She asked me to be in the wedding in Feb. 2005. I bought the bridesmaid dress. The wedding was supposed to be July 2006 but got postponed. We have had some issues since, and now I think she doesn't want me in the wedding. Her cousin is my boyfriend, who was also supposed to be in the wedding. THe wedding is now July 2007 and I am not sure what to do. Should I have to pay for a dress that I am not going to wear because I have been UN-ASKED as a bridesmaid?
2007-01-10 08:10:50 · 11 answers · asked by JTJC 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You absoulutely shouldn't have to pay for a dress that you didn't need but bought solely for her wedding. If she wants you out of the wedding that's fine. However, she must pay for the dress as the decision not to be in the wedding isn't yours. That's the moral answer.
Here's the reality. Step out of the wedding party and count yourself lucky that you are getting rid of a shallow friend for the price of the dress.
Here's your revenge. Don't allow her or anyone else to have the dress unless they pay you for it. You can resale it or trash it. YOUR CHOICE or if you feel like fighting. Take her to small claims court. More than likely you will be reimbursed for the dress but at a depreciated price.
2007-01-10 08:23:01 · answer #1 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I sympathise with you. It's not much fun being a bridesmaid to a bridezilla.
If she says she doens't want you in the wedding then you should not have to pay for the dress. You need to find out for sure one way or the other.
If she makes you pay for the dress I would wear it to the wedding. How much fun would that be!!!! She'd hate it. Ahhh sweet revenge.
2007-01-10 20:30:43 · answer #2 · answered by Charlie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you need to ask her if you are still in the wedding party. Be tactful -- Bridezillas tend to explode. Figure out why you have drifted and if there is a way to repair the damage.
If she has class, she will pay for the dress you bought. My guess is (if she is a true Bridezilla) she will see this as your fault, hence your problem. I would expect to be stuck with the dress, but be elated if she pays for -- but I don't think it's too likely.
2007-01-10 16:27:00 · answer #3 · answered by Sweet Susie 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Have you actually been un-asked? If not then, keep the dress. Honestly, this sounds like a bit of paranoia on your part, she may just be super stressed out, I mean she has had to postpone for a year, that tells me right there that her road to marriage hasnt been paved very smoothly.
Regardless, you will need to have her tell you that she would like you to step down in order to re-coup the cost of the dress. If she asks you to step down, say no problem and then immediately tell her you will be needing your money back that you spent on the dress or if she is replacing you ask her if the new bridesmaid will be buying your dress from you. If you are uninvited, she will need to pay. If you step down you suck the cost up.
2007-01-10 16:18:57 · answer #4 · answered by kateqd30 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Listen Hun....i would ask her in person...text, e-mail and phone shows you have no-guts to stand up to that person and its very cheesy [so ive heard in previous cases] so i would call her up and say "listen...we need to take...can you start the coffe and ill be there in a 10 minutes????"
Once your at your house solve threw the problem then politely say " In All means...out of curiosity...am i still part of the wedding ceremony?"... If She says no....than i would say...well thanks anyways and if she says yes say thanks for making me part of this special day...
If You find you cannot talk to here i would just buy the dress... and if your not at the wedding you have two options...
1.Wear the dress to a formal party/prom/dinner and dance
2. sell it on ebay....they do dress, accesories and even purses...so you can list it for what you paid and get the money back!
Heres the Ebay links!
This Is to trhe Actual Bridesmaids dresses sections
http://clothing.listings.ebay.com/Wedding-Apparel_Bridesmaids-Dresses_W0QQfromZR4QQsacatZ105523QQsocmdZListingItemList
On The Left Hand Side Thiers Actually colours so you can see the differnet coloured dresses
Heres The Link to Ebay's Wedding Apparel
http://clothing.listings.ebay.com/Wedding-Apparel_W0QQfromZR4QQsacatZ3259QQsocmdZListingItemListQQssPageNameZdcpClothingTextFeat
Heres the Link To Wedding Accesories
http://clothing.listings.ebay.com/Wedding-Apparel_Accessories_W0QQfromZR4QQsacatZ15717QQsocmdZListingItemList
Heres the Link to the Shoes! [for weddings]
http://clothing.listings.ebay.com/Accessories_Shoes_W0QQfromZR4QQsacatZ105471QQsocmdZListingItemList
Good Luck and dont put two much pressure on yurself!
wooooo this took alonggggggggg time but u deserve it =]
2007-01-10 16:33:37 · answer #5 · answered by tickingclocks 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would say that you should just ask her. You wont be hurting anyone by double checking. If she says no she doesn't want you in the wedding- so be it. Then the ball is in her court. You wont get the money back for the dress. You can resell it on http://www.freeweddingclassifieds.com someone will buy it!
But don't back down unless she asks you officially, and even then be cordial. The best revenge is none at all, show her you are much better than a petty argument.
2007-01-10 16:17:35 · answer #6 · answered by glorymomof3 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
If she were any kind of person, she would pay for the dress. Chances are things have changed for her wedding and this is not the same dress that is going to be used by her current attendants, but if it is maybe one of them would buy it off you even if they have to have it altered.
2007-01-10 17:21:26 · answer #7 · answered by Question Addict 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well ask her if he doesnt want you as a bridesmaid because maybe you are reading the signs different. But if she says No than you shouldnt have to pay for it.
2007-01-10 17:12:56 · answer #8 · answered by Happy Mommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have been "officially" unasked by her in person, not just assuming she doesn't want you in the wedding, I would respectfully ask her to reimburse you for the dress. It is doubtful she will, but if you ask respectfully she might. If her cousin is your boyfriend I would ask him to support you in asking her as well. But all in all it is just a dress and in the end family is more important than bickering over money.
2007-01-10 16:19:29 · answer #9 · answered by mailersky 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
if yous have some issues it's likely she won't offer to pay for your dress, you could ask her to, but if it would be too uncomfortable maybe your boyfriend can for you and tell her that from both of your points of view she should reimburse you for the dress. good luck!
2007-01-10 16:18:28 · answer #10 · answered by jdchick48 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋