If you tell a girl you like her but cannot date, why would she then state that she wants to be closer friends?

Question

She said she wants us to start sharing our deepest secrets with each other and become closer friends. I am not sure if this is such a good idea. I would like to know why she wants this kind of friendship!

Answer 1

That's all she can offer at the moment, maybe things will change. Friends make the best lovers so go with the motion!

Answer 2

You don't want to date her. Why would you share your deepest secrets? She is obviously interested in you. If your not interested in her, make some distance. But, then again rereading your question. It seems like you are sending a double message. On the one hand you are saying that you like her, but, cannot date her? Your playing with her emotions. The answer is the same though, she deserves better. Stop talking with her and stop sending mixed messages to her.

Answer 3

it isn't what you say it's what you do. telling her that you cannot date doesn't mean anything, you have to show it to her to get that point across. it's nothing to say that you can't date her, and then act like you're all into her and stuff like you're trying to get right with her or show concern like you do want to be that true friend. plus telling her that you cannot date her is more of a sign of your concious trying to make things right, or your avoiding your own feeling about her, than it is actually getting the message across.

it's like me telling someone we can be friends, yet i'm married yet i'm still in your face showing you that attention. or her doing the same to me, 'well i won't do this because of your own situation, or what would i get out it, etc.' but then she's constantly around, or taking advantage of opportunities to see where i'll take it. it means absolutely nothing, other than just to show you what it is that they want you to think.

being closer friends isn't a bad thing in and of itself, but it could place you in a situation where she's expecting that it would lead to something more. if you're closer friends that's simply what it is, noone has to say or agree upon that. if you're talk about it, then it doesn't exist, if it happens, there's no need to talk about it. that's the easiest way to look at it. so yeah it's not a good idea because you don't see her that way, you see her as someone who wants more when you want less. but she has to say something, if nothing else than just to save face and dignity, and perhaps you'd be ok with it, you obviously aren't ...

Answer 4

well you shouldnt have to be a genious to figure this one out.... This girl really likes you and does not want to give up. She still has some hope that you can date her, and she doesnt wanna lose you. I think this idea is ok, theres nothing wrong with being really good friends and sharing secrets.

Answer 5

I think she means that she wants you to tell her more about yourself, I could be wrong, but I don't think she wants to hear anything taboo. If she is wanting to hear taboo topics, then end this relationship. I don't know what it is exactly, but something is wrong there. Since you told her you like her but cannot date her, now she will try harder all the time. If you want this to stop, tell her that you've just become involved. Hope this helps.

Answer 6

Maybe she want to get to know you better. But i won't tell her my deepest secret.

Answer 7

First of all you shouldn't have told her that you like her, especially if you weren't going to be in a relationship with her. You have sent her the wrong signals and now she wants to be closer to you.

Answer 8

maybe she just enjoys your friendship.......no harm in that.