issues about sex?

Question

i want to have sex with my boyfriend but im really nervous that its going to hurt... ive told him this and he said that hell be gentle... im soo comftable around him and ive drcided that this is what i want but i dont want any pain... ladies can you help please..

Answer 1

First make sure you are really ready to have sex, think about why you are doing it and make sure it's not to make your boyfriend happy and it is really what you want to do. You've already spoken to him about it and he's said he'll be gentle which is good. If you haven't already, you should probably try doing other stuff before you have sex just to get comfortable with each other and make it less of a big deal if you've already touched each other/seen each other naked. My first time didn't hurt at all, as long as you are relaxed and take things slowly you should be fine. I would try to avoid arranging a specific time to do it, just when it happens it happens as then you will be more relaxed and won't be worrying about it beforehand. And if it does hurt, you can always ask your boyfriend to stop or slow down. Don't worry, you will be fine, just relax and communicate with your boyfriend. Good luck!

Answer 2

Painful Prob #1: Not Being Ready Physically

For very young girls who haven't gotten through puberty, experimenting with intercourse can be bad news. Because the body isn't ready, it's nearly impossible to insert anything into the vagina without pain.

Painless Solution
If a girl hasn't gotten through puberty, vaginal intercourse will hurt — often in more ways than one. In this case, it's best to hold off until the body matures. Next ...

Painful Prob #2: Anxiety and Emotions

Anxiety plays a huge part in any sexual relationship, whether it's the first time or just a new partner. Not only is it stressful, but it can have physical effects, too. For guys, this can mean trouble maintaining an erection or premature ejaculation.

Anxiety can also make sex difficult for girls. It can prevent adequate lubrication, and sometimes it can cause the vagina to constrict in involuntary spasms, making inserting even small objects extremely painful.

Anxiety can lead to vaginismus, which causes the vagina to tighten and close when penetration is attempted. The causes are usually psychological. Being raised in a very strict home, having negative feelings about sex, worrying that a partner won't be dependable, or having been sexually abused may contribute to the problem.

Painless Solution

Nervousness about sex is normal, but not stressing is better. If it's something you can't shake, it may be your body's way of saying, "Wait, I'm not ready for this," or "I don't like this person in this way." Not being emotionally ready or not trusting your partner are major signs you should wait. If your body is telling you "no," listen to it. If it goes beyond garden-variety nerves, and a girl thinks she might have vagninismus, she should have a gynecological visit with her health care provider.

Want to know a quick way to cut down on pre-coital nerves? Be prepared! That means, have condoms on hand or get another form of birth control. Anxiety about pregnancy and infections can definitely get in the way of having a good experience, so deal with that issue by being protected!

Painful Prob #3: The Hymen

The hymen ("cherry") is a thin membrane that stretches across the vaginal opening. Some girls are born with very little hymenal tissue, and other girls stretch their hymen through activities like playing sports or using tampons. But girls who have an intact hymen may experience some pain or bleeding the first time they have vaginal intercourse, as the hymen is stretched ("popped").

Painless Solution

If a girl expects that she'll be having intercourse and is worried about her hymen, she can prepare for it a few weeks ahead of time by inserting a clean finger or tampon into the vagina and gently pushing it from side to side. She may experience a bit of bleeding and pain when the hymen is stretched, but this is normal and nothing to worry about. In very rare cases, women who have very thick hymens may need to seek medical assistance to remove the obstruction.

Remember: Since pain can have a number of causes, when in doubt, consult a clinician. You can make an appointment at a Planned Parenthood near you by calling 1-800-230-PLAN

Answer 3

Hi, first make sure you love the guy, and secondly you will have to go through the pain sometimes just as long as this time you are ready to do it and your sure you wont regret it afterwards. No matter how gentle he will be it wont really matter. But making love is sacred and it adds to the specialness of it all. once its over then you will be ok and feel no more pain. All you have to think about is its not as pain full as you would expect. But make sure you relax and use protection.

Answer 4

Be sure you are ready you can never get another very first time.Be sure to use protection with spermicide.
Also with the pain if he is gentle and you or he doesn't rush but take your time working up to it then that Willl make it easier.
Also talk to your gynecologist about it she will have tips and suggestions.And if you are embarrassed to do that then you are not ready to have sex so wait.
A good question to ask yourself is if you break up the day after wil you regret being with him in that way?
If the answer is yes then i would wait .

Answer 5

Make sure you like this man,if you do and you feel ready then go for it.
It is not asbad as people might say,you know how us humans can sometimes over react.
Its prob more nice than what you think.
Dont worry,just relax and enjoy the ride but remeber one thing,if youre guy is willing to wait then whats the problem?
Have fun lady bird...

Answer 6

well if you really want to do it and he said he will be gentle then that is good maybe he will be but honestly hun like most first times do hurt but it only lasts for a very short time so i think youll be able to handle that cause after the first time you wont hurt ne more but one thing first do not lose your virginity unless you two love each other and are going to stay together be respectful to yourself

Answer 7

are you sure you want to do this , because once you start it is almost impossible for a man to stop, and you could end up having sex weather you want to or not, until you are absolutely sure do not even go in that direction, as well be sure you know your partner very well and are willing to live with the consequences of having sex, STD pregnancy, a big commitment

Answer 8

my boyfriend said the same thing but he is still trying because the only time we make out is at the movies and to have sex we dont have a place cause we dont always see each other so its up to you go ahead but be calm or wait until u ar older

Answer 9

The first time will probably hurt a little, just take your time and use some lubrication and things will be fine, plus the time after it won't hurt at all!
Be happy and enjoy

Answer 10

hi all i can advise is don't tense up that's the worse thing you can do .just set the mood how ever you want it and make sure you're relaxed and don't rush if you do have any probs use some lube.the main thing is that you're comfortable the rest just speaks for its self .hope the advice was OK.