Why wont anyone help me out here?

Question

I have been trying to plan my wedding, and my groom to be isnt really into it. He told me to tell him the day and time and he'll be there. Ive only been to a few weddings in my life, and I dont know what to do. I have booked the receptoin and ceremony site. It is being held in a restraunt place. Its going to be Sept 2006... I dont know where to go from here. My mom and I arent on the best of terms right now, long story, different posting. We do have two sons together, if that means anything. And we are in love. Just no one has offered to help me plan. His parents gave us $2000 to put towards the wedding. My mom isnt going to , due to the fact that she cant afford to. My dad passed away a little over 5 years ago. Its not the money I am looking for, more so someone to come with me to pick out things, as I havent the clue. We live in PA. Everyone else in Jersey, but the wedding will be in Jersey. How can I get someone to help me out? I thought about hiring a

wedding planner, but dont know how to go about doing so? The reception site gave me referalls for a dj and flowers. I dont know what to do now. Should I start looking at flowers? or booking a band or dj? Im so clueless. Sorry for being a bore. Everyone have a great day!

* sorry its Sept 2007

$2000 is not my budget... it is just what his parents are giving us.. Its more like $35000... we have money saved and such... i just want someone to like help me out.... i purchased the " brides planner" already at the book store, and have checked out the knot, and did there whole webpage and suggestion things... but im still clueless

the cake is done, the restaurant has that onsite baking thing going on, and they have silver candlelabras we are able to use.... im just so stressed out...we have 4 ushers and 4 bridemaids.... the maid of honor and the best man... but they are literally all over the place... like all over that states... my maid lives in jersey and has offered to help, but she has no idea what to do either... the menu is set... it is buffet style.... the pastor is booked...

i know that the cost difference in nj and pa is alot.... but i really wanted it in jersey.. at this place, called pantagis renassaince.... taxes alone are killing us....trying to find a dress

Answer 1

Well, I was extremely lucky, my parents did most/all of the work. My husband (now) purchased the programs and balloons. First off, you need to get your dress, and have the bridesmaids pick out theirs. Plus, grooms tuxes. I was fortunate enough to have family that made our flowers and bows for the church. So, that saved a lot of money. I just went to a local Grocery store in the area and had our cake made, (my grandma works there) and It was absolutely beautiful, they even had a fountain...and it was very reasonable in price. If you look around you can find a cheap d.j. to play for a few hours....we got some candlelabras from a local store and they came and set them up, but the recent weddings I have been too, didn't even have those, they just used some pedastles with candles, vinery and ferns. Make sure you also get the preacher/pastor, you might have to go through some classes, also a pianist/organist. We did our invitations through a local company, and they weren't really anything fancy, we paid about 350$ for about 200 invites. Then the programs where 45, but you don't really even need those. I know I am jumping from one thing to another...but things are just popping in my head...so I hope I am helping. My parents took care of all of the food...my dad and mom made everything...we got so many compliments...more than if you have it catered. We had bbq, potatoes, cheeseballs, fruit, meat, cheese, veggies, chips, meatballs, just all kinds of stuff. The hall was decorated with balloons, and table covers and some confetti. Don't forget about making your hair appts. either. Well, hope this gives you some info....I am just rambling. Hope your wedding is beautful, CONGRATS

Answer 2

How about somebody that is going to be in your wedding party? Maybe a maid of honor or one of the bridesmaids would be able to help you. Try a close family member like an aunt or cousin who has already been married. Wedding planning can be very stressful and you should have someone by your side helping you along the way. The main things to book in advance are the hall, photograper, music, food, flowers. The other little stuff (invitations, centre pieces, giveaways etc. can all be done throughout the year). It is your day. Do what ever you want with it! And I would also make your fiancee get off his butt and help you out too. Do you really think it is fair for him to just sit back while you do all the planning?

Answer 3

You should go to a bookstore and purchase a nice wedding planner for yourself. THey usually have a calendar and a check list counting down the days till the wedding. That should give you some sort of a guide.
Also try www.theknot.com. They will help you out tremendously...and their site has ideas galore about buying flowers, dresses, reception info and much, much more.
I would not hire a wedding planner on such a limited budget. They can be very pricey.

Get you some girlfriends together. Ya'll can all pick it out together. It is most fun in groups.

Answer 4

Sorry for the distress this is causing you. It shouldn't have to be that way. What I would recommend you do is get the flowers the band/dj out of the way. Make phone calls to places in jersey. Have phone interviews. But before you do that make sure you know what flowers you want, that helps a lot and makes the process easier. Think of what kind of arrangements you want as far as styles go and colors. How many flowers you want, how much you want to spend. So when you have this settled than you can make phone calls and have phone interviews ask if they can send you pictures of past weddings they have done via email, so that you can see. It can be done, trust me I have done that. Do they same for the band, plan ahead what you want in a band or dj, than make phone calls. often they can send you demos thru the mail. Explain that you live distant from them. When you decide on your venders make it a day trip to sign the contracts. I hope this helps and good luck to you and sorry I couldn't really be of much help. Congrats

July 07' Bride.

Answer 5

You are being overwhelmed at the moment. Take a deep breath & slowly let it out. There.

Accept the fact that some men just aren't into planning a wedding; they can't handle the thought of picking out colors
(what IS the difference between ecru & off white) or chosing flowers.

What you need to do is get organized. Email me with your mailing address. Use this one or use the one on my site
www.weddingvowsandpromises.com
I have a wedding checklist I give my brides. Once you have this in hand, you can decide what you REALLY have to have & then budget your time knowing what you want & need to do. Buy a cheap binder and put this in it along with your ideas, fabric swatches, color choices, phone numbers, etc. Make it your constant companion. You will be ok.

Answer 6

Does he have sisters or aunties which generally love to spend time with a new relatives you make a girls day outing.Sounds to me like he has put the burden on you and that frankly isn't fair maybe you need to sit down and discuss this situation before the I dos come along is this going to be an on going thing even after your married if so then plan on getting stuck doing everything by your self because later on it can and does cause hurt feelings and many undue problems. I wish I could help you but your partner needs to get real and get involved now if he wants to share a life with you and happiness too. I can tell you that planning the reception is costly and you need to rent a hall check on foods you both like and caters in the area cost of minster and decorations. Good Luck and Congratulations on the

Answer 7

This is where the maid of honor and bridesmaids can actually be really helpful. Plan a girls' day on the town, stop at floral shops, dress shops, craft stores, etc., and have fun, for goodness sake!

Planning a wedding can be stressful, but it shouldn't be so frustrating that it brings you to tears! It sounds to me like you need to cut down a bit -- you have stretched yourself too far. Are there any parts of the planning that you can cut out -- for example, would planning be easier if you didn't have so many attendants (bridesmaids, flower girls, ring bearers, etc.)? Would it be easier if you invited less people? Would it be easier if you had a buffet-style or just hors'dourves instead of a whole three-course meal? Think about what's REALLY important, and focus on that.
Good luck!

Answer 8

Okay, this is going to sound totally ridiculous, but when we were first engaged, 19 months before the big day, I went on ebay and searched "wedding" and just let it roll on that general search. I found so many things that I would never have thought of, like pew bows, disposable cameras, favors and bubbles.

Don't feel like you have to buy on there, but it's a great place to get ideas.

I wish I could help you feel better, and if we lived closer, I'd come be your right hand. Like the others have said, try to stop stressing. Checklists might help you there so you can see that you're making progress.

Best wishes.

Answer 9

Do you have a maid of honor? If so, you will find that she will become your right hand during this. It isnt unusual for Men to just want to be told when and where. My BF just got married and her husband was the same way, she leaned on me (her MOH) alot and I was more than happy to do anything she wanted. I went to meetings with the reception place, florist, dj etc, it was alot of fun and only made she and I closer.

I live in NJ too, dont worry, us Jerseyans have your back!

Any questions, my email is accessable.

Best wishes!

Answer 10

for a wedding reception to be good you need 2 things.

1) Good DJ
2) Good Food

The rest is icing...

Focus on your dress. Flowers are nice but over priced. Get married in PA not NJ the cost difference alone is worth it.

Order of importance

1) Dress
2) Photographer
3) DJ
4) Flowers