was I right to finish with my non-christian girlfriend?

Question

I'm a Christian and had dated a girl on and off for 5 years.If I wasn't a christian I would have married her no question,but it says in the Holy Bible that we shouldn't be unequally yoked to one another.This happened 6 months ago and I'm still hurting over it.It was one of the most hardest things I have ever done.I suppose it was my fault for hooking up with her in the first place.
The sinning was also a problem because although I knew it was wrong to be sleeping with her,although it was so good that I couldn't have asked for better in that department.
So I had to end it for that reason also.
Will God reward me for what I did for him,or is it wrong to expect any credit for what was painful to the both of us..

Answer 1

Grizzly,

Yes, you are correct in saying that God wants you to only be married to a Christian spouse if you yourself are a Christian. The same holds true in the dating arena--you should only date a Christian if you are a Christian, because to not is to be unequally yoked.

You mention that "..sleeping with her....it was so good that I couldn't have asked for better in that department."

There was a similar person in the Bible that fell into a similar temptation and gave into the same sin that you are describing. Have you ever read about King David? One day, he saw Bathsheba bathing and he felt lust towards her. So much so, that he had sexual relations with her. He even went so far as to have her husband killed so that he could cover up his own shame.

Yet, God redeemed David's life when he repented of his sin and used his life in a good way.

Sin always seems pleasant at the time, but the reprecussions are always detrimental. Meaning, sin feels good, but the after effects are always bad.

You ask, "Will God reward me for what I did for Him, or is it wrong to expect any credit for what was painful to the both of us."

Isaiah 64:6 says, "...all of our righteous acts are like filthy rags."

You see, God is so righteous and so Holy and nothing we can do can ever compare to His righteousness.

Have you ever seen sheep standing out in a field of green grass? Against the dark green grass, the sheep look very white--almost like fluffy white clouds. But you take those same sheep and put them against a backdrop of snow and you see just how filthy those cute little sheep are. The same is true when it comes to God and His righteousness vs. our "righteousness."

When we compare ourselves to other people, our "righteousness" looks pretty good. (Can't we all think of people that we've done "less bad" when compared to them? For example, you probably feel pretty good when you think about yourself compared with a rapist or murderer). Yet, when you compare yourself with God's righteousness, you see that there is absolutely no way to compete with Him. The Bible says that He is absolutely perfect.

That is why Jesus came to die for people. We are all like those filthy little lambs in the story. There was no way for us to be perfect like God, so Jesus became God's perfect sacrifice and died in our place. So now, God sees a person who has given their life to Christ as Savior and Lord as He would see Jesus. Jesus took our filth in exchange for His righteousness.

So no, you didn't do God a favor ("...what I did for HIM..."). In fact, He did YOU a favor by sending Jesus as a way to be forgiven for your sins, including the one that you committed with your girlfriend.

God extends His forgiveness to you and asks you to repent and put your trust in Him. When you do, He will forgive you and restore those broken areas of your life, making you new. Commit yourself as a Christian to saving yourself for the Christian bride that God will one day bring into your life and save your heart for the Lord.

People often think that God's rules are burdensome, but in reality, when followed, they save people from a lot of heartache. Including situations such as your own.

Turn from your sin, give your heart fully to God, become a man of integrity and be blessed.

From one Christian to another. :)

Answer 2

I know God will forgive you. I don't know about rewarding you. God will always love you no matter what you do and as christians, they're are decisions and choices we have to make that hurt and we have to walk in the spirit and not the flesh. Im sorry about your girl but you need to try to live like a christian and be an example. did you try to take her to church and she just wouldn't go? we are to be equally yoked and let me tell you, if you're not, it's going to never work out. go onto e-harmony.com!! A lot of christian girls and guys on there and it's wonderful.

Answer 3

Well, if you're telling the truth, you're a complete dumbshit. Why go 5 years with her if you are looking for a relationship with a future when it couldn't be with her? It's a shame that, according to many Christians, you will be rewarded despite your hypocrisy. Apparently you weren't too concerned with the Holy Bible when you had your penis inside of her. And no matter how much needless suffering you caused your ex, God will probably reward you for your betrayal as long as you say sorry.

Answer 4

Honey, you have to ask your own heart. A Christian will obviously tell you you did the right thing. Religion divides lovers, families, Nations. But if you're going to be so fundamentalist in your beliefs, then that is true to your own convictions. Personally, as an atheist (used to be Christian), I would put my true love in front of any dogma. But your faith might casue conflict in the relationship - especially if you were to go on to have children. It's not only better for you to leave her, it's better for her too, if you are so inflexible. For most people, a wonderful partner doesn't come around all that often.

Answer 5

So a fictional character in an old book is more important to you than a girl that loves you?

And you didn't know that beforehand?

Hopefully she's found somebody less horrible by now, someone who wasn't brainwashed from childhood.

That's the problem with believing in the supernatural - it makes you hurt *real* people.

Answer 6

Hmmmm. I was going to condemn you but then I thought of myself sleeping with a born again and I felt nauseous. Maybe we should not engage in relationships with fellow human beings with whom we are incompatible. There's 1440 minutes in a day, and most of us spend only about 1% of that time having sex. In the big picture, the other 99% of the time matters too.

Answer 7

Grizzly,

If your girlfriend is not a Christian, perhaps your purpose for being on earth is to show her how your love is enabled and magnified by your love for God and your acceptance of Jesus Christ as your personal saviour.

As for sinning, Sigmund Freud wrote that the only abnormal sex is no sex at all. And, sex is supposed to be an expression of love. I do not recommend promiscuity or casual sex, but sex between two loving adults is a celebration of their love.

Answer 8

There are many people who have happy marriages although they are of different religions. I am Buddhist and my husband was raised Christian, our marriage is wonderful and we support each other's choices. If you truly loved her, you would not have let religion stand in your way. If your religion means that much to you, you need to forget her and start dating girls who are of the same religious mindset as you. Why hurt any one else or yourself for that matter?

Answer 9

God rewards the those that look for after him. as long as u tried 2 get her 2 have faith, then there is not something that u would desire to do. he will advantages u with somebody that's a lot betta 4 u. christ can heal any harm. there is not something 2 annoying 4 our God. better of success 2 u.

Answer 10

God's love is unconditional - isn't this the biggest lesson of the entire Holy Bible? But yet your love was conditional . . . . . think you lost sight of the big picture there. In fact I think that maybe you missed the point entirely.

Answer 11

God resides in your heart, in the same place your girlfriend does. So, you can follow your heart as your God intended, or you can follow your bible, which was written by men who never witnessed any of it themselves, and has been translated many times, not always properly.