Ok, I met this girl online. She seems pretty cool. Only thing is...i read her live jounal, and it turns out she smokes. Right away I would move on, the thing is she only smokes once in awhile...during exams and such. I think smoking is vile, and my mom died from lung cancer, so should I even keep talking to her/and eventually meet her/date her??? she seems nice other wise.
2007-01-10 03:45:06 · 39 answers · asked by Joe B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Move on.
You will always have this issue between the 2 of you.
Plenty of other girls who share your values out there. Don't compromise.
Good luck.
2007-01-10 03:49:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same thing happened to me -i met a guy online, met up with him & I am still with him. He smoked but it wasn't much of an issue cos I wasn't around it. Things got serious & I told him that I couldnt be with him if he smoked as I hated it that much - well he promised to give up - I moved in & it is now 5 years later. He is planning on giving up next monday (though Ive heard it all before!)
If I had met him in a bar or something, seen he smoked, then I would have just walked away.
Let her know (subtely) that you don't like smoking & see what she says. If she doesnt smoke that much then it may not be an issue.
Otherwise, you have to decide which is more important - having someone you care about who smokes, or not having her & no smoke.
Good luck!
2007-01-10 03:53:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had the same thing happen in my current relationship, except I was the smoker. If the two of you meet and hit it off then eventually she will quit because she cares for you. I was finally able to quit smoking four months ago and I could never have done it without my fiance's support. Oh and we have been together for over two years and we also met on the internet.
2007-01-10 03:52:44 · answer #3 · answered by mjobrien10 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
date her
2007-01-10 03:50:16 · answer #4 · answered by valary101 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I met my husband I smoked. He hated it and made it clear that he hated it but never made me quit or anything like that. But knowing that he hated it- I didn't smoke around him. I really liked him and we started hanging out a lot which meant that I was smoking a lot less. Eventually I stopped smoking. So if it your relationship becomes serious I would let her know how you feel. If she feels the same way about you and if your feelings are important to her, then maybe she will quit. I wouldn't not meet her because she smokes.
2007-01-10 03:55:01 · answer #5 · answered by Rockinrobin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How superficial and controlling are you?
You liked her and you wanted to go out with her yet you found out she smokes and now are already thinking about not doing when before you knew you were all for it and I am betting if you do then you will be asking her to stop pretty soon.
I am sorry you lost your mum but some people smoke and it is their choice if they want to quit not something you should impose on them. I worked in a hospital and I have know terminal lung patients going outside in pjs and dressing gowns with drips attached for a ciggie. You will only stop if you really want to and if she doesn't want to then why should she?
I wouldn't bother asking her out. She is better off without you.
2007-01-10 03:54:00 · answer #6 · answered by Bagpuss 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The fact that she smokes, especially since it is only once in a while, is a really silly reason to miss out on something potentially wonderful.
2007-01-10 06:08:55 · answer #7 · answered by Karen L 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know a long time ago, some people used to think of another group of people as 2nd class citizens. Infact, they decided that these people were so beneath them, they put them in camps.
These people were called Nazis...........
Seriously though, youre going to miss out on being with someone really cook because they smoke? Thats pretty lame.
2007-01-10 03:54:03 · answer #8 · answered by Jenster*is*flipping*you*off 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could talk to her about maybe wanting to go further in the relationship and how her smoking bothers you. If you're ok with it, she could not smoke when you're around... If you want her to completely stop, though, remember that it takes time to stop a bad habit so give her patience.
2007-01-10 03:50:31 · answer #9 · answered by TheWhiteGirl93 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok... you non-smokers are so whiny about stuff... You don't complain when your car smokes or anything... air polution..
We have smoking sections and non-smoking sections...
Ok....
if she only smokes once in a while... I really don't see a problem!!!
that means when she is under stress.
So....... Get OVER IT!
GEEEZZZZZZZZZZ
And just make sure she doesn't smoke inside. END OF STORY.
GROW UP!
2007-01-10 03:54:37 · answer #10 · answered by Stacy M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I dated my husband I drank heavily and it caused problems because I liked to fight when I drank (plus drunk people act stupid). After we realized we loved each other he told me one day that if I wanted the relationship to continue, I'd have to quit drinking because he just couldn't handle it emotionally. Some people would think giving ultimatums is wrong, but he was doing what was best for himself and he gave me the choice to choose what I wanted to do. I quit drinking and I'm so glad. Maybe you try the same technique, or just learn to live with it.
2007-01-10 03:52:10 · answer #11 · answered by Ihate R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋