This man is a friend, not a romantic interest. He lies about so much, it is hard to tell when he is telling the truth. (His stories are always conflicting).
He also tries to point out mistakes that others make so his work looks better (though there really is no difference).
His stories and BS are annoying and tiresome. He has a good heart, and I don't want to abandon his friendship. How do you deal with someone with such a low self esteem that they have to make up stories to try and impress? So you confront them? Do you try to complement them more (tried this, just seems to increase the BS)? Do you just let it go? Help! This situation is driving me nuts!
2007-01-10 03:25:50 · 15 answers · asked by True Dat 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Confront him - tell him that you value his friendship, but that this constant lieing and belittling you and others is causing a problem. Be supportive, and tell him that he can overcome this, but if he doesn't, you'll stop considering him as a friend, and move on.
Then be ready to follow through. If he doesn't change, and you don't move on, he'll just know that he never has to change, and you'll put up with his crap forever.
2007-01-10 03:32:44 · answer #1 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Point out facts whenever possible, for example, when his stories conflict, address it. "you were at the store, I thought you said you had no money" And when he explains, justifies, whatever, don't respond. Just let it be. That way he doesn't know if you believed him, or not, or what you think about it, and it will leave him to have to deal with it in his head and he may eventually see how pointless it is. And when he points out other's errors, don't challenge or agree, just say something you like about them or something they do well. It will make him feel foolish, and again, hopefully he will try to do better. He's lucky you are willing to be his friend anyway, many wouldn't.
2007-01-10 11:34:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him go. You are going to expend so much energy trying to figure out why this guy is like this and it is not going to help. You can make him aware that his BS runs together so much that nobody believes anything he says anymore. But if you keep calling him out on it he will eventually not want to be around you! He needs to figure out why he is so insecure and deal with it. No one is going to be able to help him with that. I dated a girl that was so insecure that she did the same thing. It was her comfort zone and when I would confront her she would get very defensive! I eventually tired of her talking about everybody we knew and broke up with her. She still talks crap about everybody to make herself feel better! I dated her when I was 26 and I am 33 now. So I guess it's a question of how much you can put up with? Good Luck......
2007-01-10 11:36:57 · answer #3 · answered by dfgrace22 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's tough. My brother-in-law is like that. I care for him but sometimes I don't even want to be around him when he says things that I KNOW are not the truth. It makes me mad b/c he's insulting my intelligence and imo not being respectful. I don't know the best answer.
It would probably be best to be honest in a non-judgemental way if possible. Just level with him. Tell him you care about him but that he is pushing you away w/the cut-downs and lies.
Best wishes to ya.
2007-01-10 12:15:21 · answer #4 · answered by Just Me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell this fella straight to the face from the bottom of your heart, there is nothing to worry about just your sincere feelings about the whole thing in regards to this person. Period.
2007-01-10 11:37:13 · answer #5 · answered by Always Can 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is the definition of a friend?Part of it means you don't lie to another friend.Whether he is lying or putting people down,be honest with him about how you feel.Call him on the carpet.Confront him about his behavior.If he gets upset or persists with his attitude,he's no friend and most likely is not worth the effort of maintaining a relationship with.
2007-01-10 11:33:41 · answer #6 · answered by 24carfan 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's a friend, you tell him. Otherwise, you just laugh it off or you could still tell him.
You can be assured, others are well aware of this also and are not impressed with his stories.
2007-01-10 11:31:48 · answer #7 · answered by S H 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why not just come straight out and tell him you feel bad for him. That whenever he puts someone else in a bad light and BSs, he's showing everyone how unhappy he is. Maybe that will hold a mirror up to him, and he'll see his behavior.
2007-01-10 11:31:14 · answer #8 · answered by shotze01 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow this person sounds so lame and annoying. hell no i wouldn't let it go. I HATE people who lie compulsively for no apparent reason, it's almost like they think you are stupid enough to actually believe all their crap, I sure would confront him, you might just be doing him a favor!
2007-01-10 11:31:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When he says something that is not true tell him its bullsh*t. If he puts u down get mad at him let him see it affected u(if he does'nt care then he probably isn't a good person).
2007-01-10 11:33:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋