are seeing, and feel comfortable with them. Most people can not just open up to a stranger, then sometimes it is easier to talk with a stranger. either way, you need to see someone, so you can get over the problem you are having , there is also a place to go for sexual abuse, and they will pay for your appointments, and i think the medication too, and help you out. So anyway you look at it if you really want to work through this issue, you are going to have to go and seek some professional help. As i said it may take time, but in the end it will be well worth it.

Answer 3

Visiting with a therapist really is the best thing- to talk to a safe person trained in this area. But, if you are so uncomfortable you don't think you can take that step, there are groups where people of the same issues get together to support each other because they can understand your situation and feelings- there should be some online places to meet people for support if you also do't want to go to support group. Just do a general search of Sexual Abuse Supprt Groups and go from there. Call your local Crisis Center (usually in the front of phone book with hotline numbers) for resources in area or other suggestions.

Answer 4

Often when things like this happen in life it doesn't mean you gave the other person any intention of doing it. In most cases the suspect is usually a victim also...just as you are now. At least 3 in every 5 females and males come into contact with someone who sexually abuse them. Whether it be a family member, a friend or a well known person. Sometime letting go and trusting god to do justice for you helps. Not everything in your life needs to be over just because of something like this. I know that sounds kinda harsh but I know what I'm taking about because I'm one of those victims to.

Answer 5

If you don't want to talk to a counselor how about a support group where people have been through the same thing/ You need to talk to someone about this, it is affecting your life. Have you tryed to read any books, like the courage to heal? you need to put your self in the shoes of the person that sexually abused you to see why he does it. maybe he was sexually abused, I know that still doesn;t make it right. you can't focus on it so much, just takes little steps everyday in the right direction. Take your pain out on helping other people that have been sexually abused also.. like a sex abuse hot line, where you can help other victims.Write a letter to the abuser and tell him how you feel.. you don't need to send it. Also journal your thoughts everyday, it will help you release some of the pain.Good luck to you and I hope this helps you get closer to your happiness, that was robbed from you.

Answer 6

It would not be a waste of money, most counselors are very good at working through the mess. Mine is. I am also healing from sexual abuse, it is a horrible thing to have gone through. The worst part for me, is realizing I can spend the rest of my life trapped in the past with that little girl in me being sexually and emotionally abused. It's not easy, and sometimes I want to just quit, but I believe I will be better able to handle life when I get through this. Good luck to you. Email me if you want to talk about this.

Answer 7

I was sexually abused/molested when I was younger and it is hard to discuss w/ a stranger, do u have a very, very close friend you could talk to about it? Have you ever tried writing a journal/diary about it? These two things helped me and continue to help me every day! Don't allow yourself to keep being the victim by keeping it all inside- try to write it all out on paper and if you feel a bit better about it, then either celebrate by burning what you wrote (like a letting go of the abuse ceremony) or shredding it piece by piece or save it to read later or to take to a counselor when you think your ready and just let the coun. read it and then maybe it will be easier to talk w/ one!! Good luck sweety- stay strong but don't let the abuse keep you a victim for always!

Answer 8

you never "get over" sexual abuse. You cope with it, and eventually you just don't think about it as much.

You really need to get counseling. How much you need the counseling depends on how long you were abused, at what age, by whom, how it happened, how others responded to it, what your personality is, etc. etc. The "courage to heal" book was pretty helpful to me. If you don't get counseling, your relationships and self esteem could be messed up for your entire lifetime, and you will suffer more than you had to and maybe never get what you want out of life because you were damaged by a terrible experience. Chronic post traumatic stress disorder from sexual abuse can cause depression or bring on other mental illnesses (I got bipolar disorder) if you are genetically vulnerable. I really found that a support group helped a lot. I hope you can get counseling. If your first counselor doesn't "click" with you, try another, don't give up.

Answer 9

I'm sorry that that happend to you. You should think about seeing a therapist. A therapist wont make you go in on your first visit and talk about what happend. They will help you until you feel comfortable talking about it with them or with someone you trust. The sooner you deal with it the better because it will affect you in every aspect of your life. If you are able to deal with the abuse now you may be able to help other people. It may be something that makes you feel ashamed but you have to know that its not your fault.

Answer 10

You need to talk about what happened to you and get it out of your system. Somebody did a awful thing to you and if you keep it inside it will harm you for other relationships and make you cut off from the outside world. You need therapy ...Friends and Family are good but they judge you as not being able to fight off your attacker or being just used and they feel sorry for you. You need a Support Team to back you and NOTE This is not just you Others have been raped too and You are angry at your attacker and upset that someone has invaded and stolen what is personal to you for themselves You never get over it...You just GROW and get stronger for your future and your children's future with you as their parent...Your Mate can be a big support too...The need to be a child again is also in the program of abuse..
The rapest needs therapy and forgiveness. This happened to them and they are action to what happen to them to put it on others and to take what they are afraid to go out and get a relationship that is proper...Then they have mental and physical issues to why they choose to take and fight to take from a innocent person. It is the turn on..to fight or take and harm they leave behind they are not thinking about you...It is their own needs and needs not being met and not feeling strong to their attacher. You can be on the look out that this attacker is not in your area. Yet he could have been looking at you for a time thinking he could... attack you with not a care about the mental state he left you not even give you a second thought.
So in the therapy you may want to let out how you feel about the attacher.
Each thing in life happens for a good reason We just do not understand WHY.
Take this and get stronger so you can talk to others who have been abused or raped... It is S when you do not want S and NO means NO