Amy and I have set a special time for just me and her to be together. Usually all we do is lay on the bed and I sing along to her favorite songs. She just loves this. It is what is helping us mend our relationship.
But lately our five year old son has been coming into the room and trying to get in the bed between us. I have tried to be patient with him. I gently remind him that this is just mommy and daddy time. This usually sends him back to what ever he was doing. But a few times he has persisted that he be with us during this time. I admit we usually end up giving in. Then I feel bad for giving up mine and Amy's alone time. What can we do so that our son can have the time with us that he obviously craves but still have some personal time just for us. Amy hasn't said that this bothers her but I know that it does.
I feel that Amy and I need this personal time together. Each time it seems to strengthen the bond between us. Our relationship becomes that much stronger. Any advice?
2007-01-10 03:54:05 · 12 answers · asked by Jerrie's Daddy 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Like you said, you need to provide your son with some special time of his own. Make a new policy at home...during mommy and daddy time, your son needs to be engaged in something else. Once Mommy & Daddy time is over, then he gets an hour of Mommy & Daddy doing something special with him...make sure it is something he really enjoys and has quality to it. If he likes watching a particular movie over & over, then make it special by making popcorn and watching it in sleeping bags on the floor. If he likes to ride his bike, then go to a park and ride with him...pack a picnic lunch or try a different park each time. Be sure to include your camera during these times, as precious memories are to be made. In additiona, I think that you will find you and your wife bonding even more as you work together to come up with ideas fro making your sons time special to him....quality time is quality time, no matter who is involved in it.
Remain selfish about your special time with your wife and don't give in to your son. After awhile he will notice a pattern and realize that once he allows you this time together, then he gets his special time too....he will look forward to and crave that time and soon the interuptions will stop. Be sure to stick to the plan. If he continues to interupt Mommy & Daddy time, do not reward the behavior with his special time.
My only other concern is what is your 5 year old doing during your private time with his wife...is he supervised, safe and involved in an appropriate activity? How long is he away from you during your sepcial time? It is not a good idea to leave a 5 yr. old alone and in charge of themselves. If he is being left to care for himself during Mommy & Daddy time, maybe you should reschedule your special time for after his bedtime.
2007-01-10 04:07:53 · answer #1 · answered by nexgenjenith 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'm curious why you two are in bed while your FIVE year old son is roaming the home. How long are you laying in bed while your child is able to do whatever he wants? This is what bedtimes are for. Send the child to bed at a decent hour and have your mommy/daddy time then. You both made this child so you just are going to have to deal with him first. Five years old is too young to be allowed to be left alone. He's alone if you're not with him. Put him to bed at about 8 [which is a great time for a five year old to be in bed] and then have your alone time. It's better this way too, if the child goes to sleep. Then you are not interrupted.
2007-01-10 04:59:15 · answer #2 · answered by musicpanther67 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait until your son is asleep. 5 is not a good time to leave him unsupervised for more than a few minutes. Also he needs to know that you are a family, that Mommy and Daddy love each other and are good together, but he is part of the family and welcome to join them. Why would you want him to feel like he is not welcome or wanted? You can sing and snuggle with him by your side if you want. Bond as a family when he is awake, let your son and wife know they are BOTH important to you. Then when your son goes to bed for the night let Amy know how special she is to you.
Good Luck
2007-01-10 04:02:04 · answer #3 · answered by micheletmoore 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Mommy and Daddy time should be after the child is in bed. For you to send your son out of the room while you are singing and having fun is crazy. He wants to be sung to too! Maybe you should be worried less with your time and more with his. Kids come #1.
2007-01-10 05:03:52 · answer #4 · answered by Melissa R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Family Guy--2. South Park--3. Simpsons--4. American Dad
2016-05-23 04:24:08 · answer #5 · answered by Danielle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since your son is only five I have to assume he has a pretty early bed time so schedule Mommy and Daddy after your son is in bed. Simple fix and you can have the whole night to do whatever alone.
2007-01-10 03:59:00 · answer #6 · answered by SHERRI 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Wait until after he is asleep or when he goes on a playdate. That's just the way it is. You can't expect to get alone time with a wide awake child in the house.
2007-01-10 04:04:03 · answer #7 · answered by KathyS 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Keep on keeping on. Stand your ground. You are doing a great thing for your marriage. In the long run this will also be great for the child to see what a strong relationship his parents have. He/she will have a sense of security. Continue to reinforce with the child, exactly what you are doing. After you are consistant, he/she will soon learn you will not budge on this. You guys are awesome. Keep up the great example of what relationships, family and love is supposed to be like. Peace and love to you all!
2007-01-10 04:03:39 · answer #8 · answered by Shayna 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
your personal time needs to be when he is asleep. not while he is up. when he is awake you need to be with him. no child should ever be unattended. many things can happen and your not near so you cant say what did happen. have your alone time after you r son is safe and asleep in bed or at school. never while he is uop and at home
2007-01-10 04:43:43 · answer #9 · answered by kleighs mommy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is why bedtimes are for. My kids go to bed at 8PM. My husband and I then have 2 hours together of alone time before we go to bed. Wait until after he sleeps, then have your time together.
2007-01-10 04:04:46 · answer #10 · answered by Velken 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋