My BF is a guy I dated a long time ago and we are back together and have promised new things. But I have a problem he wants me to stop some of the things I do but if I do I won't really be me. My ? is this I care for him but I don't want to change should I change for him or go with a guy that cares about me and likes me for who I am?
2007-01-10 01:44:49 · 22 answers · asked by spawnof_thedevil 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There is not a guy who will like you totally for who you are. We all have imperfections and if you love your girl/guy you try to get him better. I want my gf to stop smoking and have a stronger will.
Ive told her many times that i dont like her smoking and she knows it, and she wants to quit to but it isnt that easy.
She also knows that i want her to bet strong willed and she wants to improve that to, but its not that easy to change, little by little I guess.
Ive improved myself too..i dress better, i look better.
Its not about changing who you re but about improving.
The important thing is how he does it. He suggests or he yells at you and criticizes you all the time? Its in the way he act how you decide if hes good for you or not. Everyboyfriend you get will try to improve some things in you.
2007-01-10 01:55:19 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i defintly no how u feel apart from my guy im seeing wants me to lose my love handles get fastion and all this,. should he like me for me.. so he wants something im not whats that about.. well iam changing for him i no it sounds so wrong but i really like him and i can picture myself going out with him so i want to makt these changes.. and if u really like this person then maybe u should but thats for u to decide.. it depends on what it is aswell.. if is very big and like ur thinking why is he making me change this and ur shocked well i was shocked for a long time and i did cry wen he said he wants me to get rid of my love handles im a size 12 how skinny does he want me... and wenver im with him he says to me i want a girl that atheltic i will never be atheltic it would take me a year.. and is he still going to be around in a year i dnt know lol.. its totally up 2 u.. people are going to give u diffrent ansers and u still wont know.. its really ur dection are u in love with him? if u are then love is a powerfull thing i remember being inlove i would do anything for the guy like lose weight,, change everything and well if u do change these things is it enough for him? because i could become this really skinny stick insect and look sexy and new clothes etc.. and he still might be finding something he wants me to change.. and he will be taking me for a fool u have to think from the 2 points of views
hope i helped X
2007-01-10 01:53:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he loves you he has to love you faults and all. The things he wants to change is what makes you unique and you. There was probably a good reason why he was an ex, maybe it's time to make him an ex again. Don't lower your self esteem to change for someone, the only thing it sounds like needing change is him.
2007-01-10 01:48:57 · answer #3 · answered by jaws1013 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should definitely be yourself. If you decide to change for him there is a great likelihood that you will end up resenting him for not letting you be you. It's a different situation, if he wants you to change something that is harmful to you but other than that be yourself and find a guy who loves you just the way you are.
2007-01-10 01:48:32 · answer #4 · answered by NYGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should accept you for who you are! Don't change for anyone, as long as the things he's asking you to change aren't bad things, then stay the way you are.
Also maybe he's just looking out for you. It really depends on what he wants you to change, If he's a good guy then maybe he's just looking out for you.
Do what you think is best!
2007-01-10 01:49:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you shouldnt change your self
If your not doing the things you want then ur just making him happy not ur selff
Theres some guys out there that you can find that will be happy with who u are and if a guy cant like that then his not worth it.
This is just my thoughtt but its always good to be ur self no one else.
2007-01-10 01:50:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never change to please anyone but yourself. In the long run to will grow to dislike him for what he made you do. You have to be with someone who cares for you just the way you are and doesn't want to change you. This is the one that will make you happy.
2007-01-10 01:49:32 · answer #7 · answered by winter715 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there was a way that you can come into a compromise and meet each other half way, maybe things will work out. No matter who your with, someone will dislike something about your personality or physical condition. So try to work it out with him, since you do truly care for him.
2007-01-10 01:48:25 · answer #8 · answered by sarabmw 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i guess it depends on if they are bad things about yourself he wants you to change! i would say if they aren't really that bad and he is just kinda annoyed by them and they are things that make you who you are then i would say you deserve to have someone love you for who you are! but if they are rude, obnoxious, or just bad qualities i would say that maybe he is just trying to help you be a better person and he does love and you could try a lil harder to change some of those things! but like i said it all depends! i hope i helped!
2007-01-10 01:51:11 · answer #9 · answered by sarah gangsta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being committed to someone, requires giving from both people. If you are willing to give up some of these things, would he be willing to change some things for you. It cannot be all take and no give.
2007-01-10 01:48:09 · answer #10 · answered by ropemancometh 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋